A New Mini-rant Thread (the other one is gettin' kinda long ...)

The BBQ Pit
101

Update to my previous mini-rant:

So I actually DID end up going on a date with the cute girl from work, but fate decided to crush my hopes upon the spiky rocks of reality again. We go on the date, and she seemed to enjoy herself, and I figured I’d ask her out again. Well, the next night, when everyone from work is out downtown, I see her, as I figured I would…and she’s with a “friend” of hers. I recall her being out with this “friend” the weekend before, as well. They are pretty chummy, with lots of hands in the small of backs, and some dancing, and constant “hovering.” Aside from when he went to the bathroom, he was never more than two feet from her side, it seemed. Sure, it’s possible he is just a friend, and not a “friend,” but if you were seeing what I saw, I think you’d agree with me. Figures that the girl I decide to ask out is already seeing someone. :mad:

102

Ooooh, I got one.

Dear roommate: If you’re going to be always subsisting partially by mooching off your friends who you manage to allow you to live with them, and it’s for no reason that you simply don’t go to work when you feel like it, claiming to be an objectivist is massively hypocritical.

It’s been a while since I’ve read any Rand, and I’m not about to look it up now, but I’m pretty sure there was never a point in John Galt’s speech that mentioned that if you want some soft-core porn, it’s acceptable to just order it from On Demand, and when your roommate who pays the cable bill notices the charges make some vague promise to pay at some unspecified future point. As a matter of fact, my personal recollection is that mooching is specifically condemned several times.

103

Dear Very Good Friend,

So, you were having sex. It was good sex, from what I’ve heard. And I’ve met him, he’s a nice guy, but you two aren’t exactly even “dating” really.

And you can’t afford the Pill. And for some reason, which I don’t know (his choice? her choice?) you also weren’t using condoms.

So why the fuck are you now surprised that you’re pregnant? Damn! Did you think that there were special little fairies that lived in your cervix that would shoot to kill all sperm that entered? What the hell? You really don’t need to be pregnant - you have no money, no fucking partner. WHY THE FUCK WERE YOU SO STUPID!!!

And now, because you’re younger than me, I get to be a grownup and help you figure out what the fuck to do. I don’t know what the fuck to do - I’ve never done this! And do you know why? Because I’ve always been sure to be on some form of birth control before I fucked someone!!! Yeah, condoms that should have been used haven’t always been, but there’s always been some assurance that I could not get pregnant (either the Pill or my own body - I stop menstruating at a certain low weight).

For some reason, she looks up to me. I KNOW NOTHING! Except that she is in no position to raise a child at this point. I’m going to recommend an appointment with Planned Parenthood tomorrow - I don’t know how she feels about abortion, and I’m iffy myself (politically pro-choice, other people whatever they need, personally abortion-weird) but they might at least give her some good prenatal care and her baby could get adopted by a nice couple that lets her be a part of its life.

The lecture I’ve given will not help if given to her face - she’s petrified, knows she fucked up, but damn, I’ve been pissed.

(And in case it’s not obvious, I’m not the baby-daddy. I’m a woman.)

104

Damn you child for screwing up my last post! I had a great one going about my nerurotic monther and her rambling run-one phone calls regaling me with the sob stories of people I’ve never even MET, and you grabbed the mouse off the desk and closed my window. Now I’ll have to come back later when you’re asleep or something.

But you’re so freakin’ cute I could never be really mad at you. Not yet - you’re only one!

105

Jeeze, Merry, that’s not a mini-rant, that’s a whole thread! Yeah, we’ve all done stupid things, but she was unlucky enough to get caught at it. I hope she can figure out the best thing for her to do - Planned Parenthood sounds like a very good idea. She really needs to look into condoms, too - pregnancy aside, there’s a lot of diseases out there. Something like 80% of North Americans have the Human Papilloma Virus (genital warts) hanging around somewhere, never mind HIV and herpes.

