American Airlines: mebbe bankruptcy was the right idea

The BBQ Pit
1

On Friday evening, I had an American Airlines flight to Chicago. Due to slowdowns caused by two accidents on the interstate on the way to the airport, I arrived at the American Airlines counter exactly 28 minutes before my flight was due to depart. Seeking to make my flight, I immediately went to the self-service e-ticket kiosk…

To discover that American Airlines does not allow the use of the self-service kiosks less than 1/2 hour before flight time. The self-service machine directed me to the ticket agent.

This, of course, is brilliant. If you are running late, you are required to use the slowest available method to get your boarding pass. I tried to think of some rationale, such as security concerns, but was stumped.

Grumbling, I got in line. It wasn’t long - about five people ahead of me - but there were only two ticket agents. There were 11 baggage carriers, waiting to place checked baggage on the x-ray machines, but only two agents. A brilliant bit of personnel management, that - the baggage carriers have effectively nothing to do until the ticket agents check the baggage, but no matter. The agents were the slowest fucks imaginable - five minutes per customer is completely unacceptable.

Just to push me over the edge, when I got to the counter and asked the agent to hurry as my flight was leaving in 15 minutes, he just stared at me … and kept me waiting another two minutes. (Extra rant sub-point: I told him my flight number, and he asked me what was my destination. Excuse me, is there an American Airlines flight 846 going to Guam?!! Just type in “846” in your computer, and you will know where the fuck I am going!!)

I finally got my boarding pass and ran to the security gate. After cooling my heels (and thinking truly unworthy thoughts) as a woman in a wheelchair got helped through security, I took off again in a desperate rush to get to the boarding gate before the doors closed. I made it with eight minutes to spare…

To find that no one had boarded yet. At first, I was angry with myself, having rushed, grumbled, and thought unworthy thoughts about the poor woman in the wheelchair for no good reason. I should have checked the departure board before starting on my headlong dash. But then I noticed something …

The departure board still listed my flight as “on time.” Here it was, two minutes before departure, no one boarded yet, but American Airlines was cheerily insisting to the world that Flight 846 from Fort Lauderdale to Chicago was, in fact going to depart on time. I couldn’t believe it. Here I had been, doing a fantastic impersonation of a headless chicken, to make a flight that was going to be on the ground for quite some time. I was pissed.

But then, I got pisseder. If American had properly announced that the flight was delayed, it would have been more than half an hour to departure time when I got to that fucking self-service kiosk, I could have gotten my boarding pass without dealing with the poltroon behind the counter. I could have walked to the security gate, smiled and made small talk with that dear woman in the wheelchair, grabbed a magazine and a drink for the flight, and tottled aboard. But nooooo, American must lie to us, instead.

Oh, by the way, guess why the flight was delayed? They were missing a flight attendant. I guess they are easy to misplace. (And no, the scheduled flight attendant hadn’t died or anything. American had just screwed up the scheduling of flight attendants.)

Sua

2

Yes, but if they announced that the flight was late, than they wouldn’t be able to tout their stellar on-time rate. Flying has become such a freaking hassle it is amazing.

To me the biggest shit is how AA ads say that they have more leg room because they have removed a row of seats. The commercials show “normal” people supposedly sitting in coach with their legs crossed. The only way I can cross my legs in coach is in the emergency exit row.

3

Sua, your experience reminds me a bit of the time I got stuck in Houston for six hours. The flight crew – pilot, copilot, flight attendants, the whole shebang – that took us into Houston was supposed to continue flying the plane into Birmingham. However, no one told them that, so when they got to Houston they simply gathered their stuff and left.

It took the airline (Delta, if memory serves) five hours to scramble another flight crew. I was supposed to get to Birmingham around 10 p.m.; I actually got there at 4:15 a.m.

4

I had a Northwest flight delayed for an hour once because “we’re looking for a pilot.” More or less direct quote. It’s always reassuring to hear things like that.

5

All airlines do this. Snowy day in Boston, trying to see how delayed my flight my be…
D_Odds: (around 10:30am) How delayed is the 1:00pm flight?
US Air: We’re showing that flight as on-time.
D_Odds: I don’t know where you’re located, but it snowing hard here. The flight will be delayed. I need to know if I need to rebook a later flight.
US Air: All I know is that the flight is currently listed as on-time.
D_Odds: (dripping sarcasm) Thank you for all you’re help.

Get to the airport at around 1:30. Flights are being cancelled left and right (the airport was eventually shut down until 7:00pm and I ended up spending the night at an airport hotel). Nothing had left since early morning, well before my call. But my flight, which had not yet been cancelled, was listed as a 45 minute delay (despite the lack of an airplane).

