I saw a carton of Lemonade in the grocery store last night. In big letters, it said, “With real fruit juice”. Um. It’s lemonade. Is there a way to make it without lemon juice?
"Nothing is more effective than our product!!"
Well that’s great, because nothing is 100% cheaper than your product, too.
"Your hair will be healthier and full of life…"
No it won’t you morons. Hair is composed of dead skin cells. It’s not going to spring to life because I put some herbal conditioner on it. And in any case, who wants their hair to be alive? Or even “full of” life?
Oh and there’s an advert for some loan company with extortionate interest rates… pikey-looking young couple moaning about bills, then they get one big loan from Sharky Finance Co. in order to pay them off. Okay, but then the bloke, with a big smile on his face, says: “We even had enough left over for a rainy day!” Riiiight, so you borrowed more money than you needed, at 20% APR, so that you could put some of it in your savings account where it earns maybe 4%. Nice move, Warren Buffett.
[QUOTE=vetbridge]
I saw a carton of Lemonade in the grocery store last night. In big letters, it said, “With real fruit juice”. Um. It’s lemonade. Is there a way to make it without lemon juice?
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Well, quite a lot of cheap lemonade in the UK has no fruit juice in it. It might have some kind of lemon extract or something. But then, in the UK, “lemonade” means stuff like Sprite or 7-Up, rather than the cloudy still (?) drink that’s called lemonade elsewhere.
[QUOTE=Colophon]
But then, in the UK, “lemonade” means stuff like Sprite or 7-Up, rather than the cloudy still (?) drink that’s called lemonade elsewhere.
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A friend from the UK explained once that he would order lemonade in a bar (pub) when he didn’t want alcohol. In the US, lemonade is lemon juice, water, and sugar. Other flavoring like strawberry/raspberry can be added as well.
[QUOTE=Omniscient]
One that’s always bugged me is the Converse Ad starring Dwayne Wade. The tag line at the end says something similar to “I fall down seven times. Get up eight.” The implication is that he’s resilient or determined or whatever. The math just doesn’t add up though, if you fall down seven times and get up seven times you’re standing…yet you then get up one more time?
Dumb and annoying. I’m guessing that somewhere along the line the ad agency and/or Converse saw the flawed logic but still decided to run with it because they needed the sense that it’s one more. That makes it willful stupidity.
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Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up. Fall down. Get up.
Seven and Eight. “Get up” in this case just means “try”. Fail seven times, try eight.
What I find interesting is that it’s an exact translation of an old Japanese saying, 七転八起, shichiten-hakki.
[QUOTE=Lizard]
It’s so bad that anytime I go to someone’s house in a city and turn on the tap people look at me funny and ask why I would want to drink that water.
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Water? Like from the toilet?
Actually, a lot of homes in old cities have a distinct and unpleasant tang to their tapwater. It’s not the source, but all the old pipes between the reservoir and the spigot.
The ads that get me most are the ones that MAY do something. May help your lose weight, may help prevent baldness, may relieve pain. Eveytime I see one of those I mentally add the word NOT after the word may. That prevents me from considering it at all.
Tom Waits Step Right Up
[QUOTE=vetbridge]
A friend from the UK explained once that he would order lemonade in a bar (pub) when he didn’t want alcohol. In the US, lemonade is lemon juice, water, and sugar. Other flavoring like strawberry/raspberry can be added as well.
[/QUOTE]
I disagree. Have you ever checked the ingredients on “lemonade” mixes like Countrytime? It’s basically sugar, preservatives, and artificial flavoring. Lemon-flavored Kool Aid.
“This product is not intended to diagnose or treat any diseae or medical condition.”-great-so why are they allowed to advertise this crap?? :smack:
[QUOTE=Agonist]
I disagree. Have you ever checked the ingredients on “lemonade” mixes like Countrytime? It’s basically sugar, preservatives, and artificial flavoring. Lemon-flavored Kool Aid.
[/QUOTE]
You’re right. Never even considered crap like that.
[QUOTE=ladybug]
The owner of one local dealership made this point in a radio ad about a year back. She explained that other dealers would definitely accept your application, but that you wouldn’t necessarily be approved. She, on the other hand, is honest with potential buyers up front. (I’ve never bought a car from this dealership, so I have no idea if that’s true or just a marketing gimmick.)
