Can anyone give me some big words I can use to confuse people or sound smarter than I am? Something along the lines of forsooth, erstwhile and yclept…
As a side note:
I’ve always wanted to get mad and yell at somebody using big words. They would get scared because they didn’t understand me, and that would be funny. For example:
“Forsooth! Effect your egress and resume your erstwhile post!”
Any vocabulary conducive to this would be greatly appreciated.
Shakespearian insults:
look up ‘anencephalic’. use sparingly.
Pedantic. 
Along those lines, sophomoric:)
I’ve always wanted to call someone a varlet, but inevitably forget to in the heat of the moment.
MIght take you a while, but, hey, read it while the boards are loading here/
Defenestrate.
I can’t imagine many situations where you’d use it, but who knows…
I use “ignominious” a lot - especially to confuse sportscasters 
I also have amicable feelings for “pejorative” and feel very connected to “concatenation.”
Benignant is a word I never hear anyone else use.
I Always Look Up the Word ‘Egregious’ is a book you really need to get.