What Type of Factory Makes Milk?

[Ken001]

Milk for most of the OECD consumers arrives in wax-coated boxes or plastic bottles. Where is it manufactured? Do you children know?

[grude]

What is an OECD? I could google it and figure it out, but you use it so freely.

I would think milk comes from a dairy, as for where it is stored and processed and packaged um a processing plant?

[Huvudtvätt]

Is this a Whoosh?

The milk comes from animals called "cows". They live at places called "Farms". The owner of the farm ("Farmer") sells the milk to a "Dairy" or "Milk processing plant" where it is processed and packaged. (Sometimes these plants are owned by farmers' collectives). The plastic-coated paper boxes was an invention by the company Tetra-pak.

[Richard Pearse]

Mmm, tell me more about these "cows".

[Richard Pearse]

OECD = Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development. Basically the "nicer" countries to live in.

[Gyrate]

Next you'll be telling me that there's a "magic animal" that we get pork, ham AND bacon from.

But I think Post #3 covers the OP as much as can be answered.

[chappachula]

I dunno about them "cows" and "milk" stuff, ...but, man, what I wanna know is where they make chickens.
There's something wrong with the factory where they make the whole chickens---The individual parts are pretty nicely packaged and well manufactured. But if you buy a new, complete unit it comes with all kinds of extra , yukky stuff inside.
I don't get it---it must cost the factory more to make all that stuff, and then somehow insert it inside the chicken . Why bother?

[Gyrate]

Chickens are a great invention. You put bugs and corn in one end and eggs come out the other. How cool is that?

[Machine Elf]

Originally Posted by Ken001

Where is it manufactured?

In cow tits.

[Smapti]

You know what I like? Those little baby hot dogs. Do they small down the regular ones, or do they make 'em different?

[DCnDC]

Originally Posted by Smapti

You know what I like? Those little baby hot dogs. Do they small down the regular ones, or do they make 'em different?

I don't know, but they come with this delicious red sauce that it looks like ketchup, it tastes like ketchup, but brother, it ain't ketchup!

[Chimera]

Cheese and yogurt are made from Milk. Which again comes from the mythical "Cow".

[Bill Door]

Originally Posted by Gyrate

Next you'll be telling me that there's a "magic animal" that we get pork, ham AND bacon from.(snip)

And supposedly this magical animal produces sausage as well. Well I've made sausage, and I hope you don't expect me to believe that a hooved animal can stuff sausage casings. They just don't have the dexterity or the patience. Someone is pulling our legs.

[Kimballkid]

And you know what this "cow" also produces? Hamburgers!!

Yep, that's one versatile mythical beast alright.

[SubaRhubarb]

Originally Posted by Smapti

You know what I like? Those little baby hot dogs. Do they small down the regular ones, or do they make 'em different?

You see, when a mommy and daddy hot dog love each other very much....

[One And Only Wanderers]

Originally Posted by SubaRhubarb

You see, when a mommy and daddy hot dog love each other very much....

someone jumps out and chops off daddy hot dog's "wiener" and there you have your smaller version.

[Michael63129]

The first thing I thought of when I saw this thread was that it was a joke, but then I thought of what I have heard about people who really think that all food comes from factories; e.g., vegetables are made out of some kind of paste in a factory.

[kenobi 65]

From a D&D game I was told about:

Monster: Where cheese come from?
Human: It comes from cows.
Monster: But, when me kill cow, me no see cheese.

[Sally Mander]

Originally Posted by Kimballkid

And you know what this "cow" also produces? Hamburgers!!

Yep, that's one versatile mythical beast alright.

No, hamburgers come from McDonald's.

[robert_columbia]

Originally Posted by Huvudtvätt

Is this a Whoosh?

The milk comes from animals called "cows". They live at places called "Farms". The owner of the farm ("Farmer") sells the milk to a "Dairy" or "Milk processing plant" where it is processed and packaged. (Sometimes these plants are owned by farmers' collectives). The plastic-coated paper boxes was an invention by the company Tetra-pak.

This. I've seen cows being milked. The result is milk, and I think you could drink it straight, but I believe it is later processed to help preserve it and to reduce fat. That could happen at a plant outside the farm. Then you get what you see at the grocery store.

[Kimballkid]

Depending on what the cow was fed, fresh from the tap, as it were, can taste really good or really nasty.

[Michael63129]

Originally Posted by Sally Mander

No, hamburgers come from McDonald's.

The last time I had a hamburger, it was made from this pinkish stuff called "ground beef" (turns brown when cooked), which presumably comes from beef.

PS: When I was little, I once called hamburger "hambooger", which sounds unappetizing to say the least.

[Chimera]

Let's not even get started on where Leather comes from.

[Kimballkid]

The Leather Factory!

[Really Not All That Bright]

Originally Posted by robert_columbia

This. I've seen cows being milked. The result is milk, and I think you could drink it straight, but I believe it is later processed to help preserve it and to reduce fat. That could happen at a plant outside the farm. Then you get what you see at the grocery store.

Since we're in GQ: milk processing typically occurs in three stages, pasteurization, (micro)filtering, and homogenization.

Pasteurization is heating the milk to kill nasties and extend its shelf life. Filtering removes any remaining nasties. Homogenization (forcing the milk through bottlenecks at high pressure) breaks down the fat globules and increases the length of time it takes for the milk to come out of emulsion (separate into cream/fat and watery stuff, basically).

[R. P. McMurphy]

Originally Posted by robert_columbia

This. I've seen cows being milked. The result is milk, and I think you could drink it straight, but I believe it is later processed to help preserve it and to reduce fat. That could happen at a plant outside the farm. Then you get what you see at the grocery store.

