I received an email today offering a product that apparently would make my penis much larger. Before I take the plunge, I want to be fully informed. I have never received an offering to make my penis smaller, so maybe there aren’t any negatives, but let’s see.
My primary worries:
Tailoring clothing. If I am hung like a mule will I need to buy all new pants or can they be altered?
Toilet use. Will my wang dangle in the water when I’m seated? How do the well hung handle this?
The beach. Will people gawk at the beach? Can I wear something under my suit to help minimize the bulge?
Thanks for any help. If it all seems worthwhile, I will finance this with the money my long lost uncle left me when he passed away recently while in Nigeria.
Seems to me that you’ll be stuck with wearing pleated pants, unless you want to give all the ladies a free show every day.
I have no earthly idea.
Wear tighty whities under your swim trunks?
Maybe something else to consider - supplements for increasing blood volume. Whenever I’ve seen, ah, photographic evidence of large organs in use, :o they always seem to be somewhat less than fully deployed. That could impede whatever impact you were hoping to have on a partner. Just a thought.
Like these two really well-hung guys, see, were struttin’ across the Golden Gate Bridge, OK? The first one just had to take a leak, so he unzips and hangs it over the side. The other guy does the same.
Sex becomes more like parking a car. “Further… a little further… ack! Too much! Back up! Back up! Crap… I think you broke something. In case my ovaries are crushed for good, you’d better give me your insurance information.”
Oh, and to actually answer your questions:
Your pants will need to be altered. On the plus side, you need only lift one leg and perch your foot upon the toilet seat in order to urinate. Also, you can extinguish small forest fires and write your name in flowing script in the snow/building walls with the improved control and handling.
Slinging your wang over your shoulder as you sit upon the toilet, possibly wrapping it warmly and loosely around your neck like some majestic shawl should take care of that.
Yes. People will gawk. They will if you have a small penis, a regular penis, a large penis, or a herkin’ penis. I say flow with it. A Speedo is all you’ll ever need.
Yes. Yes they are. When I said you’d be stuck with pleated pants, I should have added something to the effect of “which might turn people off before you get a chance to turn them on.”
I had buddy who has a very large organ. It took three of us to pick it up and move it for him. It was old and dusty too. Although it broke a couple casters moving it around, we were able to manage it.
Wow. I’m shocked!! I didn’t know such a product existed–I thought it was just an urban legend. Can I buy it, too?
The guy must be a really close friend to tell you such intimate stuff.
Who sent this mail to you? I’d like to send him my email address so he can contact me too. … Because I’m sure he doesn’t have many people on his email list; after all, it’s a difficult subject to bring up with strangers.
If you want, after trying that, I keep getting e-mails from some “h0rny l3zb1an gurlz that w4nt ur c0c” that you might want to try your newly enlarged member on.
