I’m perfectly ok knowing that I can do most of the things on that list, plus many more that aren’t listed. I’m also perfectly ok with the things I haven’t done and probably never will.
Oh yeah? Well I learned to clean a rifle in 3rd grade and navigate in 4th. In 5th grade I killed a grizzly bear with a slide-rule, bloodied it up so I computed our reentry vector using a slice of apple pie and a Mickey Mouse watch.
Real men don’t get stranded because they can use a map and compass.
pssst. The frame a wall joke was alluded to in Post 10, and explained in Post 45.
Huh. I’m way off it seems. And I probably get negative points for seeing the subject title and thinking it was going to be a list of etiquette or sartorial related things, like how to tie a necktie.
Definite Yes
2. Protect your computer
5. Retouch digital photos
11. Sharpen a knife
15. Get a car unstuck
16. Back up data
17. Paint a room
21. Hook up an HDTV
25. Extend your wireless network
Qualified Yes
7. Build a campfire. Unless you mean by rubbing two sticks together or with a piece of flint.
12. Perform CPR. I did learn CPR and got a certificate for it, but that was almost 25 years ago.
14. Maneuver a car out of a skid. I’ve read on the technique, but I have not skidded my car since reading about it. (I did fishtail and hydroplane twice in my first year of driving, which prompted me to (a) get new tires and (b) read up on emergency driving). “Steer in the direction of the skid” is pretty much all I remember now, though.
20. Change oil and filter. I’ve done this because my Dad said I should learn how (along with swapping in the spare tire/donut). I’ve done the latter “in the field” a few times now with various cars, including helping strangers do it at the side of the road, but when I can pay $25 and wait 15-30 minutes to have it done and get my car washed in the process, and I’d have to go to a facility of some kind to drop off the oil for recycling anyway, what’s the point of doing it myself?
23. Paddle a canoe. OK I’ve been in a canoe, been given a paddle, and thereupon proceeded to paddle like the other person did, by alternating sides. What’s the big deal?
24. Fix a bike flat. Are we talking about using a piece of duct tape that holds until I can get it to the shop? I’ve done that…
Qualified No
- Patch a radiator hose. On the other hand, while I couldn’t identify the “radiator hose” under the hood of a car, I’m pretty sure I could look it up the manual and apply generic hose-patching skills.
- Fix a dead outlet. Well it depends on what’s wrong with it, eh? Still, I’m pretty sure I figure out how to swap in a new outlet box, but I’ve never had to do it.
- Navigate with a map and compass. Never had to do this. I have some vague recollection of receiving some instruction on this in the Cub Scouts, but that’s all.
- Use a torque wrench. I’ve used various kinds of wrenches but don’t remember this one by name, unless it’s one of those “I know it when I see it” types of wrenches.
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Mix concrete. Never had to do this and not sure why I would have to either. Still, how hard could it be? Add water, stir, pour and trowel, write name, let set…?
Definitely No - Rescue a boater who has capsized. I can swim, barely, but learned enough in swimming class NOT to try to rescue someone unless trained to do so, as the most likely outcome is to have the drowner take me down with him.
- Back up a trailer. I’ve driven a U-Haul truck but that’s about it.
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Clean a bolt-action rifle. Er… Why? Is this list from Popular Mechanics or Guns and Ammo or a hunting magazine?
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Fillet a fish. I’ve never been fishing. Well one time when I was 12 a friend let me try to cast his line off a pier, and I threw his whole pole into Long Island Sound, and the near-fatal embarrassment was enough. How hard is it to clean/fillet a fish?
Wha-a? - Frame a wall. I thought picture frames went ON walls. Dunno what this means otherwise.
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Bleed brakes. You mean, drain brake fluid?
To frame a wall is to build a wall, usually from lumber.
I think you’ve got to know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em
As others have pointed out, it is a silly list, but here’s what I can / cannot do.
- Patch a radiator hose --> Never had to, but I’d try duct tape.
- Protect your computer --> Yup. Got that security software installed.
- Rescue a boater who as capsized --> Check. Eagle scout here.
- Frame a wall --> Done that one too.
- Retouch digital photos --> Only if it’s a picture of a really beautiful woman, then I’ll keep fingering them all night. Actually haven’t played around with this.
- Back up a trailer --> We had a boat.
- Build a campfire --> Scout thing again. And damn good on this one.
- Fix a dead outlet --> Done that.
- Navigate with a map and compass --> Scouting
- Use a torque wrench --> My dad did his own car work. Course this was before cars were all computerized… .
- Sharpen a knife --> Anyone who cooks as got to do this.
- Perform CPR --> Scouting again, plus refresher courses.
- Fillet a fish --> Cooking in Japan. It would be like living in Texas and not knowing how to BBQ.
- Maneuver a car out of a skid --> Grew up in Salt Lake. Welcome to winter.
- Get a car unstuck --> Grew up in Salt Lake. Welcome to winter.
- Back up data --> Can you breath?
