Your pain is funny.
My pain is real.
Well, maybe we’re just giving you the benefit of the doubt, assuming you actually couldn’t be stupid enough to think that the Darwin Awards are really there to ‘commemorate’ and ‘applaud’ the deaths of people’; that surely you know that whole thing is meant to be funny. Stop trying to prove us wrong.
I just wish they’d retire the died-while-trying-to-steal-copper-wire category. There seem to be two such entries every month: one guy who gets electrocuted and one guy who falls. Enough already.
And the same goes for tried-to-break-in-somewhere-and-got-stuck.
oh alice…
From your site Guin
Could some guy hack of some other guy’s head with an axe? Sure. Could some guy hack of his own head with a chainsaw? I seriously doubt it.
Sure he could. Once he sets the chainsaw in motion, it’s inertia would carry it through the cut. No, I’m not going to demonstrate.
Q.E.D. - I’ve used a chain-saw - you still have to apply some force, and you have to push down the “activation mechanism” How the hell am I supposed to know what it’s called?!?!
Anyhow - I’m thinking as soon as the blade touched your neck, you’d quit holding the button and the saw would bounce off - you have to use a fair bit of force to keep the thing straight - could you nick yourself enough to bleed to death? Sure. Could you cut your head clean off as described in the story? Nah, I don’t think so.
Well, maybe it’s proof that we remain conscious for a nanosecond after decapitation?
I dunno. I’ve heard of coroners needing to pry things out of the hands of corpses because they had what’s colloquially termed a “death grip” on them. I suppose the fool wielding the chainsaw could conceivably hold down the trigger through the cut. Most of the neck is soft tissue and easily cut. Say, anyone out there willing to settle a bet?
Don’t you think the Polish guy thought this thing through? I’m certain he probably had something to tie down the throttle of the chainsaw when he cut his head off. THINK people! 
To bring the thread back on track…
I’m glad I’m not only person somewhat disturbed by the Darwin Awards. If it does in fact consist of real life deaths I think it’s extremely disrespectful. Maybe I’m old fashioned or just plain nuts, but I always thought that there should be a certain amount of respect given to the dead, even if they are complete strangers.
And a lot of the mistakes they made that led to their death are not even acts stupidity. Sometimes it’s just accidents that resulted from clumsiness or just plain bad luck.
Hey, why don’t we make fun people that die in car accidents while we’re at it? I mean, what the hell kind of idiot doesn’t stop at a stop sign? LOL, he deserved to die to making a mistake that stupid.
If my sister died under unusual and somewhat entertaining circumstances i wouldn’t want anyone, better yet random strangers making fun of her. I wouldn’t want my sister’s death to be a funny anecdote so that the world can laugh at her death.
I mean they’re dead. Do we really need to rub it in?
(note: I actually enjoy dark humor because it’s fiction. )
Hard to believe this went to a second page, or worse, that I read the whole thing. pizzabrat, you started with the assumption that anyone applauded the death of another. When most of the other posters tried to tell you it wasn’t applause, but laughter you still insisted on your premise.
I remember the one about a burglar who tried to break into a store of some kind through a skylight by lowering himself down by a rope looped over his feet and slung over a pully, thereby avoiding the alarm system which he knew was only attached to the windows and doors. Since his hands were occupied with the rope he stuck his long, thin flashlight in his mouth so he could see where he was going. Somehow he lost his grip on the rope, dropped face-first to the floor and drove the flashlight into his brain. The owner of the store found him dead the next morning. Now, I didn’t applaud that poor schnook’s death, but I laughed my ass of at the manner of it.
Hell, if most people couldn’t laugh at stupid folks Bill Engvall would starve to death.
DesertGeezer: But rarely are Darwin Awards deaths that sort of poetic justice.
I would. I love my sister to death, and would chose my own death over hers without a second thought, but if she did something stupid enough to be a Darwin award winner, I’d laugh. I’d laugh through the tears because she’s my sister, but I’d laugh. Ironicly. Painfully.With full realization of what I’d lost. But I’d see the humor.
The thing that bothers me most is not the disrespect for the dead (although that does kind of bother me) but fact that it’s couched in language of social engineering through genetic cleansing. Every time I see some slob laughing and cheering at someone who “removed themselves from the gene pool” I think “Oh yeah, your genes are so much more worthy of preservation than some anonymous stranger’s. Your contribution to our species is simply vital. He was the one bringing us down with his genes, not you with your postmodern Brave New World dystopian master-race fantasies. Just keep telling yourself that, asshole, it’ll all be over soon.”
I admit, I usually laugh as hard as anyone when I read about the Darwin Awards, so I sure don’t condemn anyone who finds them amusing.
But every so often, I’ll read one that makes me say, “Hey… my friends and I used to do stupid things like that all the time when we were kids.” And then, for a moment at least, it’s not so funny.
How many of us have NEVER attempted a ridiculous stunt that could have ended in disaster? Most of us escape more-or-less unscathed, perhaps just a little embarrassed, and get to laugh at ourselves later. But every now and then, someone gets killed doing the same thing.
I’m not trying to be a party pooper here. As I said, I’ve laughed at those stories myself. It’s just worth remembering that MOST of us could have been fodder for such posts, and still could be.
Darwin Awards are stupid in my opinion. Not the idea of cleaning the gene pool, but…
…the hilarity this ensues. Three words: stupid, ghastly, tragic. I imagine you also laugh when you see someone trip and land on their face. And the comical value of a home video depicting a well placed kick in the balls is priceless. :rolleyes:
Yes, yes I do. Tripping is funny.
I laugh at myself when I fall.
If you can’t laugh, well, what else CAN you do?
Which begs the question, why must you do anything? If I trip and fall I’ll shrug it, maybe smile to the cute girl with the worried look standing on the corner. Anyway a few suggestions if I may:
[ul]
[li]Help.[/li][li]Not humiliate someone who is probably embarassed already, especialy if said person is not agile enough to get swiftly back on his/her feet.[/li][li]Edumacate the snickering kids standing beside you.[/li][li]Not send the stupid story to the stupid Darwin Awards.[/li][/ul]
Different points of view I guess.
:dubious:
I really don’t get it. I’m not a surly guy, honest! I made my point, I’m out.
Sure you’re out. You got your dose of “I’m superior” for the day, so fuck those who disagree.
Look, sport, there may be a few people in here who really think eugenics is a good idea, and there may be a doper or two that would actually applaud the death of somebody stupid enough to do himself in accidentally. But there are certainly a great many Dopers who know how to laugh at the stupid shit in life and not take it – ir themselves – too seriously. Lighten up already. You’ll live longer.
Of course, since you had your say and opted out of this thread, you won’t read this. Your “superiority” won’t be disturbed. Good for you.
“Edumacate?” :rolleyes: