http://www.pmichaud.com/toast/
Kids, don’t try this at home.
Go to a friend’s house. (j/k)
No, really, that’s why Og made Dave Barry - his work with the helmet-mounted compressed air water gun (IIRC, 75 yard range), the flaming rollerblades Barbie, and the potato gun that can launch a spud halfway across Biscayne Bay are classics in the annals of investigative journalism.
fontnor’s post was great. More kid stories, folks. I really need a good laugh this evening.
My brother put one of those frozen burritos in the microwave with a wet paper towel around it to keep it moist.
Stuck to the thing.
Remember, he can post now – and revenge is sweet! 
Did she maybe get into Zeno by way of Lewis Carroll? 
My ten year olds are constantly chafing against the age barrier. Today I was accused of making up age limits in order to keep them from hieing off to buy an X-box on their own. However, apparently ten is not the age at which one should be expected to pick up one’s clothes, with or without six reminders.
Guess, what she will be doing in 10 years.
The horror.
Sheer genius. 
'Course, they’re probably really just discussing the bouquet and sweet subtle flavors as they eat their nose products. Darned kids!
In our house, my mother hated to cook…she cleaned, ironed, did all the things mothers do, but she just hated to cook.
So, dad and all three sons learned to cook at an early age.
By 5 I was able to make a grilled cheese sandwich if my older brother was in the kitchen with me to make sure I didn’t burn the house down. I can remember standing on a little step ladder to make it.
All three of us kids are very good cooks today, and my father could make some amazing things as well.
Mom just hated to cook…and although she would try occasionally, usually one of us kids would offer to make something and get out the recipe book and go for it.
Odd family we had, but because of that I admire the 5 year old’s foray into the world of preparing food for themself. When I went off to college, my friends were amazed at what I could do with a few basic items in a kitchen.
When seven, bring pie!
Well, seeing as how she’s my third kid, by that time I’ll probably take such things in stride! As some of you may know, my 17-year-old is doing all she can to toughen my “parenting callouses”!
This discussion would be conducted with all the seriousness of long-time connoissuers at a wine tasting, no doubt!
Not a chance! She will be spending all of her allowance on replacement stuffed animals since her old ones will be stiff and sticky with boogers!