Did a guy in a mask adopt you and teach you to be a crime fighter?
…and here’s your Internet. #
When I was a kid it was the Golden Era of McDonald’s characters: Ronald, Grimace, the Hamburglar, Mayor McCheese, The Professor… his honor many many others. They had action figures and puppets and Christmas ornaments and other merchandising of these characters.
And I loved a Big Mac. Used to dream of the day when I would be grown up and have my own money and wouldn’t have to eat meat and vegetables and potatoes and salad all the time but could buy a whole bag full of Big Macs anytime I wanted.
But I really don’t think that the advertising had anything to do with why I liked McDonalds. I liked it because they were good burgers. I was a very materialistic kid who wanted every toy he saw on commercials like most kids, but I don’t think I ever once craved a Big Mac because Ronald Pennywise of Clan McDonald was in the sewers offering them to me and my friends.
I’ve been reading this thread since it popped back up this morning, and I somehow missed that not only is it a zombie, but I made a post to it that I don’t even remember making. So when I saw your post I got ten kinds of confused.
But thank you. 
At least he didn’t make me say Happy Birthday to a bunch of creepy old people.
I’m old enough to remember when the Grimace was the Evil Grimace. Seriously, that was the character’s name.
My father was a Ronald McDonald when I was a kid. This was back when a Big Mac came in a folded cardboard box, wrapped in waxed paper surrounded by a paper ring. He did McDonald’s store openings for Missouri and Kansas and even some local McDonald’s commercials. Somewhere along the line I lost them, but I used to have a pair of his red and white stripped Ronald socks.
This was not his main job. He was an officer of the Kansas City, MO Police Department, running the Officer Friendly program. On weekends and holidays he was a magician and Punch and Judy puppeteer. And weekday mornings and afternoons he did drivetime traffic reporting for WDAF.
I was going to say, Ronald’s no fun since they shit-canned the Mayor, Big Mac, Captain Crook, and the Professor. The Grimace and Birdie are still around, but they don’t do anything any more, they just “promote multiculturalism” and other lame shit. Bring back McDonaldland!
This post has been shaken by the Handshaker!**
Their commercials back in the '70s used to be little 30 second to 1 minute stories: Captain Crook with a cunning little scheme to steal a Big Mac from Ronald or Hamburglar getting away again. I doubt most people under 30 could recognize anybody but Ronald and Grimace from this lineup.
I guess the fall of the Brothers Kroft took down McDonaldland as collateral damage.
What about the Fry Kids? I’m 26 and I recognize those guys.
Cyanide or beheading?
When I was three years old, Chuck E. Cheese terrified me. I say get rid of tht oversized rodent.
A SEAL team is being sent to his compound in McBurgerbad.
Is the “Hamburglar” still alive?
He has released tapes from his compound though some doubt their authenticity.
First they came for Osama Bin Laden, next Ronald McDonald.
8 year old: " I want a big mac"
Parent: “no, you had one last week.”
Problem solved.
Is that Jesus in the back left?
Money is money. It’s neutral. And this is just another example of whackjobs letting religion get in the way of reality.