Ladies a tour of my bedroom? (Boom-chika-chika. No not like that)

[Shakes]

So I'm looking around my bedroom and I'm wondering what ladies (probably) typically think when they see my bedroom for the first time.

Do they think I'm immature? I need to grow up? Or am I typical for a 37yo single male? So heres the tour and please feel free to be as brutally honest as you would like. No need to worry about hurt feelings.

And single guys please feel free to chime in if you're on par or NOT on par with me.

So here's the tour:

Wall 1: 1 beer girl poster (the only girlie poster in my room) and a dream catcher above my bed.

wall 2: A (nice) metal tin of Route 66/motorcycle poster and a black light poster of a panther.

Wall 3: A calendar (well OK maybe I've got two girlie pics up. But at least this one functional)

Wall 4: TV, computer, entertainment center.

Nick knacks around the room: A black light, a lava lamp, A Francisco Cordero bobble head doll (baseball dude), A couple of candles and thats about it worth mentioning.

Bedroom furniture is all oak wood.

I also have a recliner in my room.

Well, there ya' have it. Typical? or not?

[FairyChatMom]

Windows? Curtains? Carpet? Closet door open or closed? What kind of light(s)?

My initial reaction was galvanized with the black light poster - High School!

Of course, I'm just an old grouch, so take it for what it's worth.

[Kalypso]

If I were dating a 37 year old man (I'm 33), I wouldn't hope to find what you've described in his room. I would like to see framed art and a more mature design theme. I wouldn't mind erotic art, but not girlie posters. I could get with the lava lamp and black light panther only if you had a quirky-cool cohesive retro theme throughout the room, and a personality to match. I worry your bedroom gives an impression of immaturity.

Having the office and chair in there would really be only acceptable if you share your home/have roommates. You've described something that would remind me of a dorm room.

A very plain room with no wall decoration and minimal knick knacks is what I have usually seen in the adult men's bedrooms I've been privy to. That's OK and expected, some men don't do design.

I hope I haven't been too harsh.

[FaerieBeth]

Brutally honest? Well....if you are sure...

Originally Posted by SHAKES

a dream catcher above my bed

This is the point at which I would smile and tell you, "You're such a great friend! I am so glad I have someone like you that I can really talk to."

[Kayeby]

Sounds like my fiance's brother's room - but sorry, he's 22.

[Ludy]

I have to agree with every one else, it is much too high school.

If you want a girly picture on the wall, go for a tasteful nude, or erotic painting, but even a girly calendar is too immature for my tastes.

[Green Bean]

No, your decor is not typical of a 37 year old male.

If I were to enter your bedroom, any feelings of attraction I had toward you would instantly evaporate, and be replaced by an uncontrollable urge to laugh my ass off.

[Phlosphr]

SHAKES - I'll make it easy for you - we are the same in age/gender - Posters tacked to wall = Bad. Frames around pictures = good. Black light = Bad. Velvet posters = ok sometimes if tasteful.

Ditto most everyone else.

[Southern Yankee]

I'm assuming this bedroom is still in your parents' house? (Only sort of being snarky... otherwise I would have expected a tour of the rest of your place too.)

[WhyNot]

Yes, unless you're in college or really, really good at irony, I'm afraid what you've described is fairly immature. When I turned 26 or so, I announced to my husband that no art was to go on the walls unframed. That doesn't mean no posters - I actually have a Moulin Rouge! poster in my living room you can have when I'm dead, but it's in a grown up frame with glass (okay, probably plastic of some sort) and everything. Calendars should be reserved for offices or the inside of a cabinet somewhere. Black light, lava lamp and poster of a panther? No. Just....no.

[anu-la1979]

I sorry, I just read "blacklight poster of a panther" and had an uncontrollable laughing fit.

Yeahhh, so when my brother-in-law met my sis for the first time he still had a gigantic framed poster of a golden retriever puppy with a rose in its mouth in his apartment (he lived with 2 other mit dorks in an apartment).

I still don't understand how she managed to look past it. Okay, I do, he was a good catch and makes her deliriously happy etc.. But we still mock him about it relentlessly.

