Freemasons Rule the World!!

[Tuckerfan]

Along with their gay Jewish alien buddies, I'm sure. For about two years now there's been a sign on the main drag into town which reads something like, "Break the TVA! Support Solar Panels and Geothermal! Leadership by Example!" Rather bizarre, especially since there's no explaination as to who put the sign up, until recently. A pick up has appeared in town with a sign identical to that standing in the bed, along with "Vote for [name ommitted because I can't remember it] Governor!" plastered on it. Okay, now we know who you are. Now, though, he's added another sign. I don't remember what it said exactly (Mainly because I was so stunned by the stupidity of it that I almost slammed into the car in front of me which had abruptly stopped.) but the gist of it was, "Destroy the power of the secret Masonic handshake!" Huh? Masons rule the world? Is that so? And by becoming governor you're going to change this, how?

Let me explain something to you, pal. If Freemasons do control everything there's fuck lot I can do about it!!! If they're so goddamn powerful, than anything you might possibly be able to do to thwart them ain't gonna work! Why? Because they already control everything!!! So, that means even if you were to get a majority of the vote, you'd never hear about it. Why? Because they control the reporting of the election results! So you haven't got a shot!

Oh, I know, you could alert everyone to their evil ways and throw them out of power with a popular uprising! Unless, of course, their gay Jewish alien buddies have given them a mind control ray! Then you're doomed! And seeing as how most people don't agree with you, I think that you're right. Hmm. Maybe you should start handing out tinfoil hats!!!

I love conspiracy types, really, I do. I mean, if the bad guys are as powerful as the conspiracy lovers claim, there's really not shit we can do about it! They'll either cover-up the evidence so deeply that you won't be able to find it, or they'll take out anyone who tries to stop them.

Altogether now, let's sing the Stonecutter song!

Who controls the British Pound?
Who keeps the Metric System down?
We do, we do...

[waterj2]

It's "British crown" I believe, rhymes better that way.

[LindyHopper]

Say, you don't suppose this candidate guy has seen From Hell a few too many times, do you?

[Eternal]

Everyone knows that the Freemasons are just a clever diversion from the real organization.

FNORD

[Tuckerfan]

Originally posted by Eternal
Everyone knows that the Freemasons are just a clever diversion from the real organization.

FNORD

Who? The Knight of Columbus?

[LindyHopper]

The Rosicrucians?

[DPWhite]

What a crock! I'm not a freemason, but I know some of them, and they are harmless fraternities that do charitable work, kinda like Lions and Elks and such, but with a little more ceremony. They have very little to no political power and aren't interested in it either.

[tiny ham]

Let's get Hiryuu in here....stat!

[matt_mcl]

The Secret and Ancient Order of Weird Gay Canucks?

[Trion]

Originally posted by DPWhite
What a crock! I'm not a freemason, but I know some of them, and they are harmless fraternities that do charitable work, kinda like Lions and Elks and such, but with a little more ceremony. They have very little to no political power and aren't interested in it either.

...which is exactly what they want you to think.

[SisterCoyote]

Well, I'm sure my Grandfather (now deceased, Mason), Grandmother (Eastern Star), Uncle (DeMolay, don't believe he ever joined the Masons) and Mother (Job's Daughters) will be very surprised to find they're running anything.

Well, except my mother. It's all about her anyway.

FNORD.

[RainbowDragon]

Hmmm I always wondered what the G symbol was in the middle of the Masonic seal.
As Tuckerfan described it must be “Geothermal”. I see the connection now!

[CrankyAsAnOldMan]

I'd be careful. Reveal too many of their secrets in this thread, and they will find you. And kill you. They are everywhere, and they can find you.

I mean, if they can make Steve Guttenburg a star....

[racinchikki]

Freemasons don't rule the world.

I do.

[John Corrado]

The Freemasons *would* rule the US Government, but they rolled a twelve, which is automatic failure no matter how much money the UFOs were throwing behind it. Luckily, the Assassins quickly used Punk Rockers to control the Republican Party, and some semblance of balance was achieved.

[Ferrous]

And now the Gnomes of Zurich have you right where they want you...

[Tyklfe]

Originally posted by DPWhite
What a crock! I'm not a freemason, but I know some of them, and they are harmless fraternities that do charitable work, kinda like Lions and Elks and such, but with a little more ceremony. They have very little to no political power and aren't interested in it either.

