All the shows I tend to watch tend to be on Fox - who woulda thunk it back in the early 90s? - so I am subjected to your habit of bludgeoning viewers with your upcoming slate of dreck. Honestly, you syndicate good stuff (Seinfeld, The Simpsons), occasionally fall ass-backward into excellent programming (House, Family Guy, King of the Hill), and produce the odd bit of complete trash with redeeming qualities (American Idol, Hell’s Kitchen)… but the majority of stuff that you introduce is So Fuckin’ Bad.
Somebody greenlighted the sitcom with Michael Rappaport (The War at Home?). It’s still on air, I think. That person should be fed to alligators… bad, life-sentence serving alligators who deserved to be punished. I feel I need to tell you something: yes, it was important to note in the early 90s that American families were not all functional Cosby/Cleaver-type units. Married With Children and The Simpsons made this point quite clearly and were funny at the time. But you are way too reliant on the the dysfunctional family meme. How about changing things up a little? How about a reasonably-functional family?
So you’re hawking this new pile of tripe with Brad Garrett from Everybody Loves Raymond… (why is it that I have never met anyone who admits to regularly watching this show? Someone had to watch it for all those years!) And it’s so incredibly tired, predictable, and one-dimensional. Let’s see… the newlyweds are annoyingly huggy-kissy. The old married couple are cranky, hate each other, and take stinky dumps. This is definitely going to be a winner!
Fox, you gave birth to the dysfunctional family genre and it was good for a bit. Now, however, you are spawning the troglodytic offspring of so many bad ideas involving the nuclear family gone awry. Knock it off. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy to see you weaning yourself off of the reality tv crack that you smoked for the past five years. But you really can’t expect us to tune in to this crap can you? If the 'Til Death show makes it it will be more of a testament to the laziness of American viewers who won’t change the channel or turn off the TV than to the original premise or exciting writing of this show.
So get your act together, or you’ll be replaced by dolphins.
No, no. Manatees do the programming at Fox. They have “idea balls” in their tanks. Each ball has the name of a person, a verb, or a pop-culture reference written on it. The manatees push them down a chute where they line up like lotto balls to make script ideas.
I have to wonder if it would be more or less expensive to build and maintain a tank full of manatees above a giant lottery machine filled with customized beach balls than it would to pay the top brass at Fox.
I also have to wonder if the manatees would create anything more or less craptacular. On average.
Thank you for your letter. You’ll be glad to know “The War at Home” held 94 percent of the Simpsons lead in among teens 12-17 last year, and in fact, was the fifth most popular show among 12-24 year olds. It also got decent ratings in the 18-49 demographic.
In short, while you might not be watching the show, enough people are to keep it on the air and make us money.
The War at Home might be bad (although the mom is pretty hot) but what about that show about the kid who worked for the airline that only had a few episodes? I think it was called “Sucks”. I never had any idea what was going on while I was watching it.
Also, Fox people, nobody cares about Prison Break. Seriously. Even though you showed every episode at least 5 different times last season, nobody took the bait. Do not make another season of a show nobody cares about.
Finally, a note to Brad Garrett: You are not Jackie Gleason. He was funny. You look like the offspring of Frankenstein’s Monster and a hound dog. Go away.
Actually, Tuesdays were a very lively day at work during Prison Break and 24 (mostly picking on 24). PB had a significant following here, more than Deadwood, which, in my small group that, I seem to be the only one watches. We’re all looking forward to August 21.
Plus, the mom on The War at Home has a great rack. I confess. I was one of the 4 people watching. In my defense, I was watching on the one TV that doesn’t have cable, got only 4 channels (Fox, ABC, UPN, WB), and I needed a bridge between The Simpsons and Desperate Housewives. The show sucked, but it was still better than Extreme Makeover and whatever crap was on UPN or WB. I just looked at the mom, expecially when she was in a nightgown.
I think the new Brad Garrett one will total more screen time in 30-sec promos than in actual broadcasts, like half of what Fox broadcasts. Too bad, too, since he had the “brilliance” of “Raymond” before this and his co-star, Joely Fisher, was on such “classics” as “Ellen” and “Baby Bob.” Too bad this new one looks at least as bad.
Okay, not worse than “Baby Bob.” And not as creepy. But still way sucky.
I remember reading in a biography of Michael Eisner that ABC was seriously interested in a sitcom based on the Fountains of Wayne song Stacy’s Mom, which would have involved a group of kids who supposedly were interested in befriending this girl but the only reason they came over was because they thought her mom was hot. There’s your premise right there. We’ll keep Antia Barone as Mom and Anita Barone’s Rack as Mom’s Rack (should Mom’s Rack get top billing?) Contemplate casting call for Stacy- maybe War’s Kaylee Defer will stay on too, since she’s cute. (Should the daughter be named Stacy?) Possible catchphrase: “Whoa, check out mom’s rack!” Funds will be raised by selling investments in Mom’s Rack Productions.