Let me start by saying that I’m not entirely sure what I’m even asking here, and I’m not convinced that this is the correct forum, but here goes… (Long and probably boring background info to follow).
I think I have Adult ADD. I think I’ve probably got clinical depression. My doctor says I have Seasonal Affective Disorder but I think it may be Narcolepsy.
Or maybe I’m just a Hypochondriac… Or a wannabe drug addict?
A couple of years ago, in the midst of a fairly large project (I’m a web developer) I started having major trouble staying awake. I was getting normal amounts of sleep (average 8 hours) but was finding myself asleep at the keyboard several times through the day.
It finally got bad enough that I went to the doctor. Growing up, my doctor visits were ALWAYS repariative rather than preventative, because my dad was self-employed and under-insured, so I’ve never been one of those people who goes to the doctor at the first symptom, but in this case my work was suffering and I was a bit concerned.
So the doctor ran some bloodwork, ordered a sleep monitor for me to use for a night to rule out sleep apnea, ran a few other tests, etc. In the process of questioning I realized that I had had similar difficulties in the past – all in the fall/winter. (The fall after I graduated from High School I went to get checked for Mono because I was so tired all the time).
Since the blood tests came back normal and the sleep test came back not quite normal but not indicative of apnea, the Dr. decided that I had Seasonal Affective Disorder, which meant that my serotonin/melatonin levels were screwed up by the shorter days of fall/winter.
He prescribed Fluoxetine (generic for Prozac) and after a few weeks things seemed to get better. He also gave me some Provigil (Monofidil) to use as a temporary measure while I waited for the Prozac to kick in, which took a few weeks. I continued taking the Prozac for several months.
Now… In addition to not believing in regular Dr. visits my dad doesn’t really believe in medication for things like depression, etc. I was raised with that mindset, so even though the meds were helping, I wanted to get off them if possible. The Dr. said that some people with SAD go into a remission of sorts after one season of treatment, so I stopped the meds in May and hoped for the best.
Everything seemed fine until late October (2005), when I hit a wall. So… Back to the Dr., get a new prescription, wait a few weeks for it to kick in, then things were a bit better.
Only this time, I was definately noticing the “sexual dysfunction” side effect (something that hadn’t seemed to be an issue the first time around). Things weren’t as fun with my wife as they used to be, which, ironically, made me feel just a bit depressed. The meds also didn’t seem to be helping with the sleepiness as much as the first time, so I decided to take myself off them again. This was a couple of months ago.
I still have some Provigil left over from my earlier prescription, and since that seems to be more effective than the Prozac I take one occasionally to help me get stuff done.
I’m the type of guy that likes to know everything I can about stuff that concerns me, so I’ve done a lot of web research on SAD, depression, Prozac, Provigil, etc. I’ve learned that Provigil is primarily prescribed for Narcolepsy, and so I’ve done some research on that as well. It seems to me that my symptoms match at least some of the symptoms of Narcolepsy. I don’t have Cataplexy (temporary loss of muscle control), but sleep paralysis and hypnagogic hallucinations (vivid “dreams” experienced when falling asleep) are fairly normal for me. Add to that the effectiveness of the Provigil and I think I’ve at least got a fair case for it…
Anyway…
My research has also led me to information on ADD/ADHD and especially Adult ADD, and I feel like everything I’ve learned about the condition explains my life perfectly.
I’m fairly intelligent (130-ish on the various (probably highly inaccurate) inline IQ tests), but I never did well in school. If an assignment was interesting to me, I usually did very well on it. I scored excellent results on tests in the subjects that interested me. Things that I wasn’t as interested in, though, could not hold my attention. My dad was constantly frustrated with my not “fulfilling my potential” in school.
This has carried over into my working life. I have a tremendous amount of inertia that I need to overcome to begin work on a project. If I am interrupted and thrown out of my groove, it takes forever to get back into it again. I often take a project through the difficult stage of development, and then lose interest in it and have to work very hard to force myself to complete it. From what I’ve read, these are all classic signs of ADD.
So all of this brings me to a point… Adderall is a medication that is used in the treatment of ADD/ADHD as well as Narcolepsy. I first read about it in a magazine article that indicated that businessmen are using it (illegally) to gain a competitive edge in the corporate battlefields. I was intrigued by the description of its effects and did further research. Based on everything I’ve read it would be absolutely perfect for me.
The problem is, I’m afraid to approach my doctor about it. I fear that his reaction will be either:
“This guy is a hypochondriac. He’s done all this internet research and convinced himself that he has these diseases.”
(I worry enough about being diagnosed as a hypochondriac that when I had an intense localized pain in my right side that I was sure was appendicitis, I completely refrained from saying anything to the Dr. other than “my side hurts”. His questions and an MRI led to the same diagnosis, but I wasn’t the one who suggested it, so I’m not a hypochondriac!)
or:
“This guy just wants some Adderall, so he’s made up these symptoms in the hopes that I’ll prescribe him some. Maybe he wants the amphetamines for himself, or maybe he wants to sell them.”
Now, logically, I realize that neither of these responses is very likely. My Dr. has absolutely no reason to think that I’m a closet drug dealer. He’s very friendly. He has an excellent bedside manner. He is very good at explaning things in a way that is neither patronizing nor arrogant. I don’t think I could ask for a better doctor.
So maybe that’s a question right there… I know there are a few Dr. Dopers here. Please reassure me. If a patient were to come to you and explain what I’ve just explained and ask for an Adderall prescription, what would your response be?
And I guess the other question would be is there any reason NOT to take Adderall? Assuming it would be as effective in treating my symptoms as I hope it would be, would there be any risks or potential problems that may outweigh the benefits?
If you’re still reading after all of that rambling, bless you. This is my second post since joining (though I’ve been lurking as a non-member for months) and the first thread I’ve started, and I’m afraid that I’ve already established my long-windedness.
TIA for any/all responses!