All my friends are gay. I’ve had straight friends in the past, but over the years either they or I have moved on, and we’ve lost contact. No particular reason, it’s just the way things turned out. Since starting afresh, all the friends I’ve made since have been through meeting people at the local gay pub, or online via gay chatrooms.
Although this wasn’t intentional, having all gay friends is actually pretty neat. I don’t have to watch what I’m saying around any of them, we all like to hang out in the same places, and we all have a first-hand understanding of each others’ lives. But like any crowd of people, they’re all different in their own ways at the same time.
As pezboy2u pointed out, the gay community can be a hotbed of cattiness at times, which is one of it’s downsides. For me, the simple solution is to just to ignore those individuals, and concentrate on enjoying the company of those I do wish to spend time with. Life’s too short to get riled up by people who wish to flaunt their silly little attitude problems.
Mockingbird… Certain “sections” of my female friends are highly incestuous. Some are openly into polyamory, etc. Some just end up falling in love/lust (albeit transiently most of the time) with friends while in a “committed” relationship with someone else.
Then there’s the “Mommies” club…last year’s incestuous/polyamorous grrls who have decided that this year, their energy and $$ are better spent on: a) therapy to ensure that their current relationship lasts longer than the ones in their past b) fertility drugs c) inseminations and d) volvos.
I don’t have much insight to offer you on the boys in general. I’m still trying to figure out my last gay boy roomie. He and his boyfriend were pretty much always breaking up. And my roomie just couldn’t understand how the “old man” could get jealous just because “straight” married men happend to steadily ask to give him blowjobs in the shower at the gym. Of course it wasn’t just a matter of asking to give him a blowjob…the blowjobs were usually given.
However, I’m sure my old roomie doesn’t understand why I put up with most of the emotional roller-coaster dyke shit that I did either.
My circle of lesbian friends is pretty incestuous. You could do a ‘six degrees of separation’ based on who’s slept together and you’d never need to go past step three. However, the same goes for my med student friends, other college friends, pretty much all groups of sexually attractive young people. The only difference with same-sex couples is that they’re more likely to stay friends after they’ve broken up.
I’ve got a pretty good mix of gay/straight friends here in San Francisco. It certainly helps that it is San Francisco, though.
I am a senior in high school and made most of my friends in elementary in middle school. We were all assumed straight then. Since that time, most of them are out and proud, which leads me to believe that either some of them are just coming out as gay/bi to fit in with the crowd, or else there’s some kind of gaydar that attracts young potential queers to each other.
I suppose I’m what must be classified as a “late bloomer,” because, as yet, I have no interest in sex with people of either gender. That said, I’m more comfortable around gay people becasue they know what it’s like to feel different.
crinklebat… I just wanted to say that you sound like a well-adjusted person I was pretty much asexual untill I was 21, but I was in no way comfortable with that. I felt like a big ol’ freak. The farther I got into college, the more common I found “late bloomers” to be, regardless of sexual preference, even if it meant identifying as ‘asexual’.
All my close friends, bar one, are other lesbians. The one exception is a straight guy that I am very close to. He’s like a brother to me.
Why? I don’t really know. I guess my social circles are mostly lesbian and I don’t really feel I have much in common with a lot of straight women. I relate well to straight males, forming friendships with some, but most don’t last (it’s usually in the context of workmates).