So I’m hanging out with this woman, we’re drinking beers and watching a movie. The movie stars Brendan Frasier, someone she has an enormous crush on. She’s been making little innuendos through the whole thing. Then the movie ends and she turn to me and says “So, are you a grown man?” My train of thought doesn’t just get derailed, it hits a brick wall. Suddenly I’m talking like Porky Pig “Uh… I er… ummm… that is… what did you say?” She just smirks and says “Nothing…” Yeah right. So I gotta sit there and pretend I didn’t hear anything. I fidget. I squirm. I think better of it and go back to fidgeting. Finally I decide to go get another beer. I really need another beer. Except she follows me out there. She waits until I’ve opened the beer and started to tip it back for a swig, I could swear she did this intentionally for comic timing, then she says “Wow, my (ahem!) is really wet!” Insert spit take here. “I…<cough> gwuh… <cough, cough> say what?” She doesn’t say anything, just smirks again. I tip back the beer for another swig when she says “No really, it’s like, dripping down my leg!” <cough, sputter, choke, gasp> “Habzebuhgwuhzie?” She just smiles and says “Nothing.” In the most innocent voice she can muster. Then she walks back into the other room like nothing happened. The rest of the evening passes without event. But suffice to say I’m a tad bit distracted waiting for the other shoe to drop. It doesn’t. She hangs out for another hour and leaves like nothing happened. But, the next day at work I see her whispering to a friend of hers, I can just tell what’s about to happen. I’m not dissapointed. When they’re about to close up I get ready to leave. But as I walk out the door I hear one of them yell “Hey Michael! You want a present? It’s soft and wet. You’ll like it!” I pretend I didn’t hear them and hurry out the door to the sound of them laughing hysterically. I’m only glad neither one of them took their clothes off, or I probably would have run screaming.
Is there some kind of twelve-step program for this kind of thing? The situation at work is only getting worse. I’d like to beat them at their own game but every time one of them makes their little comments I completely blank, much to their enjoyment. Even worse, it seems to be catching amongst all of my other female friends as well. It sucks. Especially since I know none of them would actually follow through, they just enjoy seeing me blush. So, what the hell do I do?
I can’t. Don’t ask me why, because I don’t know, I just can’t take that initiative. That’s the very reason they enjoy teasing me so much. It’s not that I’m shy, I’m anything but shy. I just can’t.
How about telling them you’d love to help them out of their obviously desperate situation, however, the last woman you “helped” is still in the hospital recovering from exhaustion & it wouldn’t be fair to give the nursing staff any extra work.
Just smile naturally to them - u didn’t do anything wrong. At least u’re not the one who should be embarrassed, am I not wrong? They’ll get over it soon. If they really had so much time on such a little minor irrelevant incident, then u’re just doing them a favour of relieving their boredom - and you should be proud! Just don’t feel embarrassed and they won’t think you are embarrased.
Jesus H. Christ on spike heels, what a trashy tart!
I mean, I can flirt like nobody’s business (I was captain of my high-school flirting team, and qualified for the 1980 Olympics), but I have rarely heard such unappetizing, vulgar and just plain cheap-ho come-on lines!
You are well rid of her, she’d have had you in the Clap Clinic for a month . . .
The only solution to this problem is jump right in. Show them you are not afraid of them. Next time you get an offer, suggest you go to the copier room or to a motel or your car or somewhere private. If they take you up on it then go for it. If they do not then they will be the ones blushing, either way you win.
Actually, to be truthful, she probably isn’t nearly as promiscuous as she’d like me (and others) to think. I think it’s become the fad for women to be sexually aggressive. And she’s just following the cool image. And they weren’t come-ons, I’d be damn surprised if she (or any of them, for that matter) were actually interested in me in that way. They just like seeing me blush. I can’t help it, I’m a red-head. My face is like a billboard advertising whatever I happen to be feeling at the moment. They think it’s cute. But not cute in the sexy way. More like “Awwwwww, what a cute widdle puppy!”. Which ain’t exactly good for my ego.
If you like them, and their attention, don’t follow this advice, otherwise, tell them:
“This qualifies as sexual harrassment in the workplace. Leave me alone or I will file a report with my supervisor.”
Of course, this is dramatic action, but it depends on how much the situation is bothering you and your state of mind. I would only do it as a dramatic last resort.
Wow that sucks. What a skeez - seriously, I agree with Eve. She is not worth your worry. I hate girls like that - they give us all a bad rep. I mean, ick. Ick ick ick.
As for your work buddies, just ignore them. It sounds stupid, but having been teased by my friends about every one of my indescretions, I can honestly say that if you ignore them, it will go away.
I had a similar situation during my first semester at school. I was in a Lit. class I adored, and I had read most of the material we covered (short stories, poems, etc.) So I volunteered a lot and got perfect scores on the test. It’s easy for me - I love reading and literatue. So anyway, my Prof. asked me to meet him after class to discuss the Honors program, which he wanted me to join. I went and I guess some kids in the class saw me, and re-christened me “Monica,” if you get my drift. Next thing you know, teasing is happening in class, in front of other professors(it was a learning community, five classes together). I thought I would die, I have never been so humiliated. At first I fought back and they egged me on more. Finally, I said, “fuck you” and shut up about it, and they left me alone. Several “friends” had teased me too, and I quickly demoted their status in my address book. Asses.
The moral of the story is, if you don’t give them anything to work with, they will lose interest. If anyone addresses you privately, you might say, “I only go for girls with class” or something to the effect. But otherwise, let them titter all they want but keep your back straight. Fuck 'em.
Hostile work environment! Sue that bitch!
(you won’t win, but, hey, what the hell?!)
In what grade do you ‘work’? Her behavior is juvenile and very unattractive. She is the pathetic one in this situation. I feel a bit sorry for her. Whoever gets that prize is gonna be one lucky man! not.
Not so easy for me. I find it difficult to be rude, and besides which, it’s impossible for me not to feed into it. Like I said, it shows all over my face. I can’t tell myself not to blush, it just doesn’t work.
And I won’t file sexual harrassment and they know it. I’m not that mean. I did bluff once and suggest that maybe I would complain of sexual-harrassment. Her reply was “Oh yeah? You think that’s sexual-harrassment? Uh-uh. I’ll show you sexual harrassment…” She made me wish I’d never said that.
I know what you mean Luci. Except that when I suggested sexual harrassment she didn’t even take me that seriously. She just smirked and said yeah right.
No, you didn’t have to ask. And I’m not even going to bother answering, since the answer is rather obvious. It’s just yet more reason that she gets off on jibing me.
- u didn’t do anything wrong. At least u’re not the one who should be embarrassed, am I not wrong? They’ll get over it soon. If they really had so much time on such a little minor irrelevant incident, then u’re just doing them a favour of relieving their boredom - and you should be proud! Just don’t feel embarrassed and they won’t think you are embarrased.