A Breakthrough! Not the good kind! (Warning: bras and big breasts)

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

Maybe they were just all gearing up for Dead Bra Day, but lately it’s like my bras are having a mutiny. I’ve had a series of breakthroughs. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. When the underwire decides to liberate itself from it’s little fabric tube-prison, so it pops out and stabs you in the armpit. Argh! I have had exactly three bras do this within the past week and a half.

I can’t throw them away. They’re some of my best, comfiest prettiest bras. And I’m incredibly poor right now so I can’t buy more, because it is both expensive and a tremendous struggle trying to find cute comfy holsters for these suckers. They’re huge, goddammit, and all I want is to be able to hold them up comfortably and in something that’s at least vaguely sexy, without wires popping through and stabbing my armpits. Is that so much to ask?

Maybe this part is a bit IMHO or GQ – can they be saved? I neeed them. I can’t pull the wires out because without the wires they’re useless, they do nothing. At the moment I’m stuffing the wires back inside, folding over the edge and safety-pinning it down, but it’s only a matter of time before a safety pin pops and stabs me in the armpit even worse. Argh!

Normally, I love my boobs. But damn, does this bite.

#2

Hmmm… Maybe you could use some waterproof glue that will stick to fabric and metal (I’d check the automotive section of Wal-Mart). If you coat the wire and slide it back in fast maybe it will hold, at least for a while. Of course, I don’t have experience in things like this, I’ve never worn a Bra :slight_smile:

MC$E

#3

“Warning: bras and big breasts” is not the kind of thing to keep a lot of people away, not me anyway.

That said do you have a sewing machine? Can you borrow one?

#4

I can’t sew to save my life. I’ve tried. I might be able to get a friend to sew it, but it makes me feel a little oogy to think of my kinda creepy ex-roommate (the only one I know with a machine) sewing the wires back into the thing that holds up my boobs. I should look into that, though.

#5

Same thing happens to me occassionally. If the bra is worth saving, I tuck the wire back through and sew/patch the hole by hand sewing. It doesn’t take great sewing skills. To keep that little devil of a wire from poking through in the same spot, I scootch the underwire to another spot. Most of my bras have an inch or so of room for moving the wire forward or backward. This technique is nifty for when the wire is jabbing you and you can’t make a repair right away, too.

#6

Duct tape. One way or another, it’ll solve any problem known to man.

Oh, wait, bras… nope, not a problem known to man (except for how to get all those little hook thingies undone), so please ignore this post.

#7

I’m thinking I may just have to borrow a needle and thread from somebody and do some sort of psycho sewing job. I’ll do my best, I suppose. I really do not want to and can’t afford to buy new bras, and this is the only thing wrong with them. It is incredibly freaking hard to find a nice, pretty, comfortable bra in a 42DD that won’t cost an arm and a leg. Argh! And of course, all my ugly bras that dig and are evil never break. Just the pretty sexy ones.
Not that it really matters what my underwear looks like when nobody ever sees it but me anyway… ::grumbleValentine’sDaysucksgrumblgrumble::

#8

Sing it, sister! I’m a 40 DD & know the pain of mutinous underwires, as well as the irritation of having to hunt high & low for a non-grandma-looking bra.

That being said, I’d try either the hand-sewing (usually works) or, if all else fails, the duct-tape option. Might as well give it a shot, right? Lemme know how it goes. And for pretty bras, try catalogues (if you can afford it).

#9

When you do get ahold of a sewing machine, put a patch of ribbon or another, stronger fabric over either end of the little evil fabric tube, and back-stitch the hell out of it. Zig until there is no more zag. That will keep the little bugger in place.

Where in PA are you? I’m just south of the border, I’d be happy to help you out if I can.

#10

I’m way up in north central-ish PA, Ginger, about 15 minutes from the NY border. Thanks fer the offer, though. It appears I’m going to have to brave sewing. Gah, that scares me. My mother could sew anything (if anyone remembers my prom dress pictures? She made that.) and my sister is constantly making her own skirts and dresses and shirts and stuff. I can’t even sew a little wire back into a bra. I made a pillowcase once, with the help of my mom. “Just fold it in half and sew around three edges. No, not THOSe three edges! Give me that.” I am pathetic.

Of course, I also can’t cook and don’t clean… I would have died trying to be a housewife in the 40’s or something… oy. :slight_smile:

#11

Hand sewing really isn’t all that difficult. The hardest part is trying to get the thread into the needle. Once thats done, just stick it into the fabric and sew it where it looks like stitches should be.

