Discussion over. No wonder there’s so much animal abuse in the world.
I just have to add that my pets, my two birds, have no obligation to entertain me. They “exist” because someone else abandoned them and I rescued them. They owe me nothing.
:rolleyes: You know precisely what I meant. When I see those stupid videos that PETA likes to show of animals being tortured, I cringe like the rest of us.
I have nothing but bile for the thousands (tens of thousands? More?) of animal owners who starve, beat and otherwise abuse the pets in their charge on a daily basis. But let’s be realistic. When most people decide that they want a cute puppy or kitty, they’re doing it for selfish reasons.
I’ve owned rats and I dearly cared for all of them. I gave them cute names and I played with them and took good care of them. When a mother died I fed babies with an eyedropper. But they were still my pets. I didn’t own them because I wanted to rescue them from the snakes they would have inevitably been fed to had I not purchased them. I owned them because I like rats and I wanted to have some as pets.
But this argument won’t go anywhere, we both know that. Hopefully the OP’s situation will work out for the best. I just hope he doesn’t give up an animal that he loves so that it can stay with Flica when it could make new friends. If there’s one thing I dislike more than anguish in animals, it’s anguish in people.
Mew will do fine with you, and I agree about the suggestion by others of finding a companion.
I’m quite concerned about Flica, left on her own for days at a time with no companion. She sounds like she needs company and nags you for it, she is not going to do well on her own, leaving her for such periods really is not fair by your SO.
I don’t think that leaving Mew is a good option either, you may well spend lots of time away but he clearly appreciates your presence.
Sounds very much like the best option for the cats is for you to keep them, this is not a personality thing between you and your SO, but this is so obviously the best thing, of course you will then be tied down and have all the care costs, and the heartache and anxiety when they age.
Also, what happens at first doesn’t have to continue. Move out with Mew, leaving Flica with the SO but make sure you stress to her that if caring for her cat becomes too much of a hassle you’ll always be willing to take her in.
Hopefully after a week or two of coming home to an overflowing litter box and a superclingy unhappy cat the SO will decided pet ownership really doesn’t work for her.
That’s the wonderful thing about an animal. They won’t spend a lot of time grieving the loss of their playmate. Yes they will walk around, looking for the other, calling out to, being more clingy to you, but they can adapt quite well to new enviroment.
Cats are solitary by nature.
Animals have emotion. Assigning it an inferior status to human emotions is purely an emotional affectation we practice to make us feel better. The principal differences between our emotions and theirs is that we understand more easily when humans express emotions, and of course, human emotions win these conflicts because they are backed by unlimited power.
I want to share my story because I feel it really relates here, even if it involves a dog and not a cat. I got my dog about a month before I met my ex. Eventually we moved into together and my ex (being unemployed) was around all day long and formed a tight bond with my dog. They were practically inseparable, but this didn’t make me love my dog any less. Eventually, it was decided that my ex and I weren’t meant to be and needed to split ways. The BIGGEST issue of the whole ordeal was the dog. My ex insisted that by removing the dog from him, the dog would be traumatized and surely its health would be effected. I loved my dog dearly but with all my ex’s guilt trips I did worry. In fact, if it hadn’t been for my friends and family telling me over and over that he was MY dog and I loved him too, I very well might have given him up.
In the end, I took Jordie (the dog) with the stipulation that if his health started to be effected or he was “caught in a state of mourning” ( my ex’s words, not mine) I would give him up. As tight as their bond was, the dog came out fine. He was sad for a few days, but with the move and everything, I think he would have been a little mopey and turned around anyways. Now he is happy and healthy. I can see no long term effects of the loss of my ex. Remember that while animals DO form bonds, like humans, they are fully capable of accepting loss, as humans do. Sure he may be down for a couple of weeks, but he will get over it. And a couple of down weeks is very much worth a life of happiness for your cat, and you. Thousands of shelter animals do it every year.
Good Luck. I hope you can convince your ex to give you both animals, but if not, take Mew. You will both be happier in the long run for it.
As to cat interpersonal relationships, FWIW, years ago my neighbors had two cats. My roommate had a dog who stayed in the back yard. One day one of the cats got stuck in the fence and the dog mauled him to death. The whole time the other cat sat a few yards away, casually licking himself.
This.
I suspect that Flica will start showing her displeasure by pissing in the ex’s shoes, and pooping on the bed.
Shouldn’t be too hard to convince her to hand over the kitty then.
Or if Flica is uncooperative, you could “arrange” for there to be poop on the bed and pee in the shoes. (nudge, nudge) 
Will you be close enough, geographically, for her to leave Flica with you when she is out of town? If not, I’d say definitely take Mew with you, so at least he doesn’t lose you, and he won’t have to deal with being left while SO is gone. Better for him, even without Flica. Then make sure SO understands that you’re more than willing to take Flica back, no questions or comments, if she finds the arrangement not working out so well. If that doesn’t happen, get another kitty. Mew will adjust, and he’s still better off with you than being left alone half the week.
Thank you for all of your input and thoughtful responses. I believe it will be best if at least I take Mew with me. Hopefully, she will give up Flica later (I know we both prefer Mew) or I can get him another playmate later.
I would miss him too much.
I think you made the right decision and I am so glad you’re keeping Mew. And, like children, cats can in fact make new friends, no matter how much they miss the old ones. Be better for Flica if she could come too but at least you and your bud will be together.
Cats aren’t solitary by nature, though. They can cope with being an only pet somewhat better than dogs do, but they really do a lot better if they have another cat for company, as well as a human to lord it over.
My daughter’s cat refused to eat much when my daughter moved out. We were seriously worried that he’d starve to death, despite having plenty of his favorite food available. I couldn’t tempt him to eat. He missed his mom desperately.
If they aren’t inferior to humans, then they’re our equals. If they’re our equals, then they’re merely our slaves.
Viva la Revolution! :rolleyes:
I appreciate your zeal but respectfully disagree. If an alien race were to watch my interaction with my cats, I am quite sure they would conclude I am the indentured servant. The cats don’t work, I maintain their food supply, do some grooming, and dispose of their waste matter. I am, in fact, their bitch.
And that’s the first step in recovery. 
How the hell did you make me go aww, EWWWW, and LOL all in 3 seconds? :p:p:p
I would say the cats are yours. You bought Mew, you inherited Flica. Keep 'em together.
I myself have hijacked a cat or two. One, a friend of mine was going to England for a year and perhaps forever, and didn’t want to put her cats through the quarantine period, which was 6 months! So she left them with me, with the understanding that if she came back, she could have her cats back.
Well. After a year, she came back. She did not get her cats back, what can I say? By then, those cats and I had been through a lot together.
I felt a little guilty, but not too much. She was okay with it. She could have offered me money. It would have taken a lot–but she didn’t offer any.