(Aside - the Prince songs coming up on my iTunes right now are “What Do U Want Me 2 Do?” and “The Marrying Kind.” :smiley: )

106

Merry’s post has GOT to be the most delicious poster-post marriage that I have EVER seen.
:smiley:

107

Dear pseudo-boss,

Why do you hover so much? Can’t you stop telling lame jokes? You’re not funny, and to someone of a younger generation, you come across as being condescending, prejudiced and chauvinistic.

108

Wind chimes. Why in the name of sweet holy charity does anyone need wind chimes!? It’s senseless, useless, unnecessary NOISE!

109

To whoever hires the idiot meter readers from our electric company:

You know, since we first moved into this house, you guys have realized we have dogs. Why? Because they BARK at you. LOUDLY. So what happens?

First, we didn’t get our meter read for over four months – not because we weren’t using electricity, but because apparently the meter reader didn’t have the brains to realize that, duh-hey, there’s dogs barking but there’s a car in the driveway; maybe I should, I dunno, KNOCK and see if someone is HOME? And then we could make sure the back door is shut so the dogs wouldn’t come out and jump all over you with loudly expressed joy at OH BOY A NEW FRIEND! (For some reason, when 165 lbs of dogs jump on people, even in joy, they often aren’t thrilled. But most of the time it’s just me and the dogs home alone all day, so I’d prefer they alert me to people on the property, thank you very much.)

Finally, we called and ranted and complained enough that we were promised you’d put a note for the meter reader on our account so that, in the future, every month the he would come knock on the door and make sure the dogs were shut in the house before going into the back yard. Not trusting the ability of your employees to follow simple directions, I also hung a sign on the door at meter-reading time for several months, just to make sure we wouldn’t end up with another $400 bill due to your employees’ idiocy.

And then we had to put an extra latch on the gate to keep the dogs from popping it open, which apparently our last meter reader – who was the only one with even half a brain – apparently ALSO noted to our account. Although he always knocked on the door and then waited till I came around and opened the gate for him, which I appreciated.

So that means there are two notes on our account, right?

So what happens today? The idiot meter reader apparently READS the note about the gate…but IGNORES the note about the dogs. Who, luckily enough for him, were so tired this morning from going swimming two days in a row that they were sleeping like logs so, for the first time, did NOT wake up and notice that someone had come into our yard unannounced! Fortunately, whiterabbit was home and heard you in time to get to the back door to shut it before the dogs woke up; but if she hadn’t and you had been jumped by them, even though they wouldn’t hurt you? Frankly, I hope you would have crapped your pants! Hopefully the lecture whiterabbit delivered to him will persuade him that maybe ALL the notes on the account are worth following! We didn’t just have them put there to give your meter readers at sounding out big words, you know!

110

Panic attacks. Seriously, sat on the couch, heart pounding, head swimming, “there’s something I have to do/must remember or the world is going to end!”, short of breath stylie panic attacks.

I usually have one every few months - why did I have SIX in the last 24 hours, including 2 when I was trying to sleep (yesterday morning at two thirty am and last night at about ten thirty pm). Where the hell did this all come from?

111

Okay, colleague, repeat after me.

“The problem is that I don’t know how to use Excel.”

The problem is nothing that I am doing wrong. I have done exactly what I have been asked to do. If I could use wiki, it would make everyone’s lives a zillion times easier, but you can’t understand that so I need to use Excel (and many phone calls) to track versions and changes to this document. That’s fine.

But understand that when there are many columns of numbers which need to be manipulated and summed up, and you keep changing those numbers, I MUST use Excel. I know you would rather copy it line-by-line into Word each time you see it, so that when you unthinkingly click “print” it will look better on your piece of paper. However, using Word will make this task unfathomably difficult for me.

(Using wiki would make it unfathomably easy. but don’t worry, I’m not still bitter.)

So I have to use Excel (as I was so instructed by our boss). And I did it exactly according to your instructions. But you didn’t know that, because you don’t understand Excel, and your brain won’t let you think in anything but Word.

I’m okay with all of that. Really. I understand that my computer skills are far advanced of someone of your vintage and technophobia. Really.

Just don’t pretend the problem is anything other than you not knowing how to use Excel. Just admit it.

