So, I’m forcing my way through Twilight because I want to be able to show disdain with authority, and I’ve peeked at the thread about hating Sookie Stackhouse too. The time seems ripe for Dopers to write a parody of the urban fantasy genre. Am I wrong?
If I’m not wrong, let’s use this thread to brainstorm and plan on starting a story next week. It’s been a while since the last sucessful Finish The story, but there used to be some around here quite often.
I’ll now make introductory suggestions for a new story as if convinced that anyone else is still reading this post 
Remember, as a parody, we must mock all of the conventions of the subgenre.
An urban fantasy story of any flavor must have a female protagonist. One in her teens, or early 20s, because there are very few with main characters over the age of 30. I can think of…one (Elena). And two male main characters(Harry and Cal). If we can’t decide on which age to make our stellar main character, we could write about a pair of appropriately aged sisters and cover all our bases.
There should of course be vampires. And werewolves. Maybe a few ghosts. Elves. They should brood. Yes, all of them.
Main character must shed blood in varying ways for/because of the brooding things that go bump in the night. Frequently.
What else?
