3 in 1 Thread; Lending $$$, Revenge, Guilt

I will try to make this quick…I loaned an associate 90 dollars not because I had it to give but because I believed that he was good for the money and would pay it back within a week.
He had just gotten a job but he said that his first paycheck was only for a few days of work so it was small but his next paycheck would be more than enough.
I was convinced that I would only be out of the money for about 7 days.
The day that he was supposed to pay me came and went so he comes by my house and says his bank won’t let him have the money until next week.
Since he had came by on his own and let me know what was going on I was sure that I would have my 90 dollars and possibly a little extra that he had promised.
Anyway days are coming and going, each day I am becoming less and less confident that I would get paid. At first he would give me excuses ranging from his job couldn’t pay him to his mother stole the money from him.
Eventually I never see the guy anymore and I find out from friends that he will not hang out if he knows I am going to be there.
So after that my new rule for myself was “don’t lend money to anyone unless your willing to part with it.”
End Thread One

So I counted the 90 dollars as a very expensive lesson (for me anyway) and I just forgot about it and I didn’t tell this guy he didn’t have to pay me back I just stopped bringing it up when I saw him. I was becoming really angry however when I saw this dude with new shoes, new jeans, new skateboard…new everything. He was talking about how he bought a new audio system for his car that I’m sure must have cost 300 dollars, I knew exactly the system he was talking about so I knew the price. All I could think was I wanted revenge and soon enough I got it in a way. He needed to borrow another 100 dollars from me because his car had gotten towed or impounded and he was short that amount to get it out. He said that he was making a promise on his grandfather’s grave to pay me not only the 90 from before and the 100 dollars but also an extra 20 or 30.
I told him that I wouldn’t lend him the money if he needed it to buy a kidney and I was Donald Trump. He lost his car and I was happy. :smiley:
End Thread Two

Guess what. He paid me the 90 dollars he owed me in the first place just the other day not only the 90 but an extra 5 dollars :smack: . He said that he had been meaning to pay me back but things were really rough. I don’t know what “really rough” meant considering he had all this new ish. I was thinking though that maybe all the lame excuses were real and I started to feel very guilty. Then I thought about it some more and I realized I shouldn’t feel guilty although I am confused on his sudden turn around from avoiding me at all costs to paying me interest.
End Thread Three

Why 3 in 1, because since they were all related I didn’t feel each of them should have gotten their own thread…ok no bad comments about that please…pwease :wink:

Well, you got your money back eventually and learned a valuable lesson to boot. There’s a saying I heard a lot growing up

“Neither a borrower or a lender be”

I try to live by that myself, apart from with people I really trust. It also can help to use the same rule as with gambling. If you can’t afford to lose it, keep it in your pocket.

I’ve been going through this on a car I sold to a guy (not really a friend) on payments. His wife just gave birth, I know his dad, her dad is a cop I know and his car just dropped its transmission. Being the nice guy (mark) that I am, I agree.

That was 7 weeks ago, and according to his story to his wife, he owes me $50. I told her it was $400. He was taking money from his check, telling her it was going to me, and spending it on drugs.

Note: I thought he was clean.

So now I’m expecting the $400 Thurs of Fri from her child-support check. Hey, it’s harsh but I haven’t seen or heard from him in a month. 2 weeks of that because he was stopped by her dad for DUS. That PD knows it’s stolen if not paid for, so I’m not really out anything, but the shitstain never had the balls to tell me he had to make other arrangements. (A fight broke out in the meanwhile, he’s avoiding me now)
Lesson learned: Don’t loan anyone money unless you’re willing to be a hardass getting it back. Some people need to find out you’re REALLY serious about being paid back.

I suspect this is how the early days of the Mafia made a reputation.

All in all, I think this worked out fairly well (outside of the car thing). You learned that money loaned is really money given, you just hope to get it back. He learned that if you don’t pay your debts, there won’t be anyone to help you out in a tough spot.

I feel you, START.
I tried to do a good thing for a long-time friend who needed to "pay her parole officer 250 or she'd go to jail that Friday". I had lent this ^&% money many times before and had been paid back every time. I had been working it out at my job as a loan, and she’d make good on it the following day. She was working at the time and knew that if I couldn’t pay back the loan I got for her, it would probably cost me my job.
This time it came out my own pocket (actually off a credit card :rolleyes: [cue whine] because she’d go to jail otherwise![/whine] )and was to be paid back the following Monday.
Much drama ensues, she loses her job, gets shipped off to another town to stay with her grandma because her dad refuses to put up with her anymore and then her mom’s supposed to come get her to move to New Mexico.
It’s been a few months at this point and I’m a patient person.
Too patient. I do remind her about once a month that she could drop 5, 10, maybe even $20 on what she owes me instead of buying that whole carton of New Port Lights in a box, or going to the club, or going out to eat.

Anyways, I haul her back to town because if she leaves the state, I have no chance to get any of my money back. I let her stay with me for a month and even bought her part of her uniform she needed for work so she wouldn’t lose her new job.
Lost it anyways for being a slack-ass ^&F$D#.
When she did get another job she felt it more important to give all her first paycheck to her crack-dealing boyfriend to pay for groceries because she’ been staying with him for two weeks. $175.00 check gone.
He cheats on her, kicks her back out of town to grandma’s.
All this entire time she’s getting new clothes and such because she’s supposedly conning her grandma into buying them for her.
So a year and a half later, when I have the audacity to inquire as to when I’m finally going to gets see any money, she gets mad at me, starts talking behind my back and lying to other people.
Talking to her best friend/aunt, I come to find out that she stole from me too.

I think I could live with the guilt if I could get the revenge. :mad:
If I had anything in writing, we would’ve already been to court.

I’ve learned my lesson for sure.
I’m madder at myself now for being such a push-over dumb ass idiot.

Oh, yes, after she stopped talking to me for a few months, she extended an “olive branch” around Christmas. She called my phone and tells me in a snotty, huffy tone that she’ll be in town to see her dad for Christmas “if I wanted to talk”.
I told her that at this point I had nothing to talk about and hung up.
I’ll be damned to hell before I start talking to this ^&*@ and let her use me again.
That’s the only reason she called.
She realized she lost her meal ticket.

Damn good for you to stick to your guns. Just watch out for him getting borrow-friendly again. He might just be thinking it’s worth paying back the $90 + $5 if he can hit you up for even more at a later date. I guess it’s like making sure he still has credit with the bank.

*Just watch out for him getting borrow-friendly again. *He might just be thinking it’s worth paying back the $90 + $5 if he can hit you up for even more * *

I was thinking the exact same thing :wink: