If you leave out the soy milk, Kahlua, and ice you can fit a lot more vodka in there, and no need to stir. Little tip I picked up.
EXCELLENT! I mean, I drink this right before work, it’ll be perfect.
I’ve been told breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Cheers!
I actually came in to thank you for using the correct spelling of “come” instead of that horrendous junior-high, porno-mag neologism.
Anyway, rice milk is usually pretty thin, though it’s also usually too sweet for me. I prefer soy milk to regular milk for a beverage, but I prefer regular milk on cereal. I agree that they are completely different drinks. I much prefer the soymilk that comes in the unrefrigerated tetra pak to kinds like Silk that come in refrigerated milk carton packages–the latter take away the delicious soy flavor and try unsuccessfully to taste more like milk. Fail.
Oh, I understand now. Come is your euphemism for cum. That’s very ladylike of you!
Hooker sounds so vulgar. I’m sure the elves would call it húicéir, or something cool like that, so there’s no shame in it. If the elves really look like Orlando Bloom, I might even consider the job. I’m going to give almond milk a try before I commit to it though.
Just remember, it only feels like elf come. You’ll have to find something else if you want to experiment with the taste.
I think almond milk is gross too, but not because of the consistancy… i think it has a nasty aftertaste.
I’m convinced that all the people that have reccomended almond milk to me over the years are playing some kind of elaborate trick on me…
" When a mommy Elf and a daddy Elf love each other very very much… "
I am quite the lady. I suppose that is rather contradicted by me knowing what a limp biscuit is, though.
Isn’t 2% milk just really cloudy water?
Thanks, love, now my elf come thread is two pages. Anyhoo, 2% milk is a deliciously refreshing drink.
Yes, completely accidentally. It’s not as if any of us have memorized the URL addresses of the top twenty-three elf porn sites as rated by the International Elf Porn Society, which is also something I’ve never heard of.
I like Blue Diamond unsweetened, personally. I think the texture is a good mimic of milk. The taste isn’t remotely like milk, but I like it better. Less cloying.
So the full term is “elven circle jerk”?
My own threshold for common dairy milk is at 1%. Skim just has the wrong mouthfeel and taste but 1% just makes it. As others have said, part of the trick with the alternative substitutes is to not expect them to be the same, but deal with them in their own right. Though the vodka with or without Kahlua also helps.
I must say, Anaamika, this thread title is just killer. You know it will live on. May even become a Board meme.
What we need now is to try and do a bit of memetic insurgency and spread into the fantasy fandom the notion that Elven emission does best resemble sweetened almond milk.
(I wonder how well a DVD titled “Bukkake at Rivendell” would sell…)
You don’t get to change the spelling just because you don’t like it. If you did, I’d lop off all those unneeded letters at the end of French words.
How the hell do you even milk an almond? I don’t see any nipples, and I looked really carefully.
She can too, and so can I! I despise the word “cum.” it’s just too damn cutesy for its own good.
If all those rappers get to change the spellings of words, then so do Anaamika and I. 
Feel free to lop anything you like off French words. I won’t tell. 
Well, if you were a business, you could create any kind of bizarre, eye-catching spelling deviations you want. You could, e.g., name your store something like “Kum&Go”.