I’m picking on US Air because this was the most recent, but they all do this. If they told us our flight was running late, we might spend less time wasting money in airport concession stands.

6

extra points for “Pisseder” :smiley:

7

Tell me about it. I need to go back to just flying Southwest. Today, for example, I flew Continential. I’m not making that mistake again. Yo, goobers, if I wanted to shoved into a 737-300 with no leg room and given a bag of peanuts, I would’ve flown Southwest. Plus, every time I fly Southwest, my Southwest stocks go up.

Actually, the only reason I was flying Continential was because I was using the second half of a ticket when I had used the first half back in August.

8

Reminds me of flying from Norfolk to Chicago on United thirteen years ago. We had to wait two hours to board because the flight crew hadn’t left Washington D.C. yet! Grr.

9

Delta once held me up for two hours because the “Exit” sign over one of the windows didn’t work.

10

I once had a 2 hour delay because the emergency floor lighting on a brand spanking new British Midland Airbus 321 wouldn’t work in the last four rows of the aircraft. Yeah, like we’re gonna need it when we drop into the North Sea. Rules, rules, rules, of course, but it still pissed me off. Like this brand new plane with the airplane equivalent of 150 miles on the clock would suddenly crash, and if it did, those poor last 4 rows would be without an emergency light path to the nearest emergency door, which is behind them anyway.

Of course, the fact that is was only a 40 minute flight (LHR-AMS) didn’t really help.

Other than that, BMI is actually OK as far as airlines go.

11

extra points for “poltroon”.

Classy.

12

Thanks. I tried to fit “wont” into the OP, but couldn’t find the right spot.

wring, I had originally written “pissederer,” but I fortunately realized that it was not grammatically correct. :smiley:

Sua

13

We all have horror stories about customer service, insane security, and bizarro repair policies.

And I’m sure we could go on about them at some (insane) length.

But there’s a real point to be made in this thread title (well done, Sua!).

The major air carriers are simply no longer feasible business entities. The combination of deregulation, union contracts, cheaper competition, low morale, and the business cycle means these firms are on the long, slow slide to oblivion.

It’s something we should be aware of when flying and that economists should be anticipating.

Will we eventually have NO hub-and-spoke major carriers in the USA? 1? 2? 3? Will the only viable ones be the Southwests and Jet Blues of the future?

Will ‘luxury’ business travel (meals, 20% more leg room, etc) become a ‘boutique’ service that costs more and is flown on smaller gulfstream-style jets?

You make the call. But this is water running downhill right now. It’s going to hit bottom sooner or later.

14

I flew down to Sunny Orlando Florida 2 summers ago on American out of Pittsburgh with my Cousin. About halfway through the flight, a ceiling panel fell. Dangling inches above our faces. Not entirely the best thing you want to see on your first flight. But heck, getting a first class upgrade the rest of the trip was a plus.

:slight_smile:

~Sky~

15

You have no idea. My Dad’s a mechanic for American Airlines. FAA regulations are unbelievably tight.* If they’d let that plane fly, heads would’ve rolled. He occasionally gives me a rundown of the sorts of regulations he has to deal with and it’s rather astounding.

  • Yes, I know this occurred overseas and probably didn’t involve the FAA…
16

So, when were you the pissedest? :wink:

17

Just because the vast majority of the companies that currently operate airlines can’t do so at a profit doesn’t mean that it can’t be done, so I wouldn’t envision a nightmare scenario where no one is able to fly anywhere.

If any of the big airlines go down, you can bet your ass that there will be others lining up to take their place.

18

I have to agree with Jonathan here.

Sua’s OP thread, although well written and quite funny, just highlights what is a problem of major scale within the U.S. The business model and procedures of the airline industry are horrifically outmoded. The airlines continue to lose money and we (the U.S. tax payer) continue to bail them out. No one requires the corporate management of the airlines to be responsible for their actions, or inaction, demand that they adjust their business models, improve efficiencies - nothing! Just more “airline bailout money” to prop up shareholder value.

Fuckers.

Mean “Business Traveler Rage” Joe

19

Well, I agree, of course.

But what I’m saying is that what might come through this is NOT of the tradition ‘large carrier hub-and-spoke’ but instead the smaller, regional no-frills carriers.

20

I have to agree with Jonathan here.

Sua’s OP thread, although well written and quite funny, just highlights what is a problem of major scale within the U.S. The business model and procedures of the airline industry are horrifically outmoded. The airlines continue to lose money and we (the U.S. tax payer) continue to bail them out. No one requires the corporate management of the airlines to be responsible for their actions, or inaction, demand that they adjust their business models, improve efficiencies - nothing! Just more “airline bailout money” to prop up shareholder value.

Fuckers.

Mean “Business Traveler Rage” Joe