Al-Queda reached into the shower this morning while I was rinsing soap out of my eyes and cranked the handle all the way over to COLD!
Bastards!
Or maybe it was my wife…
And they made me spell “Al-Qaeda” wrong!
Double bastards!!
al-Qaeda was responsible for Jets WR Chrebet getting injured at preseason, and Testaverde getting turf toe in the first game in 1999!
They, they planted that girl in Kobe Bryant’s hotel room!
And, and they also put Jayson Blair in the New York Times!
And they are responsible for continuing the Curse on the Red Sox, previously maintained by Babe Ruth, Yogi Berra, Joe Dimaggio, Enos Slaughter, Mickey Mantle, Bob Gibson, Pete Rose, Bucky Dent, Mark McGuire, Mookie Wilson, Wade Boggs, Bernie Williams, Derek Jeter, and Roger Clemens.
Al-Qa’ida wants me to buy Viagra and get a bigger penis.
Two al-Qaeda sleeper agents were put in charge of directing The Battle of Shaker Heights.
Al-Qaeda is responsible for my aunt’s gout!
Or was that Caspar Weinberger?
Read between the lines: They found a rotting corpse floating in your water supply.
[sub]I bet you WISH it was Al Qaeda now, eh?[/sub]
All right… Well, can I blame my wife’s affair on the Bogeyman anyway?
Bah, everyone knows it was the freemasons under the direction of the trilateral commission.
Does Al Qaeda have 1920’s death rays?
Al Qaeda stole my car keys!
Again!
Al-Queda turned me gay!
(No, wait - they didn’t. Never mind.)
Esprix
Hmmm, looks lie al qaeda delayed the N train 15 minutes this morning.
I played poker with Osama just last week, and he took all my money. The guy’s a fuckin’ baracuda at No-Limit Hold 'Em.
Who’da guessed?
Happy
Al-Queda is responsible for the SoBig virus that keeps jamming up my e-mail address.
UGH! Where is Big Brother when you need him?
Al Qaeda turned me into a newt!
–I got better.
Al-Qa’ida made me watch Sex and the City.