A pox on your dance recital!

In My Humble Opinion
1

At last I have found an appropriate target for my venom - the children’s dance recital!

Would someone PLEASE explain to me why dance schools insist on staging such bloated, expensive, wasteful, excessive spectacles? Is there any other child’s recreational activity that regularly engages in such excess, without consideration of the level of ability of the participants?

As you might guess, I had the pleasure of spending two hours of a beautiful Father’s Day afternoon inside a darkened theater watching questionable choreography performed by children of varying degrees of talent and ability (or lack thereof.) In addition to the price of one glorious afternoon, I got to pay $60 for a costume that will never be worn again, and $45 for three tickets. And my wife got to waste 3 hours the week before during a dress rehearsal that was the epitome of inefficiency and lack of organization.

What is the purpose of these boondoggles? Does anyone like them? If so, please inform me of their redeeming factors.

Why do they require the purchase of expensive custom costumes? Wouldn’t simple leotards, tights, dance pants, etc. suffice? Something that would not be incredibly expensive, and that the kid might actually wear more than once? And don’t even TRY to give me the line about them making wonderful Halloween costumes!

Why do parents go along with this? What lesson does it teach their kids other than that even incompetence and mediocrity will be celebrated? These idiotic parents presented kids with huge bouqets, irrespective of whether their little darling even knew their assigned dance or not.

The little kids certainly looked darling. I’ll give you that. But when you finished oohing and aahing, it became apparent that the majority of them knew little or no technique. Why the need to put someone up on a stage, if they aren’t capable of doing anything especially worth watching?

My kid simply wants to learn to tap dance. She has been very frustrated that for the entire second half of the year, they learned little if anything new, and instead, worked solely on their recital routine.

We have experienced this wasteful phenomena in park district programs, as well as professional studios, and regarding ballet, jazz, tap, and Irish Step. Why does the culture of dance studios perpetuate this ridiculous practice?

2

Um - that should read DANCE recital.
I’ll ask a mod to change it.

3

How old are these kids? When they’re little, it’s as much about confidence building as it is about dance. The fact that they get up there and do it is a big deal to some kids. And their parents, who may have been struggling with a very shy child.

When they get older, the incompetent ones don’t go up on stage.

4

But I have to agree with you…the cost of these recitals is out of control. My mom made my dance costume, and I don’t believe admission was charged. We’re talking ancient history, so I don’t really remember.

5

I feel your pain. My daughter took ballet and tap for 2 or 3 years when she was little (ages 6-8). For one recital, I had to buy the overpriced, foofy, besequinned outfit (thankfully, her class only had one - another class had 2, and one was really expensive!!) Once she went to the Suzuki school, they didn’t used the overpriced costumes - they wore bright t-shirts over their leotards. We never had to pay an admission fee, tho - that was included in the class price, I believe.

Why? Because we all believe that our little darlings are the most talented, most promising, most likely to achieve stardom and support us for the rest of our lives!! :smiley: Or we just feel like we need to support our kids in their endeavors.

I have to tell you, quite honestly, I’d rather sit thru a dance recital than another piano/voice recital. Two and a half hours on hard wooden pews (the piano teacher had a deal with her church to do the recitals there) starting with the tiny little ones who did 3 songs that took 12 seconds each up to the allegedly advanced students who played longer, torturous pieces, to the singers who felt they had to do ballads and dirges - one can’t do an upbeat song at a recital, can one?

Ah, the joys of parenthood. If it makes you feel any better, my folks had to sit thru my accordion recital! :eek:

6

Kalhoun - kids start dance pretty young - probably 3-4. As with most activities - soccer, gymnastics, tee-ball - it is a while before the kids actually develop any proficiency. However, AFAIK, most other activities don’t require a yearly purchase of equipment and ticket admissions like dance.

In sports, you buy your gear and equipment, but you use them all year. And you can see your kid at all of the games/tournaments.

