You think it will never happen to you as a parent and you go about daily life without a pause.
Then, your 7 year old daughter suddenly enters the house and says that a guy (who already looks a bit shifted) made an inappropriate whistle call when she wanted to walk down the street to see her friend. She quickly turned around and came back.
Upon questioning by my wife, she also said the once he creeped her out by telling her something to the effect of would you be my girlfriend while she was playing outside.
That’s where I turn 180 degrees and realize we might have a problem with this guy who is renting a basement appt. - 3rd house fro mine - in a row of otherwise average looking suburb neighbourhood houses.
So, I go out to see where he is and there he is, next to his truck, looking right back at me. As I said, he’s a bit shifted so his gaze looks very unpredictable.
Ok, I come back in the house and make a non-emergency call to police and still waiting for the police to show up.
It all started about 30 minutes or so.
What to expect from police? Remember, this is Canada and public does not have access to sex offender registry. Also, I don’t want to go to work downtown Toronto tomorrow as I begin to really worry about this guy.
Ugh, what a disturbing event. I’d talk to the police in your home but then go with them when they question him. He needs to understand that this is unacceptable anytime, including after the police have gone. I’d also talk to ALL the neighbors, those with kids and anyone else that can help keep an eye on this creep. I’m so sorry y’all are having to go through this.
Let us know what happens - but I agree with the above who say that you go over with the police. I also agree that you let all of the neighbors know what’s going on and that you create a centralized “call center” where neighbors can report anything inappropriate that you can then pass on to the police with future calls. Let him know that he’s not welcome so hopefully a) his rent will skyrocket and b) he’ll move.
If the police don’t do anything (other than speak to him, which I suspect is all they can reasonably be expected to do), I’d probably be moved to write a letter detailing what happened and hand one out to each neighbor.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not big on how sex offenders in America get this type of with hunt treatment either, but in this case, this dude is actively weirding out kids. Fortunately he hasn’t done anything, unfortunately, because he hasn’t done anything, he’s going to stay. So, put everyone else on notice.
Hopefully just a visit from the police will make him uncomfortable enough to stop the creepiness. If you fear that things will escalate, keep notes of dates, times, episodes. I had to do this with a neighbor a few years ago, but after cutting off all contact with her, she moved on. Thank goodness!
Update – Two police officers came by at around 9:30pm and we talked on my porch. My wife also came to talk. I repeated the story but at the same time police officer noticed that I’m thinking this thru too much as I was worried at how this guy will react. One police officer was confirming that I did the right thing as these things need to be nipped in the bud and he essentially confirmed that a strange looking dude in only his underwear-boxers should not be making a catcall to a 7 year old on the street, period…
Then they went over to talk to him for about 15 minutes.
Afterwards, same police officer did not want to come back to our house as this guy was still on his porch so the officer called me at the phone from his car. His assessment is that the guy is a bit strange but not stupid; according to the officer, the guy was trying to make it look like a playful thing (even the bit about telling my daughter if she would like to be his girlfriend). To this, police officer responded by telling him such behavior is highly inappropriate - especially since this guy doesn’t know the girl’s parents. Finally, officer “read him riot act” and they left.
Sounds like a textbook case. Hopefully, that’s it but you never know.
However, next week will be critical to see what the dynamic will be as I’ll be approaching neighbors with little kids and tell them about it over the coming days.
/* p.s. Must say, very impressed by the professionalism of two officers representing Peel Regional Police
What’s gonna suck is if a real predator passes through the hood, bones a child, and scampers off. Mr. Underpants (who might be a harmless dude with really poor social judgment) will get burnt at the stake.
Knowing nothing else about him I have to wonder if someone who stands around in their undies whistling at children has it together enough to also be a predator who hasn’t yet been caught & tagged. Or maybe he’s the next famous serial killer just looking for victim #1. Dunno.
Please do mention the incident to the family he’s renting from. If he’s a stranger, they have a right to kick the scurvy cur out. Or maybe he’s family, in which case they can just beat the shit out of him. Either way, you win!
