A funny Chicago bus-riding story for your amusement

I was on a bus in Chicago, on a bench seat that was positioned ‘sideways’ (as opposed to the usual ‘frontways’). Mrs. Mustard was on my right and my right arm was on the seat back behind her.

So as we’re traveling, at one point I feel my fingers brush up against something fuzzy, obviously some stuffing that was popping out of a tear in the seat back cushion. I absentmindedly brush it aside, but then feel it again; I start to play with it, still not really paying attention to anything at all. I’m flicking this seat stuffing with my finger, then I start twirling it around my finger. After a minute or so of this, I don’t feel it anymore. I glance over and realize, to my horror, that I had been playing with the hair atop some little old lady’s head. As I peered over, our eyes met for a millisecond as she was leaning away with a very concerned look on her face.

She got off at the next stop; I watched her walk in the pouring rain to a McDonalds and just sort of stand there as if wondering when the next bus was due to arrive.

Thank you. Hilarious!

Thank you for starting my day with a laugh!

ROFLMAO I bet she thought that was your surreptitious way to propose some hot 3-way action. She’ll probably never ride a bus again.*…

Once at an amusement park with my Wife, we were looking up at a very tall ride that we were about to take.

I’m about a foot taller than my wife, and I rested my head on top of hers and my hands on her shoulders as we looked up to watch it.

I then noticed a very concerned looking man just off to the side. Hmmm…… wonder why he is looking at me like that. Then I noticed my Wife. Standing next to him….

That’s some funny shit right there!

Better that, than a rat, which is where I thought this story was going. But still, hilarious!


Thanks for the great laugh. You and enipla brightened my day.

(I had a tough time getting this reply to post to this thread. Quick reply wouldn’t work for me. “The token has expired”??)

If we see a post in the “Encounters with Strangers” thread from an old woman who had to get off a bus because a strange man was flirting with her literally behind his wife’s back we’ll know who was responsible :smiley:

I actually LOL for that one, thanks.

A little more info on my bus ride:

I had no idea that there was anyone sitting next to my wife. The lady was, indeed, very short and her head was not within my peripheral vision.

While she wasn’t exactly ancient, she was probably in her 70s; the [del]seat fuzz[/del] hair was very gray.

I was traveling with a small group. I was so embarrassed that I didn’t tell anyone about it until the next day.

She didn’t pull away until I started the twirling.

Hilarious! Thanks for sharing! You’ve officially become “some weirdo on the bus” to some old lady. :smiley:

Once I was standing in the local drug store looking at the Halloween candy when my wife walked up next to me just as a Louis Armstrong song came on the radio. So naturally I started singing along in my incredibly terrible Satchmo voice. After a coupe of verses I looked over and it was not my wife but some random lady who walked away quickly.

Thank you for sharing this. I did the exact same thing at a movie theater once… apparently, someone sitting behind me was resting her foot (covered with a fuzzy sock) on the back of my armrest. So without ever really realizing I was doing it, I started playing with this nice fuzzy object… when it suddenly jerked away, and all at once I realized what had happened. :eek::eek::eek: