So this week, two sort of interesting things happened.
I know some of you are just looking for the naked lady, so I’ll tell you the OTHER one first. Heh.
We get a “bill” each month that details how many papers we deliver, notations about tips, etc. I looked mine over carefully and found that a customer had given me a $50 tip! Wow! Then I noticed that the SAME customer had given me ANOTHER $50 tip. Hmmmm.
I called my manager and said, “I can’t believe I’m even telling you this…”
“Don’t quit,” he said. “Please tell me you aren’t quitting.”
“Nope, but the money folks overpaid me by $50.”
“Hmmmmm,” he replied. “I’m going on vacation. We’ll worry about it next month.”
Whooohoo! So I have, basically, a fifty dollar loan from my boss. Unless he forgets, and I’m not telling him twice. (Okay, I probably WILL tell him twice, because I’m too durned honest.)
Okay, the naked woman. Sunday I was running a bit late, and was just finishing up my route about 6:40 or so. I hopped out of the van with two papers, one for the upstairs and one for the downstairs apartment. I was juuuust about to head up the sidewalk to the lower apartment, when the door opened and the lady stepped out, which wouldn’t have caught my notice except that she was totally nude. She obviously hadn’t seen me, so I made a quick right and headed up the stairs to the other apartment. By the time I got back, she was, of course, on the other side of a firmly closed door.
I was torn between ebarrassment for her (having been in similar situations…ask me about the phone guys showing up unexpectedly in the backyard…) a twinge of jealousy (cause damn, I used to have a body like that!), and a deep and abiding thankfulness that my 16 yo son wasn’t with me that morning. He would have crawled right under the nearest car and died, I imagine, and we would never know if the cause was embarrassment or sheer, unadulterated ecstacy.
I know it ain’t NASA, but it has its moments. And shoot, even NASA guys need their papers delivered, right?
~karol
I feel for you. When I was a poor university student, I did a door-to-door information thing one summer. Half-naked people were a frequent sight, but one time a man came to the door completely naked and continued to stand there entirely unabashed while I explained the joys of changing gas companies to him. Fair play to the guy for not being ashamed of his nakedness, but it was a little disconcerting for me to say the least.
Well, I’ve never been nude in front of a paper carrier before. But I did lactate in front of the UPS guy. I was very pregnant (of course), and he was handing me a box that was a little heavier than I expected. And my breasts went off like a couple of fountains. He of course was mortifide. I know he just wanted to get out of there, but he insisted on putting the box in the house for me.
What was she coming out of the house for, bodypoet? (I absolutely love your screen name, BTW, it’s been one of my favorites for a while)
I let my dog out every morning when I first get out of bed for my bladder-bursting trip to the bathroom; and I rarely put on any cover before I do. There’s only been one time that I saw someone notice me, but the expression on his face had me cracking up all day. Simple pleasures.
She expected her paper to already be on her doorstep, I think. I think she beat a hasty retreat when she realized I was on my way to her door.
Coincidentally, it was the dog’s fault when the telephone guys saw me in my skivvies, too. I’d gone out (unfortunately, I couldn’t even blame it on the early hour, as it was about 10 a.m.) in underwear and bra and was standing halfway into the yard when I heard voices…turned around and lo! telephone guys traipsing right through the grass! To their credit, they didn’t run screaming for the hills. One of them said, “We’re just here to fix your phone, ma’m.” To which I responded, “Just gotta tell you two things: First, I don’t usually stand half naked in my yard at ten in the morning. And second, my phone isn’t broken; my neighbor’s is.” Heh.
Thank you for the compliment on my name; I feel like I should be way younger and thinner to get away with it, but it’s related to my business name, so I guess it’s okay.
~k
This is so embarrasing, because I did, too! Except, hey, in my town when the police come a knockin’ at your door and find that you’re keeping that body in a barrel out back, they make you give the body up. Is that what happened with your body, too?
Flew PipeLine Patrol and we had on lateral of about 5 miles that was an out and back. About 2 miles out was THE HOUSE. By the time I was coming back there was the cutest nakid lady on a blanket in the back yard of THE HOUSE who would way so delightfully…
No, never went out there in a car, landed or anything except waggle the wings in appreciation as I flew by. Every other week, Mondays were not so bad…
Simple pleasures.