I'm afraid that you're misled -

David Lee Hobson U. S. Congressman
Stanley Paul Meyer President, Columbia Realty Group

Therman Eugene Riggs
Retired U.S. Navy

Robert Sherman Callahan
President Victory Railway Company

J. Edgar Hoover
Director of the FBI

Buzz Aldrin
American Astronaut

Harry S. Truman
President of the United States

John Wayne
Movie Actor

Simcoe, Lord John Graves.
First Lieutenant Governor of Upper Canada

Warren Harding
President of the United States

Ben Franklin (not 33 degree)
American inventor and Statesman

Barham, Eugene A.
American Admiral and war hero

This list goes on and on
Btw - my grandfather just reciently died, but before his death he was elected to become a 33 degree Mason, from the Scottish Rite

[Tyklfe]

Also the bible that the President of the U.S. is sworn in on every year is owned by the masons.

[Tyklfe]

Oh, one more thing about the list I posted above - all the people in that list were or are 33 degree Masons.

The 33 Degree being the highest rank a Mason can attain.

[Shyabrick]

My father is a Shriner, my brother is a 33 degree Mason, my sister a Job's daughter. None of them are interested in ruling anything but if they were we'd be in good hands. They are all good people.

[Creaky]

My great-grandfather was a Mason, as was my Great Uncle George (33rd degree). My girl cousins and great aunties were Eastern Star. I was a Jobie.

Fear us and our Legacy of Control!

(Nah, nothing to fear really. We're harmless. Odd maybe, but quite harmless.)

[Hemlock]

I laughed when I was approached and asked if I would like to join.

I felt almost insulted. All the masons I've ever come across had one thing in common: mediocrity. None of them had reached the top level in his field. They were all a few rungs down from the top of the ladder and were all rather forgettable. They weren't insiders in real life.

Make that two things in common: they were also all perfectly decent (yawn) people.

[Typo Negative]

Originally posted by Hemlock
I felt almost insulted. All the masons I've ever come across had one thing in common: mediocrity. None of them had reached the top level in his field. They were all a few rungs down from the top of the ladder and were all rather forgettable.

Open your eyes, man! It's because they've got world domination on their hands and a low profile to maintain!

[Eternal]

The Mason organization, like any other organization, has its agendas, and its no suprise that political power is one of them. But that doesn't mean that the lower members of the organization know about it.

[Monty]

Hemlock: I have to say that I doubt very seriously your story about being asked to join the Masons. The Masons don't ask folks to join; the deal is a prospective applicant must inquire of a Mason if he may join their organization.

Tyklfe: Your two "points" gave me a great laught htis morning! First: Do you have any proof that the Bible used by every single President of the United States during inauguration is the very same book or do you expect us to take it as fact because you posted it as though it is fact? Second: Are you not confusing the idea of an individual who owns something with the concept of the organization to which that individual may belong owning something? Third: Why didn't you just go ahead and post the entire crackpot conspiracy theory instead of just a tidbit or two?

Eternal: The adjective form is "Masonic." Other than that, my query about conspiracy theory to Tyklfe applies to you in regards to the political agenda you postulate.

[Duck Duck Goose]

Ah. Bibles and the Inauguration.

To summarize:
1. The St. John Masonic Lodge #1 does own the "original" Bible.
2. Each President-elect gets to choose what Bible is used.
3. The "Masonic" Bible hasn't been used that often.
4. Sometimes no Bible is used at all.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/wor...00/1125080.stm

When [George Washington] was first sworn into office, there was a scramble to find a bible after the chief justice of the New York state judiciary determined that an oath without a bible would lack legitimacy.

But none could be found in Federal Hall in New York City where the first swearing in was held. A bible had to be borrowed from a Masonic lodge a few blocks away.

http://abcnews.go.com/sections/polit...AL_arcana.html

As he takes the oath of office, George W. Bush will place his left hand upon the same bible his father, President George Bush, used while being sworn into office in 1989.

Bush will use the King James version of the bible, resting his hand on an edition printed in 1767 and provided by the St. John's Lodge of New York.

It is, in fact, the exact same bible used by a number of presidents while taking office, including George Washington in 1793. Among the other chief executives sworn in on it: Warren Harding, Dwight Eisenhower and Jimmy Carter.

http://www.freep.com/news/inaug/platform/plat3.htm

First to use two Bibles at the swearing-in -- one his personal Bible, the second a Gutenberg Bible, Harry Truman, 1949

http://www.webpresidentsusa.com/AP060413.htm

Who was the only president to say the oath using a law book instead of the Bible? Franklin Pierce

http://clinton4.nara.gov/WH/Family/h...ation1997.html

Surrounded by members of Congress, Justices of the Supreme Court, dignitaries, family and friends, the President stood ne[x]t to his daughter, Chelsea, and rested his left hand on a family Bible held by Mrs. Clinton.

http://www.webpresidentsusa.com/AP0601.htm

Is the presence or use of a Bible required by law? If an atheist were elected President of the United States, would he be required to swear on a Bible?

