OK, Paul here. Lurked for a while, made the odd post.
I live in PA, but am Scottish. 35 years old. Hello to you all 
Well hello,
thanks for helping another newbie.
I’m not an old hand, only been doping abiut a year and a half, but I welcome you nevertheless. Hope you enjoy the comraderie, and occasional dissent.
Thanks guys 
Greetings and welcome to ya, PaulParkhead.
Welcome, Paul! Where in PA? That is Pennsylvania and not some obscure abbreviation that I’m missing because I’m not sufficiently caffeinated, right? If so, howdy, neighbor!
Hello PaulParkhead. Be welcome. Enjoy your stay.
Welcome Paul! Did you bring pie? No matter. Don’t be afraid of the squid and goat, they aren’t vicious. They are just very happy to see you.
Yeah, Pennsylvania. I’m in Harrisburg. Nice to meet you.
I brought goat pie with squid gravy. Is that OK?
Hi Paul, welcome! When did you come to the US from Scotland, and what prompted your move?
Welcome, Paul! So sorry I missed your post earlier.
Buffet?
It’s a good start. We still need a live goat and squid… at least for now. (Are we using the giant squid this month, or are we back to the barrelful?)
Be sure to sign up for the Mid Atlantic Dopers, it’s a bunch of weird people who get together periodically to hang out all day.
And since you’re Scottish in Pennsylvania – paging Seige! CJ, please check in and say hi!
Well, we’ve gotta initiate ya…
shaves your head and tosses you into the Unholy Pit of Slugs
::grins widely::
pulls the lever to release the very-expired mayonnaise onto the Unholy Pit of Slugs