[aruvqan]

Wow.

Um, errrr ...

To be totally honest that screams 20 year old not going to college and still lives with parents in the 70s and probably smokes weed ... the only thing you didnt describe is the multicolor brown deep pile shag carpeting and the camero in the driveway with fuzzy dice hanging from the mirror.

If you really want to update, I agree with Kalypso in framed art. If you feel the need for prurient art, there is a lot of great classic art that is skin bareing. How about Goya's Maja desnuda or for a whimsical one Picasso's Nude on a Black Armchair or even a woodblock print by Katsushika Hokusai [google his name and octopus. Premodern hentai...] On the plus side, if you go with the japanese woodblock print you can always ask them up to see your etchings=)

I would suggest a nice office armoire to hide the computer gear when you have a woman over, and perhaps even hide the entertainment center. I agree that it screams dorm room/living at home and have to keep everything in your room.

[Shakes]

Originally Posted by Southern Yankee

I'm assuming this bedroom is still in your parents' house? (Only sort of being snarky... otherwise I would have expected a tour of the rest of your place too.)

Ha! This makes me laugh! No, the rest of my house is very grown up that's why I didn't ask for opinions on it. This is funny because when I moved in I basically handed my Mom my credit card and told her to make the place look nice. (except my bedroom)

FWIW, my Mom is a very hip, modern woman with an eye for this sort of thing. Or so I've been told. She lives for that kind of stuff.

She doesn't like my bedroom either.

[Phlosphr]

So what you are saying is your mother decorated your apartment all but your room?

[Gala Matrix Fire]

You lost me at beer girl poster. But you could get away with Manet's painting of a beer girl.
I wouldn't assume you were immature, just someone who hasn't updated his bedroom decor in over a decade. The only thing I do in my bedroom is sleep, so I don't spend much time thinking about how it looks.

[Shakes]

Originally Posted by Phlosphr

So what you are saying is your mother decorated your apartment all but your room?

Yes, when I got divorced from my ex-wife she kept all the furniture except the bedroom furniture. So I told my mother NOT to worry about my bedroom.

[Hostile Dialect]

Originally Posted by Gala Matrix Fire

You lost me at beer girl poster. But you could get away with Manet's painting of a beer girl.

Perfect! Thanks.

[Freudian Slit]

What's acceptable for a 23 year old girl? Er, woman? I have this Sopranos poster and the Edward Gorey poster with all the dead kids. Both are framed.

[sugar and spice]

I think a classy retro advertisement poster would be fine -- something like this -- but just a girl in a bikini no so much. Maps and city-scape photo prints are also good decor options for a guy's room.

I wouldn't think you were immature, but perhaps that you had, em, simple tastes.

[Cyn]

An inviting bedroom where a woman can imagine spending time is important. Plump pillows, soft comforter---makes me want to dive in! Dingy, old, worn bedding is a real turn-off for me. The girlie posters/calander would not make me take you seriously. The lava lamp and black light poster could be passed off as whimsy. When I moved in, I had my husband move the computer and tv out of the bedroom; who needs an entertainment center in their bedroom when you have a perfectly nice person right there?

[Hostile Dialect]

Originally Posted by Zoggie

What's acceptable for a 23 year old girl? Er, woman? I have this Sopranos poster and the Edward Gorey poster with all the dead kids. Both are framed.

I think you mislinked, there. That's the thread about my Panic Disorder diagnosis. (Oddly enough, I was just looking at that before I clicked on your link...)

[Freudian Slit]

Originally Posted by Hostile Dialect

I think you mislinked, there. That's the thread about my Panic Disorder diagnosis. (Oddly enough, I was just looking at that before I clicked on your link...)

Wow, I feel stupid. This is what I meant: http://www.gandolfini.com/sopranos4.jpg

Or as close to it as I'm going to get (it doesn't say DVD on mine...)

[WhyNot]

Originally Posted by Zoggie

Wow, I feel stupid. This is what I meant: http://www.gandolfini.com/sopranos4.jpg

Or as close to it as I'm going to get (it doesn't say DVD on mine...)

