A Small Stream of Invective (Regarding Traffic)

The BBQ Pit
1

Hey, motherfucker. Damn HEY MOTHERFUCKER GODDAMNIT MOTHERFUCKER MOTHER FUCKER! HEY! Whoooaaaa! God damn! Hey you stupid motherfucking son of a bitch watch where the fuck you’re going! You scared me half to fucking death over here! You! Yea YOU I’m talking to you, you goddamn stupid motherfucking SON OF A BITCH!!!

Ahem.

So, last night I’m out on my regular Tuesday night bicycle ride with my bud “Big T”. We’re on a semimajor through street (four lane) and I see this guy coming up on a side street. He’s driving a cheap-ass nasty looking old 70’s POS and looks like maybe he’s late for filming an episode of Cops. So I slow down and start to swing out wide, but as he approaches the intersection he slows down and looks at me, so I figure it’s cool to go. I mean, I did have the right-of-way and all. But as I discovered a split second later, he wasn’t actually looking at me, he was looking past me. He kept on coming out into the intersection.

A little dicey maneuvering there but I managed to avoid getting hit. “Big T” says he has no idea how he didn’t hit me – he couldn’t have missed my rear tire by more than an inch.

When we rounded the corner onto a side street I had to stop for a minute and just breathe. My legs were so wobbly from the adrenaline rush I could hardly stand!

So, that was my little adventure from last night. Hope you enjoyed it.

2

OK, OK, I get it. It’s not interesting unless you actually get hit. C’mon, surely somebody can at least pull a Nelson on me …

3

coughs

HAHA!

Actually, I feel your pain–but I have to say that lately my major traffic problem has been with cyclists. Twice in the past week I’ve almost been run over at four-way-stop intersections because cyclists in Hyde Park don’t seem to feel the need to even slow a bit at stop signs, even in areas with lots of pedestrian traffic. I couldn’t help but snigger a bit when one of those two almost got hit by a driver who was taking his turn at one of the other entrances to the intersection.

4

Your wish is but our command:

HA-HA! :points:

5

Damnable smilies! :mad: