A lighthearted question about flaming infernos of death

Which is worse: to be in a flaming inferno caused by the carefully planned acts of a worldwide cabal of Islamic terrorists or to be in a flaming inferno caused by the stupidity of a retread hair metal band?

(Remember, we’re in IMHO, not the Pit here. Cheerful, irreverent answers preferred. No actual buildings were burned to destruction in the making of this post.)

No one will feel sorry for you if you die seeing a retarded hair metal band.

Oh, hair band any day. There’d probably be muic to accompany your death. You know, like the Titanic.

With an office building, the best you can hope for is elevator muzak and let’s face it, there are only so many seconds’ worth of “Livin La Vida Loca” the orchestral version that I could take before hoping the heat generated from the flames raised the cable temperature to its melting point and I sweetly plummeted out of my misery.

But if you do manage to get yourself out of the hair band fire, I’d recommend not going to see them on tour anymore. Once bitten, twice shy, you know?

Well the gobernment not going to give you a big check to make sure you don’t sue anyone if you suffer death by has-been-o-rama, Plus I doubt that Bruce will come out with a great album because of your death. Also there probably will not be a huge international debate/competition about what sort of building will be built on the place of your death.

Does Great White perform “Nearer My God to Thee” with or without a guitar solo?

Or to put it another way:

Would you prefer to die watching your flesh melt off while choking on jet fuel fumes or being trampled to death in amidst a frenzied tumult of crazed metal chicks?

Yeah. This is a tough one.

Hmm. I feel Gorgon Heap raises some good points, but I’m still going with organization over randomness. Probably just my left brain talking, but I want to know that someone considered me and my decadent ways, even in a generalized fashion.

Still, recent trends notwithstanding, trampling’s gotta be a rarer form of death than fire, so that should be worth a few after-life cool points.

Well, “Flaming Infernos of Death” would be a great name for a retread hair metal band!

The muslims because they actively hate you for no damned good reason.
As for the hair band, they’re just stupid like their audience. DUDE I TOTALLY SAVED UP FOR WEEKS WORKING AT MICKEY DEES TO SEE THAT CONCERT!!! MY MULLET’S TINGLING!!! WELP SO MUCH FOR MOVING OUT OF MOM’S BASEMENT

As soon as they struck up the first note I’d hold my arms up and wave my lighter in the air. :smiley:

Are we assuming equal chances of death?

Wait, that’s not irreverent enough:

Considering the gubimint’s absurd reactions to terrorism, gotta say Death by Disco Inferno is the better of the options.

That way, I could just lose my party rights instead of my civil rights.
Plus it would make a great ice-breaker in heaven.

Heh. I just love the thread title - ironicky funny sorta thing.

As regards my personal preference for flaming inferos of death, I think I’d prefer Death by Hair Band, because it would be a slap in the face to any terrorists who wanted to kill me.

“Haha! Hair metal band got me first! Gotcha ya!*”

*Sorry, I just came from the resurrected Mind-Blowing Funeral thread, and I couldn’t help it.

But ticket were probably at least $35 to get into the band, and I would actually be on the clock with the terrorists. If the terrorists hit, like, just two minutes after I took lunch, would I get paid for the next 58 minutes? “I tried to clock back in, honest, but I couldn’t find our floor”.

Don’t worry. They’re working on those, too.

Too true. If the terrorists win, THEN THE TERRORISTS HAVE ALREADY WON.