I'd love this in a living room (provided there's an entertainment center in there) or an office, den or home theater. It would put me off in a bedroom. It's not exactly soothing, which is what I want in a bedroom.

[Cat Fight]

Originally Posted by WhyNot

Yes, unless you're in college or really, really good at irony, I'm afraid what you've described is fairly immature.

My thoughts exactly. I actually love kitsch, but it's like you took every dorm cliché and put it in one room. And seeing cheesy girlie pics in a guy's place is a complete turn off for me. Makes me think he doesn't have much interaction with the real thing.

[Freudian Slit]

Originally Posted by WhyNot

I'd love this in a living room (provided there's an entertainment center in there) or an office, den or home theater. It would put me off in a bedroom. It's not exactly soothing, which is what I want in a bedroom.

Well, keep in mind, I actually live in a studio, so technically my bedroom is my entertainment center and my kitchen and my dining area. Actually, the picture is right over my table where my laptop is kept, so I think of it as the dining/computer "area."

[WhyNot]

Originally Posted by Zoggie

Well, keep in mind, I actually live in a studio, so technically my bedroom is my entertainment center and my kitchen and my dining area. Actually, the picture is right over my table where my laptop is kept, so I think of it as the dining/computer "area."

Oh, heck yeah, that counts. And you did say it was in a frame, right?

Studios by their very nature get extra slack in the Pop Culture department. They're just cool like that.

[Dangerosa]

(Oh, flight instinct kicking in......How can I get out of here this very minute without making this guy feel bad. Headache? too cliche....left iron on at home....potential.....oh, I got it....)

"Shakes, this has been great, but I have to go home a vacuum the cat now....."

[The Scrivener]

I'm not exactly a standard-bearer of WASPish good taste either, given that my bedroom's decor evokes New Orleans cathouse crossed with French SE Asian Colonial, with a nice repro of a painting of a googly-eyed kitten caught in the rain tossed in. (And no, I'm not going into any more detail.) I loves me kitsch, too.

Still, there's good kitsch and bad. I'd update the art, ditch the dreamcatcher, nix the black light (unflattering on skin tones, if great for roller rinks), and even reconsider the furniture, but that's because I really hate oak, unless it's stained so dark it's unrecognizable by grain. You didn't mention the flooring... carpet? What kind, color? Regardless, it probably could use a thorough cleaning, if it's as old as the rest of the room. And ditto for the walls... what color? Your room would probably benefit immensely from a fresh coat and color. And small, low-wattage accent lamps... your room would doubtless benefit from two or more of these.

[HazelNutCoffee]

I'm 25 and if I saw a friend's bedroom that looked like that I'd tease him unmercifully about it. I don't mind a bit of kookiness but all of that together seems like too much.

[Sunspace]

:: thinks of own studio apartment ::

Cripes, I'm doomed....

Lessee... walls of books. Several framed Chuck Potter prints, plus one by an artist whose name I can't remember called Trail to Charizoni, plus one by my mom. Way too much junk. Mixture of random furniture. Dust. Computer, scanner, printer, sound system all side-by-side and interconnected. Drawing board next to same. I have good cookware, though.

According to you guys, I haven't a snowball's chance in hell.

Is there no compassion for someone who's worked their way out of debt and couldn't afford to get new furniture or anything nice for many years, and is only now making improvements?

[corkboard]

Not to beat the horse, but it's sounding really 80's college dormy. I'm male/40, and if one of my peers had that stuff in his room I'd give him endless shit about it. If money is an issue, I think minimalist is the way to go- nothing or nearly nothing on the walls, paint the walls a nice cappucino color, white ceiling, maybe a single small framed print or two. Get the TV/computer/entertainment center out of there. Simple bedding, maybe a chair in the corner to match the dresser.

[twickster]

Originally Posted by Sunspace

:: thinks of own studio apartment ::

Cripes, I'm doomed....

....

Is there no compassion for someone who's worked their way out of debt and couldn't afford to get new furniture or anything nice for many years, and is only now making improvements?

