This is a somewhat long story…my apologies.
This guy who’s a friend of a friend asked me out back in April. We went on a first date…everything was fine…we decided to do it again, then he cancelled saying he had a lot of shit to deal with, I said I understood and to text me whenever he wanted to do something. Later I found out two of his friends had died. I texted him about two weeks later saying I’d heard he’d been through a lot, that I understood, I just wanted to give him his space, etc. He called me back a few hours later and we arranged the second date, which ended up being nearly a month after the first one.
The second date seemed to go well and he kissed me at the end and said it would be less than a month between seeing each other again. Then I find out ANOTHER person died (they work in a dangerous occupation)…offer my condolences…he says thanks. Otherwise my only interaction with him was commenting on something else he posted on Facebook (and he responded).
I finally called him and asked if he wanted to do something at the end of this week or next week and there was kind of a pause and he told me how he was just kind of overwhelmed, he told me all the stuff he was doing this week/weekend and there was kind of another pause and I asked if I should text him and he said no, he would call me next week.
Disclaimer: I know you guys obviously don’t know this person at all and that it’s hard to give advice when one is a third party who doesn’t understand the situation.
I’m just so confused by the mixed signals he’s sending and am wondering if I did something wrong/he’s not interested but doesn’t know how to say it? To compound the issues, he’s definitely given off the impression that he has some sort of problem with depression which is compounded by various life situations, not to mention 3 people have died in the past two months. That’s why I don’t want to blow him off…after the two weeks we didn’t speak he thanked me for being considerate and said most girls would have blown him off. And I can understand being so completely overwhelmed/wrapped up in my own shit that I have trouble dealing with other people.
We have lots of mutual friends…his friend who normally discusses girls with him (and is the one who introduced us- although it was not for the purpose of dating- the guy came back later and asked me out, via a note of all things) says he has been completely mum on the subject of me…his other good friend is similarly in the dark.
I just have a lot of trouble finding decent people and think this guy is smart, funny, intriguing, extremely attractive…yadda yadda…which is why I’m so hung up on him…I just can’t figure out if he’s trying to get rid of me or not.
Thanks to all who read this…I hope it’s not terribly boring.