Most dairy farms pasteurize (heat it to kill bacteria) the milk at the farm before it is transported to the diary for processing and packaging.

So it goes from the farm to places like Londonderry, Derry, NH, or anyplace else named Derry or dairy. Also, that's why cows are put out to pasture. It's lets them know what's coming. If it's hot enough outdoors the milk has already been pasteurized before it has it's tits yanked.

[Nars Glinley]

Originally Posted by Ken001

Milk for most of the OECD consumers arrives in wax-coated boxes or plastic bottles. Where is it manufactured? Do you children know?

Nipples. You can milk anything with nipples.

[Really Not All That Bright]

I have nipples. Could you milk me?

[Chimera]

Yes. Yes we can.

[Hello Again]

Originally Posted by Really Not All That Bright

Pasteurization is heating the milk to kill nasties and extend its shelf life. Filtering removes any remaining nasties. Homogenization (forcing the milk through bottlenecks at high pressure) breaks down the fat globules and increases the length of time it takes for the milk to come out of emulsion (separate into cream/fat and watery stuff, basically).

As kids, we had a book about Louise Pasteur, so naturally we wanted to know who Mr. Homogen was.

[Nars Glinley]

Originally Posted by Chimera

Yes. Yes we can.

There's usually an additional charge for that.

[TriPolar]

Chocolate milk comes from brown cows.

[Michael63129]

Originally Posted by Really Not All That Bright

Since we're in GQ: milk processing typically occurs in three stages, pasteurization, (micro)filtering, and homogenization.

Pasteurization is heating the milk to kill nasties and extend its shelf life. Filtering removes any remaining nasties. Homogenization (forcing the milk through bottlenecks at high pressure) breaks down the fat globules and increases the length of time it takes for the milk to come out of emulsion (separate into cream/fat and watery stuff, basically).

That's not the only reason for homogenization; milk from different cows will have different levels of fats, proteins and sugars; homogenization ensures that you always have the same mix of nutrients in it, somewhat like buying meat that has a given percentage of fat (except I presume that here it is done by selecting cuts of meat, or for ground meat, adding fat/lean meat, the latter being closer to what is done with milk).

[PatriotGrrrl]

Originally Posted by Nars Glinley

Nipples. You can milk anything with nipples.

So almonds, coconuts, and soys have nipples? Who knew!

[Michael63129]

Originally Posted by TriPolar

Chocolate milk comes from brown cows.

No, that's what happens when you milk chocolate, hence chocolate milk. Just like cow milk or human milk.

[August West]

Chocolate has nipples?

[Really Not All That Bright]

Yeah, but I wouldn't google them at work.

[Kimballkid]

Sure it does, just look at a Hershey's Kiss.

ETA: Response to August West.

[Gyrate]

Originally Posted by Sally Mander

No, hamburgers come from McDonald's.

Oh the cow in the meadow goes moo
Oh the cow in the meadow goes moo
Then the farmer hits it on the head with a hammer
And that's how we get hamburger!

Nooooooow...chickens!

[fiddlesticks]

I'm old enough to remember when Saddam said the US bombed a baby milk factory in the first Gulf War. Kinda odd to draw attention to a place where infants were milked, I thought.

[Machine Elf]

Originally Posted by Smapti

You know what I like? Those little baby hot dogs. Do they small down the regular ones, or do they make 'em different?

They take full-size hot dogs and turn 'em down on a lathe.

[tdn]

The idea that milk comes from farms is bullshit. I've been to a farm. I never once saw any milk carton plants.

[SeldomSeen]

How is babby cow formed??

[cochrane]

I never saw a purple cow.
I never hope to see one.
But from the milk we're getting now,
I'm certain there must be one.

[gazpacho]

Originally Posted by Huvudtvätt

Is this a Whoosh?

The milk comes from animals called "cows". They live at places called "Farms". The owner of the farm ("Farmer") sells the milk to a "Dairy" or "Milk processing plant" where it is processed and packaged. (Sometimes these plants are owned by farmers' collectives). The plastic-coated paper boxes was an invention by the company Tetra-pak.

Do you have a cite for Tetra inventing the milk carton. I see competing things on the internet saying the US style milk carton being invented by in the US in 1906 by G. W, Maxwell or in 1915 by John Van Wormer.

The US style Milk carton looks different from the four sided carton that I think of as a tetra-pak. Wiki seems to think that the four sided tetra pak was invented around 1950.

[Darth Panda]

Originally Posted by tdn

The idea that milk comes from farms is bullshit. I've been to a farm. I never once saw any milk carton plants.

Well, they don't grow on trees.

[tdn]

Originally Posted by Darth Panda

Well, they don't grow on trees.

Neither do pineapples, but you never see anyone pulling on a cow's teet and getting a pineapple.

[TriPolar]

Originally Posted by tdn

Neither do pineapples, but you never see anyone pulling on a cow's teet and getting a pineapple.

They don't? I thought pineapples grew on pine trees.

[tdn]

Originally Posted by TriPolar

They don't? I thought pineapples grew on pine trees.

No, that's where we get Pine-sol.

[Little Nemo]

Originally Posted by TriPolar

Chocolate milk comes from brown cows.

I recently read about a grandfather who had a dairy farm and convinced his visiting grandchildren this was true. He secretly added some chocolate powder to the bottom of a pail and then let the children watch him milk a brown cow into the pail. And sure enough, the pail filled up with chocolate milk, which the kids got to drink.

The letter I read was from one of the now-adult grandchildren, who admits he believed for years afterwards that it was possible to get chocolate milk from a cow - he had, after all, personally witnessed it happen.