I lost my mother a couple of weeks ago. There were the usual cards and flowers sent - beautiful, of course, and much appreciated. Mom loved fresh flowers.
My family got the most use out of the following, however:
- Toilet paper
- Paper plates, paper napkins and plastic cutlery
- Help moving stuff
The cash mostly came to me from family members and was desperately needed. Mom lived 700 miles away from me so not only did we have to do a hotel for a few nights, but we had to drop 500 bucks on a big moving truck to take most of Mom’s stuff back home with us.
Toilet paper usage goes up a lot when someone dies because of visitors. The paper plates, etc. kept us from having to do dishes and the food goes without saying. Kentucky BBQ + BBQ sauce + buns = NOM NOM NOM. It was quick and easy and we could warm it up whenever we wanted and we could eat as we got hungry.
An old, OLD friend from waaaay back came down and helped us move mom’s stuff into the moving truck on a very muddy and rainy day and, at one point, drafted his father-in-law to come help with a particularly heavy object. He saved us hours of work.
So anyway I thought I’d start a thread - creative alternatives to sending flowers to the bereaved. Please, please don’t think I’m disparaging flowers or complaining about having received flowers. I’m not thinking real straight these days and my writing skills, usually fairly sharp, are kinda screwy. I just thought this would be a neat go-to guide for all of us Dopers the next time words are failing us and we just want to DO something for those who are dealing with death.
So … have at it. What helped you and yours when you were going through something like this?