Aliens only abducted cows and stupid folk?

Why does it seem only the stupid people and cows get picked! I want to get taken by Aliens … I never seen a ufo and I have the IQ of a pop tart. This is on my bucket list.

It’s the difference between necessary and sufficient. They took only stupid people and cows, but not all the stupid people and cows.

I think I might be drunk. But I still love aliens and pop tarts.

Cows are nice. I forgot to say that in my last post.

Because brains are beside the point if you’re just going to eat them anyway.

Oh I do not like the sound of that! I want to come back alive so I can go on Jerry Springer and talk about it.

Those “flashing lights” and then a “bright, white light” in the face means the cops came and you were arrested. This is also why you left the police station with a paper-bag suit, because you were arrested naked in the first place.

This is also why nobody gets to see a craft (police car) land in the middle of Broadway in NYC. :smiley:

They take cows because it’s a bitch to get their spaceship through the McDonald’s drive thru. :smiley:

Or anal-probe them…

Anal-probing brains must present some difficulties.

They just make sure to only abduct buttheads.

We’ve reached the limits of what anal probing can teach us.

[Spaceman, oh, Spaceman,
come rescue me,
from this.

Calling all aliens,
come rescue me!](

I’m ruminating that posters cud think this is another opportunity to milk this thread for all it’s worth with more cow puns.

I seen a youtube video claiming aliens are meeting with Obama. I hope they are furry. Youtube also has video claiming Obama is in fact a reptile/ alien who is able to change shapes. Oh and he is Satan . That is one complex man.

You shouldn’t post things like that. You’re going to get visited by the folks from the Skinwalker Ranch, and if you do, you’ll never be allowed back.

Seriously, they watch this board, carefully. We’ve had people disappear before. They’re here one day, posting away, and the next, they’re gone, never to be heard from again.

No, no, smart people get taken, too. They only return the stupid ones.

I do not want to go to skinwalker ranch.

well they are cute little things. I would go once.

You know, there are a lot easier ways to get anal-probed. I am pretty sure that it was the entire motivating factor behind the development of both cable tv and the internet.