Reply: The Bible is not required by law. Rutherford B. Hayes' private swearing in was conducted without a Bible [BLSWH 42], as was Theodore Roosevelt's first swearing in.

http://members.tripod.com/~candst/tnppage/arg11.htm

Nothing in this section requires that the oath of office be taken on the Bible. Neither do the words "so help me God" appear in the oath. While Presidents often include this phrase in their inauguration ceremonies, the words are customary; they are not required by the Constitution and have no legal significance.

Presidents and other federal officials may swear on the Bible and say the words "so help me God," but this does not make the Constitution any less secular. The Constitution requires nothing of federal officers in the way of religion. The framers saw no need to refer to God in the oath of office, and explicitly provided an alternative to the oath that guaranteed secularity.

And, er, I might point out that the President of the United States is not sworn in "every year", but "every four years". Minor nitpick, I know.

And it's not necessarily on "the Masonic Bible". Another nifty conspiracy theory, right down the drain. Sorry, guys.

[jabe]

All you non-believers better watch out.

I know how to perform frontal lobotomies and I'm not afraid to use them.



peace,
JB

[Derleth]

Illuminati! ILLUMINATI, I TELL YOU!

Hail Eris!

[Ferrous]

All hail Discordia!

[k.os]

T.A.N.S.T.A.G.I.

[erislover]

FUCKUP is extremely troubled that Hiyruu has not entered the thread yet.

[Hemlock]

Originally posted by Monty
Hemlock: I have to say that I doubt very seriously your story about being asked to join the Masons. The Masons don't ask folks to join; the deal is a prospective applicant must inquire of a Mason if he may join their organization.

Well, here in Hong Kong they do. Apparently they have something of a recruitment problem. It wasn't "we want you" so much as an oblique "have you ever thought of joining?" from someone I know pretty well.

I think the masons here are British-style. They don't have the 33rd degree or any of that. Nor, from what I gather, do they involve wives and kids in their activities at all.

[Dewey Cheatem Undhow]

The OP is mis-stated.

It should read "Freemasons Rule the Parade!!

Damn if those Shriners in their little cars don't steal the show every time.

[k.os]

It's all GRUAD's fault.

Ewige Blumenkraft!
Ewige Schlangekraft!

[chuckster]

I'm surprised to hear that Masons who are elected President swear on the Bible at all. After all, everyone knows the Masons are in league with the Devil in their plot to take over the world.

[The Mad Hermit]

Slight hijack:

John Corrado, since no one else seemed to get your joke as far as I could see, I just wanted to let you know...



It's been a long time since I've played the game. I wonder if there is an online version?

[The Tim]

[b]Steelerphan[\b] there isn't an online version, at least not officially, but I'm sure that us dopers can figure out something. Let me go do something about that in MPSIMS.

[reprise]

I've just read a review for a book called Them : Adventures With Extremists written by British writer and documentary maker Jon Ronson. The book sounds very funny and entertaining - can't wait to get hold of a copy; sadly it seems to have overlooked the Freemasonry conspiracists.

[Neurotik]

I've read that book, reprise, it's pretty good. However, it becomes less and less skeptical with them as the book goes on for a variety of reasons. And it also shows the weirdness of some legitimate organizations that try and oppose the extremists. Very good read.

[A Monkey With a Gun]

Originally posted by Tyklfe
Oh, one more thing about the list I posted above - all the people in that list were or are 33 degree Masons.

The 33 Degree being the highest rank a Mason can attain.

33? Dammit, I knew something was up with that number. John Cage came out with that "musical" piece 4'33". It is four minutes and 33 seconds of silence. Just silence, and he calls it music. Obviously, he is fucking with my head on behalf of the Masons and the title is a pun meaning "for 33". Pure Evil. Speaking of titles, Title 33 of the US code regards navigable waters. The MASONS CONTROL THE SHIPPING LANES! And water has special signifigance to the Free masons, ever drink Rolling Rock? It's watered down swill with a special "33" printed on every bottle. It's an evil Masonic plot to desroy our beer.

