Boy, am I glad I have cats. They NEVER do shit like this. (At least they don’t admit it.)
My formerly very naughty 14 year old labrador has an old lady act going on to convince me that she has changed her ways. I know it’s an act though, just last week I turned my back for a second and a whole entire salami mysteriously disappeared off the kitchen table…
And right after that she’s all like “gracer you need to lift me into the car even though I swam in mud, I’m old!” :mad:
#12 is my pug - she’ll get comfy on the ottoman, then lick a circle around her. And we had to insert a spacer in the cat door to keep her from eating the tootsie rolls in the box on the landing. I don’t think the cats appreciate having to scooch down to get to their litterbox.
I’m sorry, but my cats have done or tried to do about half those things.
Hell, my laptop is still missing 4 keys which were devoured by my late one-eyed, one-eared, asthmatic, arthritic, epileptic, runover-survivor of a cat. Every time I try to type a number ‘6’ and hit a weird rubber nipple where the key should be, I remember how much I loved to hate that cat.
My girl Stella is guilty of a few of those. The one that makes me the most crazy is licking the couch. What is that about? I don’t remember her doing that on our old couch.
Thanks for the link… I had a good laugh at some of those. I had an Australian Cattle Dog that licked the carpet ALL.THE.TIME! Drove us crazy! I mean, why? Every evening when we sat down after dinner to watch some TV, he’d get going. He’d lay down in different places around the room and you could hear the scratch, scratch, scratch of his tongue… Stop! we’d say and he would for about 2 minutes. Scratch, scratch, scratch… He’d finally get tired and doze off for the night.
He started doing this when he got older. The vet said it was an anxiety thing. He couldn’t get around very well outside to chase the farm critters anymore so he licked the carpet instead???
On the wall at the Post Office
Oh dear, pissing myself laughing here.
Thanks OP! 
When our girls where pups (Border Collie mixes) they decided that the feathers in our king sized bed pillows needed to be set free.
Oh my. Our bedroom looked like it just got 3 inches of snow. I was laughing to hard to get mad.
Taffy, our new-ish chihuahua puppy rescue, likes to try to dig on beds. Delmar, our old (and now sadly deceased) chihuahua, did this, too, but he would stop in a few seconds. She won’t. We think it might be something she learned while she was in the school dumpster.
She also likes to steal shoes. She can’t really chew them up, but she can carry them, even if they are almost as big as she is.
She also got into my sister’s chocolate, and ate more than even my sister could in one setting. Yet, we never saw any evidence that it affected her. Delmar got a single semi-sweet chocolate chip and acted crazy for a whole day. Granted, he was over 10 while she is less than 1.
#4 is the one that makes me Let’s go to the quarry and throw stuff down there the most! Thanks OP!