112

UCD Med Center:

you suck, a lot. I get there a few minutes late to my 1:00 appointment because your parking garage is a deathtrap! Seriously, who puts a deadend in a parking garage?!

Then I get all set, gown and all, just to sit in a bed for 3 hours. Finally the doctor comes in and realizes that I’m there for the wrong procedure. I was scheduled for an endoscopy, but it turns out I really need a colonoscopy. That’s a completely different orifice, people! So I’ve spent all day, missing my classes to sit in a bed with an IV in my arm for no fucking good reason!!!

Thanks a lot, that just totally made my week. :rolleyes:

113

To my secretary: You’re nice, you really are, and I like you and you do your job well. But could you please, *please *quit titling all your emails “From Mary Smith”? I know it’s from you because your first and last name appear just to the left of the subject line in Outlook. It was cute at first; now it just makes you look dumb.

To my coworker: You’re welcome to quit gossiping about me any time now. Really, it’s okay. Also, quit trying to steal my intern and my secretary. My team is understaffed and just barely keeping on schedule and I don’t have time for a stupid turf war with you. You get paid more than I do; maybe you could try doing your own work for a change?

To my boss: Make a decision. Make any decision. But please quit fretting and whining because your boss won’t make decisions for you. It’s not his job to make your decisions, nor is it mine. Did you know that it interferes with my ability to work when you won’t make decisions? It also makes me look bad and makes it harder for me to get a raise.

114

Do they still give you a pregnancy test every time you walk in, even if your complaint is a broken arm?

115

Dear construction companies: You know, it really is possible to erect a new building without closing the sidewalk! I’m getting really sick and tired of having to walk in the street because you’re too fucking lazy to provide a safe passage for pedestrians. There is no way to get to the Fairfax City publlic library from the south without either walking in a traffic lane or crossing a very busy street in the middle of the block without benefit of traffic light or walk signal. Every day I’m reminded that, because I don’t own a car, I’m a second-class citizen in this fucking country.

ETA: The sidewalk’s been gone since last summer! Shame!

116

Yeah, if you go to student health. When I went in as a freshman, I had a hard time convincing them that I didn’t need it. Apparently being a virgin isn’t enough, they just nod their heads like “Suure you are, hon”. :stuck_out_tongue:

I was at the Medical Center in Sacramento, you know, the “world renowned” one? yeah. :rolleyes:

117

My complaint is probably extremely common. There’s an eejit down the road whose house burglar alarm goes off nearly everyday, usually for several hours. I often work from home and the sound drives me bananas! I hope that his/her house does get broken into, no one will notice however because he/she hasn’t fixed their bloody alarm.

118

This is the week before exam week at my school (ok, technically exams do start this Friday, but whatever,) and there are some rules that classes must abide by.

  1. No exams are to be given this week. That means both no in-class final exams, and no “second/third” test type things. Those all had to be done with last week.

  2. Thursday is a reading day. No classes.

  3. So what happens? Two of my classes had finals this week, one was Monday, the other was Tuesday. Oh, and if that wasn’t bad enough, the class that had a final on Tuesday also had a 20-page term paper due the same day. WTF?!

  4. I have a class on Thursday morning. This class, the only one i have any work left for, has a presentation due Wednesday next week and two “take home exams” due next week as well, and I haven’t even gotten the second one yet, even though we finished that section two weeks ago. Each section is taught by a different prof., and had he just handed out his problem set when he was done, I could have done it by now, but now it will just compound with all my other work. :mad:

119

If you university/college rules state that this wasn’t supposed to happen, you should complain to the appropriate authorities.

120

To the nurses caring for my husband at the hospital. Please pay attention to him when he says that the medicine you are injecting is burning in his vein. He’s not saying it to be funny or to be a complainer, it actually really hurts him. Now it’s all red in that spot so you took out the IV and put it in his other arm only to have the same medicine hurt going in. Now he can’t have an IV in either of those veins and you don’t know how to give him his medication. And you freaked him out by telling him he has cellulitis or someshit, which, when I look it up, is a very worrisome condition. To make matters worse I came home today because I thought he would be ok without me. You fucking suck.