A tale of creative swearing...

A few weeks ago in the homeless shelter where I work in London, one of our residents (and i stress, this guy was in no way typical of the people who pass through our doors) was chatting about some of the obnoxious ‘suits’ he encounters selling the Big Issue. Basically his beef was that this one particular businessman always gave hime nasty looks when he passed by, and generally was fond of strutting about with an air of superiority. In his own words:

‘I tell you, if someone acts like a cunt, I dont fuck about. I tell them straight to their face - ‘You are a cunt’. This fucker had been acting the cunt… and if some fucker acts a cunt then Im gonna cunt them… ‘You fucking cunt’, I said’

Keeping a straight face wasnt easy… anyone else encountered swearing as creative as that before? I swear I have never heard the word ‘cunt’ as a verb before… the english language is truly a beautiful thing.

Indeed it is!

Mind you, ‘Big Issue’ vendors do tend to have a language and culture unto themselves, so congratulating the English language for their creativite use of inflective may be inappropriate!!!


Well, people’ve started using the word “fuck” as a noun (“You stupid fuck”), so I guess anything’s fair game, you assholing jackass.

I don’t think he was using it as a verb.


A: Can I help you, sir?

B: Don’t you “sir” me!

A: Sorry, madam.

In this case B isn’t really using the word “sir” as verb. The words “say” and “to” are omitted but implied.

Anyway, you must never have listened to any Derek and Clive. (Peter Cook & Dudley Moore). Sample.

And welcome to the Boards, while I’m at it! Boy, we’re just gettin’ the young’uns, ain’t we? :smiley:

Desmo - I disagree, I think he was using it as a verb… ‘I cunt them’ is a far cry from "don’t ‘sir’ me’. In his usage, the verb ‘cunt’ simply means to call someone a cunt. Damn, this is a heavyweight debate isn’t it!

And yeah, i have heard some ‘derek and clive’ before. Funny shit!

As to the insults, well mr SPOOFE: I would never stoop to that level, you geriatric gimp festival.

Ki42, I disagree. “I’m gonna cunt them” was shorthand for “I’m gonna call them a cunt”, which is exactly what he did.


Listen pal, the Muppet’s Christmas show stopped auditioning months ago:rolleyes:

Aw, come on. You use the words “creative swearing” in the thread title and you aren’t even gonna try?

At least try “anti-anthimerialist”.

Shut it Des, you know you aint nothin but a stinky little pseudo- greek, taint felching gerbalist bitch.


That’s better. And BTW, “anthimeria” is the name of the phenomonon you described, i.e., the use of one part of speech in place of another.




So no-one has any more tales of gratuitous obscenity? Lets hear them…

No, this isn’t the forum or the message board for gratuitous vulgarity.