I have 2 girls, ages 12 and 15. They both have done quite a bit of dancing. The eldest liked ballet and especially Irish Step, until she experienced an ankle injury which seems to be chronically exacerbated by those. She now focuses on her music.

My youngest has done gymnastics, Irish, jazz, and now started tap.

There seems to be a break somewhere around 10 years old or so, where the kids are capable of remembering a routine, and have developed enough technique to actually look good up on stage. Yet, I have seen several different dance studios where all of the younger kids are dressed up and trotted out. As I said, they look incredibly darling. But not $100 worth. Moreover, if you kid takes 2 different dances, say tap and ballet, that is another $60 costume you have to buy.

If the issue were simply instilling confidence, then they could be done on a smaller scale. The one I was at yesterday involved rental of a 1000 seat auditorium where I have seen the likes of Dave Grisman, Corky Segal, and Kurt Elling.

And instead of special costumes, why not simply require that each kid wear a black leotard and pink tights - traditional ballet wear? Or black jazz pants for the tap classes.

And the flowers! Not just a single stem, but huge bouquets! For little kids. IMO, a stop afterwards for ice cream is far more appropriate both for the age and level of ability.

Instead, I think it is a desire to present the kids as doing something greater than they are actually capable of. Many of these kids are being celebrated for nothing more than their parents’ payment of registration and class fees. No reflection of their ability, dedication, or accomplishment.

FCM - I have been spared vocal recitals, but have sat through my share of instrumental recitals and performances. Fortunately, my daughter’s current piano teacher really moves them along, and the other kids’ instruments do not have recitals. At least instrumental recitals do not require expensive costumes and admission tickets!

7

I remember all of my dance recitals quite fondly. My dance school was never big on so much glitz (that was always for those other schools that existed mainly for the stage parents to get their jollies out of dressing up their poor children) and they never charged admission for recitals that I recall, though you did have to request tickets in advance. The costumes for the really little kids were a bit elaborate, but they’re just there to have fun, more or less. Playing dress-up is part of that. Sequins are fun. Of course, as you got older, the costumes did get much simpler and reusable – you’d get a base leotard and toss some accessories over top for different numbers.

Maybe switching to a different dance school, if possible and if your daughter still wants to tap next year, would be a good idea? As I guess you know, some studios are far better than others. I know my mom still refuses to even talk about some of the schools in our area because she doesn’t like or trust the directors.

8

As you wish.

9

Jess - we have checked out a number of schools. Unfortunately, it seems as tho in our area just about every dance school has these extravaganzas. I suspect it may in some way reflect what the majority of folk in our area desire - the superficial appearance of having accomplished something rather than actually putting in the hard work required to do something of value.

Thanks czar!

10

“Um - that should read DANCE recital. I’ll ask a mod to change it.”

That is totally Cool - the Dance recital is a Ridiculous Waste of Time & effort! I just spent an hour and a Half at my kid’s studio, JUST to be able to choose MY seat, which I can scarcely afford the $17 a shot for!! To see her dance for 5 minutes! I must say, I feel that it was the Most Stupid thing I have ever been a Part of, and I’m an old-school rock’n-roller who’s gone 45 Minutes TO The VENUE of a Rock Concert on the sale date, so that Scalpers didnt’ steal ALL the good seats!

:confused: What the ***hell *** Ever happened to :

A.) Moms (and ? Dad/s?) WHO PAY THE TEACHER/Studio Every Month, “GET IN FREE” to the Recital …?!?

2.) [what ever happened to:]The recital is Buy your Tickets ahead of Time, THEN “First Come, First Served” at the Door - what is the Point of Reserved seating, if Most EVERYONE would have selected Somewhat of the SAME seats they got, just by Showing up ON TIME the Day of Recital …?!?
:smack:
C.) I am just disgusted that this is such a Huge “deal”, instead of the FUN Show of Support & LOVE that it Ought to BE! :eek:

11

I’d rather sit through one 2 hour dance recital a year than however many softball, soccer, football games there are each season.

