Dear asshat™boss person,
Having a mullet in this day and extremely fashionable age is NOT a crime ya know.:)CG happens to be one of the few people I know who actually look good in a modified mullet.I like it when he has longish hair.It gives me something to uh…play with.:)I am writing you this pissed off rant-y letter because you made a stupid bet with him and when he lost,you made him promise to get a ‘real’ haircut,which he did and now makes him look like a dark-haired Q-tip. Seriously. I’d love it if you at least apologized for making him cut his hair.
Your honor, I’d like to provide the following evidence which shows, without a doubt, that mullets are a crime against nature, even if not a crime against man.
A bet’s a bet. Apart from the (highly questionable) asthetic claims from the OP, the winner of a wager has no obligation to apologize to the loser for collecting.
Count me in the ‘Mullets are Always a Crime’ camp.
But of course I have never seen CG and so acknowledge there may be exceptions.
I remember several incidents of people with heinous moustaches who, when shaved, looked even worse. So I am willing to reserve judgement until …
I_Dig posts Before and After pics of CG’s haircut so we can judge for ourselves.
If that’s not an option, can you address the following:
Mullets are made worse by several factors: [ul]
[li] baldness on top[/li][li] ponytail[/li][li] baldness on top COMBINED with a ponytail[/li][li] hairsprayed bangs (more of a female mullet thing, i know)[/li][li] if it looks like LegoHair (ie if it looks like you could lift the hair off the head in one unit)[/ul][/li]
if none of these were involved, the criminality of the mullet is lessened, I think.
I have never seen a good-looking mullet but I would love to be enlightened. Particularly about what ‘modified’ refers to …
So, cowgirl, what you see to be saying is that the wearing of a mullet is a simple misdemeanor, whereas the elevation of said mullet to the status of Cletus Hair makes it a felony.
(For Canadians, this means that anyone simply wearing hockey hair is committing a summary offense; if it’s graduated to the level of a Sharbot Lake Special, it’s a criminal offense.)
I would suggest that anyone caught wearing a mullet, while also wearing blue jeans but not wearing a shirt, at any event involving men driving 4-wheeled ATVs should simply be executed without trial.
I’d love it if you at least apologized for making him cut his hair.