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I always :rolleyes: whenever I see some car companyh claim they’ll finance anyboby no matter how bad their credit is. Of course they will…as long as your willing to pay 20% interest.
The one that gets me is "Price is no object’. “Profit is no object” sort of makes sense at least your implying that you don’t care about profit. But “Price is no object” 
Do you really expect me to believe that you don’t care about price? Well then, you won’t mind if I give you 1 cent.
Another one from the local news: “Real News: Real People”
:smack: Damn! You mean all this time I’ve been watching made up news delivered by androids?
[QUOTE=Colophon]
**<snipped>
“Your hair will be healthier and full of life…”
No it won’t you morons. Hair is composed of dead skin cells. It’s not going to spring to life because I put some herbal conditioner on it. And in any case, who wants their hair to be alive? Or even “full of” life?
[/QUOTE]
::nervously looks at my waist-length hair::
I’m scared. I just used one of those shampoos on it this morning.
Can’t sleep. Hair has life of its own. Can’t sleep. Hair has life of its own…
[QUOTE=cochrane]
And then there’s “apply directly to the forehead.” 
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You know they’re working on a Viagra-like product, to be applied to the, well, you know.
[QUOTE=furryman]
:smack: Damn! You mean all this time I’ve been watching made up news delivered by androids?
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You didn’t hear it from me, but Couric’s a Martian and Schieffer is a half-man half-toad.
[QUOTE=5-4-Fighting]
You know they’re working on a Viagra-like product, to be applied to the, well, you know.
[/QUOTE]
Hee, hee hee. That thought did enter my mind. But what if a gent is circumcised? Will it be as effective?
Fighting Ignorance since 1973? Longer than you thought? Well how friggin’ long did you think it’d take?
“Little. Yellow. Different.” Yeah, we should all pop pills that are little, of a cool color and ‘different’. There’s a real good message in there - yeah, real good.
[QUOTE=ralph124c]
“This product is not intended to diagnose or treat any disea[s]e or medical condition.”
[/QUOTE]
Of course not. The product is intended to treat a financial condition. Too much of their money is still in your pocket.
[QUOTE=gigi]
Even the ones for the Pill patch vs the daily Pill bug me. Surely the Pill is important enough to warrant a couple of minutes a day?
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A couple of minutes? Keep 'em by the sink and pop one when you brush your teeth. We’re talking seconds here.
[QUOTE=Lemur866]
OK, OK, our steering wheel is made out of recycled milk cartons and chinese newspapers.
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Oh, that’s how the car satisfies your sense of taste. Wow. Almost 2,200 posts and this is the first time I’ve wished for a barfing smiley.
[QUOTE=Civil Guy]
“With your good credit, we’ll loan you up to $100,000 or more!”
[/QUOTE]
That has always bugged me. That statement provides almost no information. Basically, it says that $100,000 is somewhere between their minimum and maximum loan amounts. That’s it.
[QUOTE=Lizard]
Don’t even get me started on the whole bottled water “business.” How Middle America became convinced to start paying money for something they ALREADY pay to get in their own house is one of the greatest cons of our time. It’s so bad that anytime I go to someone’s house in a city and turn on the tap people look at me funny and ask why I would want to drink that water. I grab a bottle of the bottled stuff and show them where on the label it says “bottled from municipal sources in Worthington, Ohio.”
[/QUOTE]
Tapwater in some parts of the country tastes really nasty. When I was a kid, we used to visit my aunt and cousins in Pearland, Texas (it’s a suburb of Houston), every summer, and they had the grossest tapwater I’ve ever tasted. It had a weird sort of chalky taste and it was so bad that I couldn’t even stand to put ice made from that water in soda or juice.
A few years ago, my aunt was put on a strict low-sodium diet by her doctor and he actually had her buy one of those office-type water coolers because the tapwater had too much sodium in it.
So, yeah, I can understand someone with water like that buying bottled water. Even in my hometown in Oklahoma, the water can occasionally have a slightly sour taste, though it’s never too objectionable.