GingerOfTheNorth’s idea of using ribbon sounds great.

#12

I have a girlfriend who recently gave her bras a decent burial. She called them her “thong bras”…

When I gave her that quizzical look because I’d never heard of such a thing, she explained that the fabric on the sides had worn so that her boobs were just being held together by the edges. :rolleyes: :slight_smile:

In the for what it’s worth department, I don’t like underwires because the ALL do that. You’d think the manufacturers would take Ginger’s idea and sew the ends with a slightly denser fabric in the first place.

#13

Do you have a craft store or a WalMart near you? You could try getting fusible web and/or the iron-on (no-sew) hem stuff. With the fusible web, you iron it on and then you can iron another piece of fabric on top of it. The no-sew hem stuff -I can’t for the life of me think of the right term, and I just saw it the other day when I was looking for stuff for a costume I was putting together for my daughter. Aaaggh, advancing age and sleep deprivation are not a good combination!- anyway, it’s basically a length of ribbon, but it has a fusible side that you can iron on to another fabric. You can cut it to fit the spot.

While I could certainly use the extra support, I can’t stand those wires. As much as I hate having to lift my floppies off the desktop all the time, so to speak, it’s better than those damn wires cutting into me!

#14

Well, even if the idea of sewing terrifies you, having them repaired by your local dry cleaner may cost a couple of bucks, but it’ll be a LOT cheaper than new bras…

…and good luck; I feel your pain! I hate spending good money on torture devices, and usually ugly ones at that!

#15

What’s the purpose of that wire anyway?

#16

Preach it sistah!
I HATE that problem, and with a 42 DDD chest finding a pretty bra is hell, and I have never found a bra that cost me less than 30 bucks, pretty or no. Hand sewing will probally show through on the outside and ruin the prettyness, but here is a tried and true method of bra repair that I have devised for just this nasty problem.
GOTO Wal-Mart, or your local fabric store, buy a roll of Heat Bond or some other no sew hem maker.
You will find this in fabrics. Buy some satin ribbon that looks pretty on your bra. Make sure that it is satin, and wide enough to cover the spot. Nylon ribbons scratch the hell out of your armpits.

Then take the stuff home and whip out your iron. Set it to the temp that it tell you to on the back of the heat bond, and while it heats up wrastle that wire back into the bra. Cut a piece of ribbon large enough to cover about 1/8 to 1/4th of and inch past the hole in the tube, cut off the little hard strips on the sides of the ribbon (these scratch too) and cut a piece if the heat bond to match the size. Iron the heat bond to the bra, it is ready when the paper backing lifts easily off. Put the ribbon over that sticky spot and iron it in good so the ribbon won’t just lift up. (Don’t yank it off though) Let cool, and TaDAAAA!!! a lovely repaired bra.

~aqua

#17

I had always imagined it being part of some complex endoskeleton, like the metal frames that support rigid airships.

That, and it makes the brassiere an effective sling to throw a salvo of oranges at people. Yes, I was a wierd kid :smiley:

#18

Oy… these suggestions all sound great, except now y’all think I might have an iron? Iron? I don’t iron. If something is especially wrinkly, I toss it in the dryer for a minute or two. Christ, an iron? You expect too much. Oy. But I will look around.

And TGWATY, as far as I can tell, the wire is there provide a… support beam, as it were. A less-yielding portion than fabric and pretty stuff. Not sure exactly how an itsy-bitsy wire does it, but it works. I can’t wear a bra without underwires, they just… hang there. ::shudder:: My girls need a little more support than a little lycra and satin can offer. They’re heavy suckers. I never run, jog, do jumping jacks or similar stuff… sports bras just don’t work and I’m afraid they’ll blacken my eyes or rip right off. Owwwie, it hurts just thinking about it. I’m going to bed. Argh.

#19

You know, they should just make the wire go all the way around, maybe dead-ending it in the strap.

Make it and market it, the “Poke Free Bra.” chuckles at the name

#20

Pepper Mill doesn’t wear underwire bras. She believes them to be an invention of the devil (and I don’t even think she believes in the devil). Apparently, at the end of a long day, that underwire can hurt like hell even if it hasn’t poked through. I think about an underwire jockstrap and I can see her point.
Somehow or other she manages to find bras that five her support without the wire. How, I do not know, but there are options out there.

I think I need to invent the “under-Cavorite” bra.