I'm on to 'em.

[LurkMeister]

To: Grand High Pooh-Bah
From: Agent LurkMeister
Re: Conspiracy Uncovered

This is to notify you that the SD'er known as Beeblebrox is dangerously close to uncovering part of our plot to keep America from ever producing drinkable beer. Fortunately, he has mistakenly attributed it to the Freemasons, but it is still suggested that he be put under observation lest he come closer to the truth.
In fact, all participants in this thread should be watched carefully in case their accidental exposure to this small portion of our plot should lead to further discoveries.

[Hamish]

Well, Mason-conspiracy theories have been around since at least the late 18th Century. I think it was partly the fault of the American Revolution -- several of US's founding fathers were Freemasons, they were also revolutionaries, and so to the terrified elites of Europe looking for someone to blame, Freemasonry made an excellent scapegoat.

And it's always possible there was a connection. Freemason Lodges could have offered a chance to discuss radical ideas free from intrusive supervision. And I notice looking over Tykfle's list that the radical reformers are limited to the 18th-century (Lord Simcoe and Ben Franklin). So maybe Freemasonry once offered an oasis of free thought, but I doubt it does now.

My Wiccan group was once allowed into some parts of Freemason temple to perform a Samhain ritual. My observation is that there probably wasn't a Mason there under the age of 65, and that all of them had missed the last fifty years of social evolution. It was a little bubble of the 1950's.

So I doubt they're running the world -- but if they are, we're all in deep trouble

I hope they are running the world of architecture, though, because the inside of the Temple was amazing. They had these brass bas-relief elevator doors -- a sculpture of a cobra curled around a ship, with a book in the picture. That image has haunted my dreams ever since. It's a shame they keep that stuff for themselves.

[swampbear]

Originally Posted By matt_mcl:
The Secret and Ancient Order of Weird Gay Canucks?

If I emigrate to Canada and become a citizen can I join? Please, please, please, please let me join! I'm already weird and gay. I can learn to do Canadian stuff. Oh, I so wanna join!

[belladonna]

I can't believe no one's linked to this yet. Chick on Masons.

You're eeeeeeeeeviiilllll, didn't you know!?

bella

[Wolfian]

Wasn't there a thread a few months back which featured a Doper who claimed to be constantly, though indirectly, asked to join to Masons? I think that same Doper claimed that since both Bin Laden and Bush were Masons Bush wasn't trying his hardest to find him. I might be combining two threads...

[Gary Kumquat]

Originally posted by Monty
Hemlock: I have to say that I doubt very seriously your story about being asked to join the Masons. The Masons don't ask folks to join; the deal is a prospective applicant must inquire of a Mason if he may join their organization.

That surprises me. I've been asked if I'd be interested in joining the masons on two different occasions now.

Are you sure they don't do special offers - get a friend to join, and receive $100 worth of vouchers?

[TalkingHead]

I'm afraid to post here because I lost my tin foil cap, and I *had* to buy some Proctor and Gamble products the other day, not to mention that I keep hearing "clicks" on the phone ever since I mentioned the Trilateral Commission and Bilderbergers in the same sentence the other day. It was actually ok, until got my smart card out it got near my cell phone which let them know where I was... then the green light come in through the windows and...

[jesuslynch]

Originally posted by belladonna
I can't believe no one's linked to this yet. Chick on Masons....

I eat lunch at the Albert Pike Hotel at least once a week!

_{I have to walk past The Albert Pike Grand Lodge to get there.}

OG help me!

[LouisB]

There are people who might wish to become a Mason, but don't know what steps to take. There are people who would be good candidates for Masonry, but who haven't thought about joining. It is acceptable and permissable for a Mason to make an oblique approach to such people: "Have you ever thought about joining?" is just such an approach. Interestingly, people who are approached in such a way are usually exemplifying Masonic principles without being aware of doing so. And, usually, such an approach is made only after the matter has been discussed among the Brethren. The Masonic Fraternity DOES need new members and the standards for admission are fairly high---if a person has been approached in an oblique way, he has been accorded an honor, even if he isn't appreciative of it.

[Tuckerfan]

LouisB, it's funny you should say that. My father's a Mason and my grandfather was one as well. At my grandfather's funeral, there were Masons who performed a memorial service. I got to talking to one of them afterwards. The conversation seemed to go fine, until he asked my age, once I told him, he abruptly walked off. I have no idea what it was about my age that caused him to leave, but leave he did.