I used to do snake and lizard handling sessions, and heard some pretty bad ones- including the little kid holding one and and excitedly saying ‘Mum, I can feel its bones!’, and his mother snapping back ‘Don’t be stupid, snakes don’t have bones.’
Browsing in our local Books A Million I overheard a clerk ask the assistant manager why they carried multiple copies of the same book. The AM said, “I know! Between Evanovich and those Dragonlance we don’t have any spare room!” :smack:
Wow, genius. What happens if somebody actually buys a book?
My daughter overheard this one yesterday, at a used book store…a teen boy was browsing in the philosophy section, and an older adult woman (presumably his mother) told him not to bother, that they had a Bible at home and that would be all he’d ever need.
Last summer I was walking with a fellow traveler in Venice as we dragged our suitcases up, across and down what felt like a hundred little bridges over many canals on our way from our apartment to pick up a bus to take us to the airport for our flights home.
As we lugged our suitcases down the last set of steps on the last bridge, she said, “I can’t understand why this place has so many bridges. They should at least get rid of the ones on the way to the airport.”
[Insert that WTF emoticon here]
I’ve come across this myth a few times. The people weren’t stupid, just not very zoologically knowledgeable. They found it pretty interesting when I explained how snakes can have all those bones while being so twisty.
But wouldn’t they see the store name upon entering?
I never knew snakes had bones either…until now:eek:!
I did that, too. It was a joke.
German tourist at Mesa Verde: “Where are all the people?”
She genuinely didn’t understand that we have vast open spaces in this country with very few people living in them.
“black squirrels come from Africa”
I would totally do that if I I knew my friend was unfamiliar with the story.
Now I’m filled with a sudden desire to bust out incorrect statements in public places and then see if this thread reports any of them.
Reminds me of the time someone “asked Doctor Science” if snakes have tails. DS replied (correctly): “Snakes don’t have tails. Snakes are tails.”
.
I couldn’t come up with some things as dumb as a few of these if I tried!
Yes, they would. But if someone has already been in a dozen stores that day, s/he perhaps can be forgiven if s/he doesn’t remember just WHICH Big Department Store s/he’s in right now. Especially during the Shopping Season (which some people still claim is a religious holiday), with the attending frantic atmosphere. Even though there are SOME differences between the different stores, for the most part they all sell basically the same stuff. Yeah, some stores sell their own house brands, but you’re going to find Levi’s and Wranglers jeans in just about any store that sells jeans, for instance. It gets to the point where all you care about is ticking off another purchase on the old gift list, and you’re doing good to remember your own damned name, let alone the name of whatever interchangeable store you’re in.
And this, folks, is yet another reason why I do my Xmas shopping early, and online if at all possible.
Bears gotta eat something.
Many years before 9/11, flying into New York at night, I was listening to the guy with the Texas accent behind me explaining the geography to his daughter:
“Yep, that’s the Hudson River down there…” (Not exactly, it’s Long Island Sound)
“…and those twin towers over there–that’s the National Trade Center!” (WORLD Trade Center! Sheesh!)
Of course, a dear friend of mine who grew up in Brooklyn was finally allowed by his folks to take the subway into Manhattan when he was about fourteen. He and his friends got off at what they hoped was the correct stop and asked the first guy they saw “Um, can you tell us where Manhattan is?”
“(Raised eyebrow) You’re standing in it.”
“Uh, thanks, can you tell us where 34th Street is?”
“(Raise other eyebrow) You’re standing ON it.”
“Oh, then how about the Empire State Building?”
“(Disgusted sigh) Look up.”
I have this mental picture of her being just slightly annoyed, in the stereotype of the stiff-necked German who hates being puzzled or surprised, and it comes out this way: “Vehr are all ze PEEPUL???”
These are priceless. Welcome to the South, y’all. Whether literally or figuratively.
I am having a flashback to high school biology where a classmate insisted that a man has one less rib than a woman.
Exchange between Stupid Roommate and myself:
“Why do we call our language ‘English’?”
“Well, who did we fight in the Revolutionary War?”
“What the hell does that have to do with anything!?!?”
:smack:
Also said by above-roommate, to my (future) wife and I:
“You guys watch more channels above 22 than anybody I know!”
(Channel 2-22 were typical entertainment channels - NBC, HBO, ESPN, TNT, etc… 23 and above were special-interest cable channels like History, Discovery, etc.)