That’s the reason I’ve never gotten irked at Simon’s bitchiness. These people are wanting to enter an industry where the competition is cut-throat, the executives are assholes and the public can be blazing hot for you one minute and hate you the next. If they can’t take his jibes and jabs then they’re not cut out for show business.
Yeah, his Billie Holiday singing car commericals is brilliant. I love David Sedaris.
I’ve heard Simon defend his snarkiness by pointing out how narcissistic, ego-driven and attention seeking most of these people are. “They’re horrible people” he said. I would have to agree that for 99% of the auditioners, that’s probably true. VERY few of the people who audition have anything like professional ability and most of them have no talent whatsoever. I myself find that there is something cumultively annoying and aggravating about the number of people who with no background in singing, with no training, with no skill or talent who nevertheless feel that they are entitled to be made rich and famous simply for showing up. It grates on my nerves and I only have to see a few snippets a week. Simon and co. have to sit through hundreds, if not thousands of these auditions and raging egos.
Even a lot of the ones who make it are still egoistic and self-absorbed. I get really tired of hearing drivel about how they want to “touch other people” or “make a difference with my music.” A little bit of success can balloon those egos even more. I can easily understand why Simon has lost all patience for it. This is purely a mercenary enterprise for him. He’s looking for a cute flavor of the week that he can make a few bucks from and then move on to the next one. He’s not trying make any artistic statements or “touch” anyone. I’ve even heard him say that he would never go to a concert by any of the winners because he admits he can’t stand the material. He isn’t really picking what he likes (which seems to be stuff like Motown and oldie rock) but what he thinks will sell. He’s incredibly cynical about what kind of look and sound will be commercially viable, but I can’t say his instincts have really been wrong in that regard.
I think that the people who are obviously just trying to get on TV for a lark or win a bar bet from their friends are actually less annoying than the truly deluded ones because at least the fakers know they suck, they don’t have any illusions about it and they have a sense of humor.
There are also a precious few who are both talented and not egoistic (and those are the ones who usually make it pretty far), and those are the ones who get nothing but praise from Simon who, remember, knows how these people are off camera as well as on. I think that’s something that should be held in mind if he seems to take a dislike to somebody over the course of a show. (He never liked Scott, the Baby Mama Beater, for instance). Conversely, he went out of his way to say how much he had enjoyed working with Bo and what a decent guy he was even though Simon made it pretty clear he wanted Carrie to win.
Good analysis, Dio. You expressed my feelings nicely. Regarding what Simon likes, I think his Il Divo pretty much encapsulates it.
Yes, I think Diogenes put it pretty well. Congratulations, Sir!
Believe me, living in Nashville you don’t need television to see narcissists who feel entitled to fame and fortune but don’t know anything about connecting with an audience, being prepared, etc. The difference is that it seems even the worst amateur honky tonkers can halfway carry a tune, but I don’t see the auditions so I don’t know. But man am I tired of the Texan with the guitar he can barely play but thinks he’s in some movie like Walk the Line and he’s just cutting his teeth for a few scenes then he’ll be a big star and banging Reese Witherspoon in his spare time. Even the abundance of superior talent all around him doesn’t change his mind about his destiny.
Simon made few bones about the fact that he didn’t like Clay Aiken as a person and felt that he used the fact he worked (very briefly) with disabled kids too much for self promotion. I think he genuinely liked John Stephens (Stevens?) but basically was on to the “nice kid, nice voice, hasn’t got it, NEXT!” phase very shortly. As for his favorite music, he once said that Desperado was one of his favorite songs.
Speaking of John Stevens (Stephens?), I think there should be an age limit of at least 18 for AI auditionees, or at very least they should be required to have a HS diploma or GED. At 16 most people’s egos probably just cannot take the level of abuse received or the amount of professional dedication required for a music career.
I honestly think the “My mom thinks I sound like Britney Spears” (but she doesn’t listen to music) Squeaky Prom girl was one of the self-deluded ones rather than the 15 second chasers. I think the Like a Virgin guy was also in the “actually thought they had something” talent, and the gay black kid with the torn pantslegs who went off when he didn’t get in definitely was.
One of my former students auditioned for them in Atlanta last year and made it to Paula/Randy/Simon, but was never seen on TV. The kid has a gorgeous tenor. He’s about 6’2 and not an ounce over 130 pounds and has a huge mop of shaggy hair. He said that Simon told him “You have the best voice I’ve heard today… but there’s no way you’re going to be in Teen Magazine until you gain some weight and muscle tone.” Paula gave him a yes, Randy hedged but finally went with no for the same reason as a title- “you have the voice but not the look” and of course Simon a no. At least I know from his account (and I believe him) that they do have really good contestants who don’t get to come play and it’s not all the talentless.
Day Two - w00t! And let me start off by saying, “Happy Heidi from Hawaii” desperately needs her roots done. Gaaaaack!
I thought that Heidi would go to Hollywood, after all that trip from Hawaii.
I look and sound just like Shawn. Good thing I don’t want to sing professionally.
P.S. My ever faithful son tells me I sound much better than and don’t look like a man.
Again with my favorite song. He looks like a Chinese Cuba Gooding Jr. I hope everyone can now see how much better Luthor’s version is than The Carpenters version.
Not necessarily better, but different. I love K.C.! Don’t make me cut you …
Whoa … did Simon just call Randy harsh? When did I enter “The Twilight Zone”? And what in the heck did I do with my passport?
After watching that, I have to show you my son’s best friend in the whole wide world Clay Aiken!
I love The Carpenter’s too! But, dangit, Luthor’s version of Superstar is vastly superior to my ears.
Nobody’s talking?
I wasn’t really paying attention… what did Randy say that Simon found offensive?
I think Simon was being sarcastic because Randy and Paula were calling him mean earlier.
Randy said that the Marine’s performance looked like a circus act. Which kind of was rude, actually. Although I didn’t think he was all that good, anyway.
Oh and she’s so pretty too.
Does Randy HAVE to say “the best so far in this competition” to everybody?
Hmm … I must be on crack again, because I didn’t think Catherine was all that. Too much affectation, I think, or something. I don’t get what the judges are gushing over. … Oooooh, another commercial. I think I’ll have a heart attack and die from that surprise.
I like this 16 year old girl…
Pippi Longstocking has a really big voice for a girl her age. I kind of like her. But she might need braces. I kind if like her anyway.