An Open Letter to Some Idiots from the AFL-CIO

Dear Idiots from the AFL-CIO, don’t come to my home and pretend that you’ve rung my doorbell and missed me. I’ve been home all day, and my dog alerts me to anyone who rings the bell to the front door, meter reader, UPS, whomever.

And, AFL-CIO, don’t poorly scrawl and misspell both my name and my husband’s name on top of a preprinted note that reads:


But most of all, AFL-CIO, don’t stick that note in with a pile of 77 pieces (yes, I counted) of dirty paper (with obvious boot prints, someone clearly lay many of the sheets on the ground and stomped on them) multiple copies of four variations on a common theme: Bush Sucks, Vote Kerry, then spread that pile all the way across the width of my storm door, so that when I opened my door to leave my home, an avalanche of literally filthy propanda cascades into my foyer.

You idiots know that I’m not in your union, and neither is my husband. We never have been, never wil be. You also know full well where you got our names. You went to the county election office and got the registration list. The registration list that shows that we’re both Republicans. (Just like everyone else in the cul-de-sac where we live. I know, because I have seen the registration list too. You had no reason to be anywhere near my house.)

Moreover, you idiots know that you stopped by our house for no good reason, because you weren’t ever going to get anywhere campaigning for Kerry here. Even if I might believe for a moment that you got our names from some source other than the voter reg lists and therefore didn’t know what party we’re affiliated with long before you left your office this morning, in order to get to our front door, you had to walk past two vehicles in the driveway with Bush/Cheney stickers and a Bush/Cheney sign in our yard. What, you think your powers of persuasion are so great that we’re shout “Hallelujah, we’ve seen the light! What were we thinking! Of course, we’ll change our minds and vote Kerry!” Uh-huh. Right.

Sell that song to someone else sister, 'cuz I ain’t dancing.

You’re idiots. In fact, you’re worse than idiots. But you know what? I hope you come back again. Spunky the Wonder Bichon would like to thank you for the new liners you provided for his crate. In fact, if you show up after his supper, I’m sure he could be encouraged to provide with a token of his appreciation.

You lined your pet’s crate with filthy papers? Shame on you!

Spunky’s privileged Bichon bottom doesn’t touch the papers, so why not? They’re really not more filthy than newspaper, really, just dirty from being on the ground and walked upon.

Bichons are so cute! I give one to my Bouviers des Flandres for Christmas every year. He seems to adore 'frou-frou."

You give a dog to your dog?

I don’t think I want to know.