Airman- please address the subject of peanuts.
After you do Peanut Research, please explain how/why sometimes after you eat ramen noodles a long one can traverse your innards and exit nearly intact.
[sub]sniffle Poetry, sheer poetry.[/sub]
I prefer “drop the kids off at the pool” or “pump out a grumpy” myself. But I never, ever examine it to see what’s in it. I actively try not to look at it…I just stand up, reach behind me with eyes fixed firmly forward, and flush.
That’s called a tapeworm.
If you wedge one end inbetween your teeth then you can floss yourself.
Bartender: That’s okay, everyone blows chinks after drinking that much.
Customer: But Chunks is my dog!
chunks, dammit!!! :smack:
I for one welcome our new alien vegetable pseudomorph overlords.
Oddly, despite years of eating corn of many varieties, I have never seen it again after it goes down. What gives? Do I have some sort of super digestion at work?
Nah, it’s just going to all come out at once, one day. Be afraid, be very afraid.
This thread is truly ideal for being read by the intoxicated.
Hmmm. Despite the high probability of causing offense to a huge number of very nice people, I think the sentence “That’s okay, everyone blows chinks after drinking that much” deserves a second look.
I’m sorry it made me laugh. I hope I’m the only one.
Dude, didn’t you just say you were like 29? New rule: you’re not allowed to start posts with “as one grows older” unless you’re 35, minimum.
In any case, seriously, pace yourself. If you’re already inspecting your BM’s before you hit 30, then you’re not going to have anything left to do when you really get old. Nothing sadder than a 34-year-old guy standing out in shorts and sandals with garter socks, shaking his fists and screaming at the kids to slow down!
Well, I have just reaffirmed my thesis. I just took my “I haven’t slept in 36 hours” power dump, and when I stood up I had left an 18-inch turd that wrapped around itself so nicely that it almost looked fake. I went to toss in the paper and, lo and behold, there was corn in the crapola, just as I had hypothesised. The last time I had corn was probably three weeks ago, but yep, there it was.
I think I have the true answer to why this is. See, what happens is that when you eat refined corn (which is nearly ubiquitous) it reaches the stomach and then through some unknown process it recombines into whole kernels. As for peanuts, I’ll look into it but that’s an entirely different phenomenon, and one that’s misleading to boot. The incidence of peanuts appearing whole after dropping the chalupa is vastly overstated.
Anyhow, it’s like I said: I need funding to prove it. I’m up to 67 cents. Do I hear a dollar?
OK, this time it better come up under my name. I logged in under my name the first time, honest.
I know that that doompah was so big that it may have taken some brain matter with it, but nonetheless you’d think that I would remember whether I logged in or not, considering that it was approximately 30 seconds before I hit submit.
But I just want to cuddle!
I just wanted to say, this particular phrase has no place in an OP on this particular topic. I hope.
It’s those damn alien anal probes implanting the corn. What the hell you people think the Jolly Green Giant is?? Yep, big ol’ green corn implanting alien. I’ve been on his ship, it’s stacked with cases of Niblets and a 1920’s style Anal Corn Implanter. That’s why the stuff never looks digested. Seriously.