After a long overdue installation of anti-spyware software, I found an uninspired 1,034 possible spywares. This was both expected, owing to years and years of IE use before installing Mozilla, and disapointing, seeing how I would of hoped for more.
So, when you first installed AdAware, how much crap was really built up on your system? Perhaps the winner will recieve a free copy of Xupiter to really test out those new-found skills or something.
I’m a tech for a living and fix computers on the side. The record so far is over 9,000. This was on a computer in a halfway house. It was a huge mess.
Slee
Why just last week I got 917 hits on my parents’ computer. My friend claims to have reached four or five thousand, if memory serves, so I’ll just drop that in on his behalf.
2,995 hits on my aunt’s PC which I spent far too long fixing over Christmas. Turns out running in safe mode is the clincher. Man, I hate CoolWebSearch.
Also, while I can’t remember the number of hits, but I do remember working out that my flatmate’s laptop was at least 5% spyware the last time I cleared it out for him.
Over 2,200
My work computer had over 3000 according to the tech who ran the spyware-catching program.
I was the lone person in my company who still used a dial-up because VPN I was using didn’t play nice with our firewall. They made this discovery when they finally were able to make the switch so I could get rid of my modem.
I had one person who regularly had 400+ show up in ad-aware, and I visited every month or so. Since then, I had another customer with 550. No anti-virus, and several versions of a very popular P2P program. I shudder to think what kind of viruses she had.
Almost 6,000 on my in-laws’ PC.
Zero. 
A certain Cecil Adams had 1,690 critical objects on his PC.
The largest number of instances of spyware found on my computer at the same time is three. That’s what AdAware found on its first scan, hidden in the registry. I block all cookies except for those I absolutely need, and pop-ups. After I’ve been to a new website I look in the cookies list and delete any that weren’t there before I started, and block them from reappearing. Works fine for me!
Describing yourself again?
I hit over 1600 today checking out a computer for an SP2 upgrade. And that was a faculty machine. I don’t work with student computers, but I suspect that’s nowhere near the record.
Don’t be jealous. 
<Strong Bad>
That is not a small number!
</Strong Bad>
Jealous of a self-proclaimed zero? You gotta be kidding.