There's a difference between "not decorated" or "functional," which is what your space sounds like, and "decorated like a superannuated frat boy's Kliche Kollection," which is what the OP is describing. You should be okay, though you might want to make an effort to get the clutter under control a bit.

[HazelNutCoffee]

My roommate and I are pretty poor, but we still get compliments on our apartment. All of our furniture is from charity shops/dumpsters/Ikea/cheap Internet deals, and our decor is random stuff we happened to own (ratty tapestry from Brazil courtesy of my roommate's grandmother, colorful Indian quilt bought on sale during my summer abroad, postcards put in cardboard frames, fake antique clock from BB&B, etc). It's not about buying expensive stuff, IMO - it's perfectly possible to decorate your apartment tastefully on a tight budget.

[Zebra]

Humm...

My bedroom.

Walls are painted a nice brown. The wall color actually goes up on the celing for 8 inches, giving a border and it fixes other problems with the walls.

There are two built in sets of shelves. One is full of music cds. The other, over my bed, has books and board games.

The art is all framed.

Movie poster of Tomb Raider II-that is signed by Ms. Jolie.

A detail section of 'The Wet Cupid' by William Adolphe Bougereau .

A poster from a photography exhibit from the Met that was about fashion photography of the 20's.

A poster for the Paris Zoo with a panther and a leopard. I usually say my cat picked that one out.

A large photograph, taken by me, of a statue at the met, (includes naked breast)

A print of a image by Gil Elvgren. He was pin-up artist of the 40's 50's and 60's. This one was never published. It features a woman being 'presented' to a Shiek as an addition to his harem.

A good sized mirror.

Over my dresser is another mirror and a set of 8x10 'headshots' all taken by me.


The floor has a bamboo area rug. I have a 'directors chair that I use when I'm doing a client's makeup. (I'm a photographer, if you haven't guessed) There is a nice laundry hamper that goes with the rest of the decor.

There is one window but I live in a basement apt. So the window opens to a concrete shaft.

If you are entering, you can bet that the closet is closed and there are no dirty clothes on the floor.

So, do I get any?

[Tastes of Chocolate]

Originally Posted by The Scrivener

with a nice repro of a painting of a googly-eyed kitten caught in the rain tossed in. (And no, I'm not going into any more detail.)

Dang. I think we have that same poster. It's got a history with my SO, so he wants to keep it. But it's sitting in a closet now.

[Sunspace]

Originally Posted by twickster

There's a difference between "not decorated" or "functional," which is what your space sounds like, and "decorated like a superannuated frat boy's Kliche Kollection," which is what the OP is describing. You should be okay, though you might want to make an effort to get the clutter under control a bit.

:: sighs with relief ::

I have to admit, "minimalist" is sounding more and more attractive right now. As well as "new paint".

On a side note, how do Dopers feel about hanging your own art on the walls?

[The Scrivener]

[googly-eyed hijack]

Originally Posted by Tastes of Chocolate

Dang. I think we have that same poster. It's got a history with my SO, so he wants to keep it. But it's sitting in a closet now.

Do you remember if it's textured, to suggest the surface of a painting? Mine's not a conventional poster; it's printed on heavy cardboard stock, it's got that painterly texture (you have to examine it up close to see it's not really an original), plus it's rather small, about 12" x 16" or so -- and I found it in an antique shop, framed.

[/googly-eyed hijack]

[Ephemera]

Originally Posted by Sunspace

On a side note, how do Dopers feel about hanging your own art on the walls?

Perfectly acceptable so long as it's worth presenting in the first place.

[MovieMogul]

Originally Posted by SHAKES

Yes, when I got divorced from my ex-wife she kept all the furniture except the bedroom furniture. So I told my mother NOT to worry about my bedroom.

Sooner or later, this information is going to come out as well, and it well reflect very poorly on your part. In short:

(1) His mom does his decorating for him
(2) The only room that reflects his actual taste is one someone 10 years younger should've already outgrown
(3) Opal wept

[WhyNot]

Originally Posted by Zebra

So, do I get any?