The $60 for a costume is a probably a lot less than all the gas, food, donations, etc. for sports.

12

I have been to one dance recital. It was for a niece of the woman I was dating. This was back in 1983.
One of the songs is STILL stuck in my head.
Let’s pre-tend we’re bun-nies

and hop hop hop a-round

but do it very quietly

'cause bunnies don’t make no sound

hop hop hop

shsss shsss shsss

hop hop hop

shsss shsss shsss

hop hop hop

shsss shsss shsss

'cause bunnies don’t make no sound.

13

I agree with sahirrnee. At least the dance recital is inside and I don’t have to sit through rehearsals – with sports, at least in our area, there seems to be an expectation that parents will attend all games and practices, regardless of the weather.

And if all of the dance schools in your area insist on big recitals, maybe you can at least find one with better instruction (so your daughter doesn’t get frustrated).

PS – I’m with you on the costumes – I’ve finally moved my daughter into a dance school that reuses costumes and only asks for a (refundable) deposit in case the girls damage then. On the plus side, I have boxes of costumes that my daughter and her friends use for dress-up. And you can probably sell them at E-Bay if you are so inclined.

14

The worst part is at the end of the recital when the dance studio owner comes out and everyone has to give her a standing ovation and one of the older students gives her a huge bouquet of flowers. Like we are supposed to thank her for charging us for tickets to a three hours snooze-a-thon so we can see our little girl on stage for five minutes. It is such a racket because every parent is afraid of being the unsupportive parent, no one will put there foot down and say enough with the overpriced costumes, and the overpriced tickets.

15

My daughter (who is now 31) had dance lessons as a young girl because she kept tripping over everything. Dance lessons did teach her to pick up her feet when she walked.

She went, over the years, to three different instructors. In each case they had the above long, boring, overdone recitals, AND, in each case the instructor was a wanna-be Broadway dancer/choreographer, who, not being given the chance to shine professionally, was living out her dreams through the children. But not really very well.

My daughter managed to dance her way into curtains, walls, etc. at every recital, frequently getting bruised. Somehow they never placed her in the middle of the group. Oh, well.

16

The OP’s kids must be 22 and 25 now. I wonder if they still dance.

17

Completely agree!

18

I have to Agree, I know it HAS to be hard to get thru To 4.5 thru 6-year-olds, but my Kid RESPECTS her Dance ‘teacher’ Immensely, and what I’ve seen is not “Coaching” of the caliber that you’d expect for the Investment … :smack:

Granted, it works out to be about $500-$600 per Year for each Dancer (including Registration Fees and Costumes/(4) Tickets) - but, still - $42 a month should buy One “Dance Lessons”, right …? :confused: I’ve watched my DD’s classes, with wonder that she’s Learned ANY of the “hip-hop” moves at all, from how it’s presented …?!

QUOTE=puddleglum;16173210]The worst part is at the end of the recital when the dance studio owner comes out and everyone has to give her a standing ovation and one of the older students gives her a huge bouquet of flowers.

Like we are supposed to thank her for charging us for tickets to a three hours snooze-a-thon so we can see our little girl on stage for five minutes. It is such a racket because every parent is afraid of being the unsupportive parent, no one will put there foot down and say enough with the overpriced costumes, and the overpriced tickets.
[/QUOTE]

19

Um, yeah. It’s not babysitting. Injuries happen often in sports. Coaches can handle the minor incidents, a parent or guardian should be on hand to handle anything more serious.

Also, every child has a bad day now and again, but the coach doesn’t have time to handle “out of the ordinary” disciplinary issues, either. Even just sitting the child out for a period of time requires someone keep an eye on them while the coaches teach the other kids. Parents should be on hand for that as well.

Sorry, as a long time rec league coach, that one touched a nerve.

20

$42/month should cover the cost of lessons? I have no kids and no knowledge of dance lessons, but 25 years ago I was paying $50/hour for private riding lessons. Group lessons were about $25-$30/hr per student. I have no idea what riding lessons are these days.

StG