I answer with my number and my name.
Saves time with wrong numbers…
If it is a recognized friend I might answer something like, “FBI fraud investigation unit, thank you for returning our calls”. No wonder they never call anymore.
When it is people I know I often say "It’s your nickle, start talkin’. "
When it is “potential spam”. and I chose not to ignore it, I say “who da fuck is this?” Usually there is no human there anyway. What a waste.
Going back many years… just for giggles I would sometimes answer with either of these:
- (mimicking Adam West/Batman) “Yes Commissioner!”
- (peevish voice) “Hi, I’d like to order a pizza.”
Apparently, incredibly busy & important show biz types answer by saying “Go for jsc1953”. You could try that for a while…
I can’t expect anyone I know to know who jsc1953 is.
FYI…
“Jambo” is Swahili for “Hello.”
As others have noted, caller ID helps a lot here. For those unknown callers, IF I answer, it’s either “Articulate!” or “Do you speak Russian?”–in Russian. If they respond to either, I tell them “Hamsters are delicious” and hang up.
Yes, my wife hates it when I do this. But it’s cheap entertainment.
Just a datapoint: I have legitimately dialed such numbers and worked through the screening it entails. It was irritating and left me with a bad impression of the person I was trying to reach.
Not saying what you are doing is bad - it’s probably good, overall. But do know the impression it can leave with completely legit people who encounter it.
Typically, I don’t answer the phone at all. I let it go to voicemail and if the person calling is someone I want to talk to then they can leave me a message and I’ll decide whether I need to actually talk to them.
Otherwise, I say “hello?” and do not identify myself or agree to anything until I know who’s calling and why.
I tell them “Hamsters are delicious” and hang up.
I once read of someone who would answer with a panicky whisper “It’s done - but there’s blood everywhere”
If I get someone saying they’re from [some phone or IT company I have no dealings with] I just say “No you’re not” and hang up.
“What fresh hell is this?”
I don’t get people who don’t answer numbers they don’t know. Don’t you guys get deliveries? 90% of all unidentified calls I get are delivery people checking to see whether I’m home and asking me to buzz them in.
And I say “Hallo”, which is what people say here.
I’ve never gotten a call from a delivery person unless I was expecting them. I assume any caller I don’t recognize and aren’t expecting is either a scammer or a bill collector, and if they don’t leave me a voicemail, then I consider that suspicion confirmed.
Scammers, I just say “Sorry, not interested” and hang up. It’s just five seconds of my life. I’ve never been called by a bill collector (except for that one time I forgot to pay my electric bill and they told me they were shutting my power if I didn’t pay, so really, I was DAMN happy I answered).
You know exactly when packages will be arriving?
I don’t get calls from people delivering packages. Amazon just leaves them on the porch and takes off. I don’t think the Post Office or UPS even bother knocking anymore either and I haven’t been asked to sign for a package in ages.
OK, different country, different customs. Most people here don’t even have porches, and lots of packages require signatures.
In Japan and Taiwan people use LINE app for messaging and calling people they know.
I only rarely get phone calls and it’s almost always the doctor’s office or someone I’m expecting a call from.
I’ll answer with my name.
For LINE calls, i know who is calling and I answer with はい hai, “yes”.
No, ‘Good Morning/Day/afternoon?
I use these quite often myself.
Similar.
We signed up for nomorobo, and didn’t get much phone spam. And we have caller id, so i usually have some idea who is calling. If it’s an unknown number, or a company that someone in the household might want to talk to, i say, “hello”. I’m stingy with info, though. If they ask, “who am i talking to?”, i reply, “who is this and what are you calling about”. If it’s my daughter’s doctor’s office, they’ll say that and I’ll go fetch her.
If it’s a friend or family, I’ll answer something like, “hi, Bill, what’s up?”