Yep! Being an artistic type, you get more room than most for eclectic art pieces, but I'm not sure about the Paris zoo piece - does it have words? I don't like words in the bedroom. *snerk*

Generally in a bedroom I prefer only one or two paintings or abstract designs - again, because you don't want a bedroom to come across as frenetic or energized; a bedroom is for relaxing, and the art in there, along with the wall colors, bedding, etc., should generally serve the purpose of soothing and calming. While they don't have to match, again generally speaking, keeping with one theme (rennaissance nudes, tigers or African prints) or two colors (chocolate and cream, beige and russet, sage and lavender) with perhaps a splash of a third accent color keeps things calm and collected as well. Photographs and posters tend to be more energizing, and best saved (IMHO) for spaces where you want people to be alert and "up". Words are very "active", so a poster with words on it is usually not the best choice for a bedroom, IMHO.

[Eureka]

Originally Posted by Sunspace

:: sighs with relief ::

I have to admit, "minimalist" is sounding more and more attractive right now. As well as "new paint".

On a side note, how do Dopers feel about hanging your own art on the walls?

Go for it. With caveats as appropriate based on content, theme, and number of pieces of artwork. ("Minimalist" beats the "Fridge Door Belonging to the Proud Parents of a Kindergardener" all hollow).

And while you don't neccessarily want to frame all your artworks, figuring out a way to display your artwork that looks semi-permanent rather than transient is a good idea. Even if you choose to rotate your favorite pieces seasonally, or keep the most recent six paintings up or whatever.

[Freudian Slit]

Originally Posted by WhyNot

Oh, heck yeah, that counts. And you did say it was in a frame, right?

Studios by their very nature get extra slack in the Pop Culture department. They're just cool like that.

Yup, it is in a frame.

Thanks.

I only have the two posters, and both are framed. I have room for more, but I figure why clutter the place up?

[Zebra]

It looks like this.


Only mine doesn't have so much writing. It's just Paris Zoological Garden.

[Spoons]

Originally Posted by Sunspace

On a side note, how do Dopers feel about hanging your own art on the walls?

Having seen your art, Sunspace, I'd say go for it. Nicely framed and hung, of course; not tacked or taped. But you knew that. Your stuff is good, and the fact that it's yours would no doubt be a great topic of conversation if a young lady was to stop by.

[twickster]

Originally Posted by WhyNot

Words are very "active", so a poster with words on it is usually not the best choice for a bedroom, IMHO.

Hm. Two of the three (framed) posters in my bedroom have words on them -- good thing I'm a girl and don't need to worry about potential sleep-over guests judging my beddability based on decor, eh?

[Sue Duhnym]

Originally Posted by The Scrivener

I'd update the art, ditch the dreamcatcher, nix the black light (unflattering on skin tones, if great for roller rinks),

A man should be worried about black lights in the bedroom for more reasons than unflattering skin tones and glowing teeth.

Materials That Glow Under Black Light Pay special attention to the "Bodily Fluids" section.

I agree with everyone here, it's time for a bedroom update.

[Uga VI]

Originally Posted by SHAKES

Wall 1: 1 beer girl poster (the only girlie poster in my room) and a dream catcher above my bed.

Okay, I'm a guy. However, I've picked up a thing or two since college (That was about 10 years ago). Suffice it to say, you probably lost most of the ladies at "poster". I won't even touch "beer girl", or the rest of it.

A good rule of thumb: If the majority of your decor comes from either Spencer's Gifts or The Sharper Image, you may encounter some resistance with the women-folk.

[Sunspace]

Originally Posted by Sue Duhnym

Materials That Glow Under Black Light Pay special attention to the "Bodily Fluids" section.

And I thought those UV flashlights were only for finding dried cat pee...

[Shakes]

This is cracking me up. I wonder why none of the ladies I've dated have never said anything?

[Freudian Slit]

Originally Posted by Zebra

The floor has a bamboo area rug. I have a 'directors chair that I use when I'm doing a client's makeup. (I'm a photographer, if you haven't guessed)

So, do I get any?

Oh, I think that goes without saying, Mr. Photographer!