Any ideas for filling in a memorial tattoo to symbolize healing from the loss?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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I don’t know how to post pictures here, or I’d upload a picture of the tattoo in question, but almost 15 years ago my ex and I had an adoption fall through at the last minute. Eight days after our son-to-be was born, after we had taken him from the hospital when he was discharged, after we had taken him to his first well-baby visit, the birth parents changed their minds and we had to hand him back to them. It devastated me for a long time, but within the last couple years I’ve finally felt like I healed from that experience. Maybe not 100% yet, but like 99.9 or something.

While I was grieving I got a tattoo for Zac, as we called him. It’s a black cookie-cutter shape of a boy, basically like a gingerbread man, but the line is dashed. Underneath it is his name, ZAC, in colorful letters in a font that reminded me of kids’ blocks. It’s rather large, covering the better part of my right triceps, and I’ve got big arms.

All these years later I have divorced and remarried; I get along OK with my ex but my current spouse is truly my person, and I carry Zac with me without letting my losing him define who I am. My older kid (who would have been Zac’s older sibling) is 17 and a senior in high school, and I have a stepdaughter who calls me Dad and who will be my adopted daughter someday. I have two great dogs who have also helped me heal every single day they’ve been in my life.

I’d like to have a symbol of my growth and healing on my body in place of a memorial to my trauma. Any ideas for how I could go about that? I’ve had the idea of creating little icons for my family members, but I don’t know if my current tattoo is large enough to also accommodate five small cartoon characters or something… I thought about an axolotl for my older kid, a cartoon lemon for my younger, a pig in a helmet for my older dog, and a doll in red pigtails for my younger dog, but I can’t think of something similar for my spouse of all people! And I’m not sure I have enough space to accomplish that with any level of detail. And I’m not sure how five little cartoons near my old tattoo symbolizes healing… and and and…

So what do you think I could do?

BTW, if you read this whole post, thank you!

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What about making the line solid?

Then you could honor the rest of your family elsewhere – where there is more space. Better than trying to squeeze them in too.

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The tattoo attests to a chapter in a life that was the path to who you are now–like a scar. Not like it’s a swastika or some other symbol that one tends to outgrow as age brings wisdom and fuller understanding. Why mess with it? You’ve got more people in your life now, but you’ve also probably still got some bare skin, ya?

Maybe the Zac tat becomes just another frame in a series/montage as you document other life events?

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Can we see a picture of the tattoo? It’s hard for me to imagine what you’re describing.

I had an adoption fall through as well, though for totally different reasons, and the child was never officially placed with us. But it’s one of the most painful things I’ve ever experienced.

But trauma can heal, and I can understand you wanting to move on.