- Paint a room --> Done that.
- Mix concrete --> Done that
- Clean a bolt-action rifle --> The right-wing nut brother-in-law from Texas showed me that one.
- Change oil and filter --> Check
- Hook up an HDTV --> The 42" plasma looks nice.
- Bleed brakes --> I bleed blood so that’s going to be tough. I’ve done it before (see above) but it’s been years. Actually, the last thing I bled was an AC unit.
- Paddle a canoe -->This list is biased towards scouts.
- Fix a bike flat -->Check
- Extend your wireless network --> To where? Have you seen the size of Japanese apartments?
Two no’s and one maybe.
Man? Or do only the women get graded on curves?
I can’t do most of the things on that list, although I could probably figure some of them out. I’m a woman. So does that mean that I shouldn’t learn how to do these things, since my handsome husband will do them all for me? That’s just silly.
In all fairness, probably the women who say they don’t cook don’t actually mean they don’t know how. I, for example, often say that I don’t cook, meaning that I don’t cook gourmet meals or put much effort into cooking. I know how to cook, I just don’t always have time to make a really nice meal.
Every man should be able to survive in the wilderness alone with very little and for quite awhile. Everything else on that list is just these skills modern equivalents.
What about weaseling out of things? Shouldn’t that be on the list? 
Here’s 10 that should be added, preferably replacing any terms in the original list which involve heavy lifting.
- Make a shiv in prison
- Sucking out snake venom
- Wear a Tux and look GOOD in it
- Negotiating a darkened living room at 2 in the morning when drop down drunk
- Knowing what to do when shooting the hostage is NOT an option, and doing it
- Zombie Combat
- Pulling a stingray barb out of your chest
- Swaggering
- Internalize rage
- own, operate and maintain a successful penis.
I’ll tell you, the work force is quite a jungle.
Here’s a crack at one, in no particular order:
-
Attract and enrapture a sexual partner;
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Feed, clean, protect, entertain and educate an infant, then a toddler, and then a small child; Following that, discipline, educate and instill values in an older child/teenager; Following that, ability to establish a positive relationship with an adult who was one a child under your care;
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Ability to participate in artistic and cultural activities beyond merely appreciating the work of others;
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Obtain and keep a paying job;
-
Deal wisely and well with money;
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Avoid crippling adddictions, and keep self in good shape and health;
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Ability to learn to use tools and operate equipment as needed;
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Know what to do when lost or facing violence, or a health or other emergency, and have the presence of mind to do it;
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Ability to deal with grief and loss, and to help others to deal with grief and loss;
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Ability to make friends, speak in public, and otherwise deal with social situations; and finally
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Develop a sense of self-worth and personal values and honour, and not let self down in this respect.
The list in the OP is way too heavily weighted towards minor tool-using skills. I mean, “use a torque wrench”? WTF? That takes all of five minutes to learn, if that.
A man after my own heart.
I think the list is entirely too computer related and leaves out some important stuff that a man should be able to do that actually makes life worth living.
Everyman should be ablt to tie a bow tie so that when he wears a tuxedo he doesn’t need to wear one of those stupid pre-tied things.
See post 59. (I don’t mean to sound snarky, but I’m not budging. 
)
Can do all of the above.
I think “trap, clean, and cook game, large or small” should be in there somewhere, and I agree that cleaning a bolt-action rifle is not as valuable as shooting one.
Can we make one for women? I’ll start
- Know what to wear to make your breast inexplicably defy gravity
- How to flirt your way out of a traffic ticket
- How to comfort a baby into stop crying
- How to look beautiful but make it look “effortless”
- How to convince a man he’s wrong even when he isn’t
- How to subtly tease another woman into an eating disorder
- How to walk in heels
- How to drive a stick
- How to confidently debate or make a point with a man
- How to tastefully decorate a home/apartment
- How to fight with another woman every week but still consider her your best friend
- How to drink and enjoy beer
feel free to add on to this
Out of the original list, there’s one that’s a waste of time, and two that I’ve never had a need for, but I could figure them out if I ever had to expand a wireless network or retouch digi photos.
Actually patching a radiator hose well enough to hold hot, pressurized coolant for more than a few miles can be done. Nobody carries around the materials needed, though. Duct tape? Nah. It won’t last ten minutes. In a life-or-death situation, you can drive without coolant, but you’ll need a new engine when it’s over.
I can back up a trailer to a CD or a pocket external drive. I can back it up with a truck, but I’m not very good at it.
Yes, I can drive a stick. I also know how to drive a stick of ash wood into a vampire’s heart, but I’ve never done it. I’m not an actor, so I’ll never need to.
I can do the rest of that stuff.
Most of the OP list, I pay other people to do for me. Oh, I’ve done 'em, and I’m pretty damn handy at carpentry, wiring, crap like that. The skidding, backing up, stuff like that, I can do if I have to. But I like **friedo’s ** suggestion. That I’ll do for myself.