Shrug. It doesn’t seem like something to get het up about. It seems as though they were asking silly questions, not offensive ones. I can understand if you don’t want your kids to do this, Dinsdale, but it doesn’t seem worth a holiday spat. There are a few instances when it’s okay to criticize someone’s parenting, but this doesn’t seem like one of them, especially not at a large family gathering.
My two cents.
–burundi, 24
I strongly disagree with this point. Especially when one is a high-schooler learning about acceptable social and behavioral boundaries. I think the kids are experimenting with what kind of behavior they can get away with in this world, and it would be wrong to attempt to chain them up into some kind of Victorian ideal of “perfect little ladies,” because they need to have some experimenting out of the way BEFORE they go to college or otherwise get out of the house.
It’s best for them to do it now, because no one is going to get TOO furious at a bunch of giggling high-schoolers with a camera. That’s what the high-school years are for: learning about boundaries in a relatively consequence-free environment (by which I mean they’ve still got the safety net of Mom and Dad if/when they screw up). If someone gets angry at them, great! They’ll get a stern shouting from a stranger and learn a lesson, without having assault charges filed against them (or something) as an adult might.
That is how people learn to get along in society: by screwing up, crossing boundaries, and learning lessons. Well, maybe some people actually learn these things from their parents, but I certainly didn’t. Not for lack of my parents trying: I just had to go out into the world and screw up and learn the lessons myself. Just bull-headed, I guess. I’m glad the kids are out there doing the same.
Oh yeah, there was an OP. Guess I could have shortened that considerably:
I think if it’s not acceptable behavior on the kids’ part, someone who witnesses it will let them know. That’s how societal rules work, which in turn defines “acceptable behavior.”
I’m 17 and I think it is extremely rude and, more, it is very disrespectful. If we all had some respect for each other the world would be a better place. Many people my age tend to be very disrespectful; thats’s why I don’t particularily like the majority of them. Mind you, when I talk about respect I don’t mean always kow towing to authority or dressing like someone working in an office or never speaking out or any way the word is often used. I mean simply having courtesy to others and not treating people in ways designed to embarrass, harass, or annoy them. This seems malicious, pure and simple.
Those kids are being jerks and if they were on the SDMB they’d probably be banned by now. Good riddance. I don’t think the OP was out of line on commenting either. What if they did that to him/her some day? Also, the kids are asking for trouble by doing that.
By the time you are a freshman in high school you should be intelligent enough to have some compassion and respect for others.
My first reaction to the OP was not so much that it was rude but that there seems to be something up with teenagers and video cameras that is creepy. No doubt, I am probably forever tainted by a 20/20 (or something in that genre) I saw about teenagers videotaping truly horrifying acts (on others) for pleasure, but my gut tells me that what the OP describes is something that shouldn’t be encouraged.
Ah, what th’ hell. I think it’s funny, and I certainly wouldn’t be insulted.
I’m definitely enough of a ham that I’d play along and gladly answer any goofy question I felt like answer answering. I mean, I was doing silly crap like that with a video camera in public places with my buddies when I was in grad school (25 years old!), for heaven’s sake, and nobody we asked, accosted or otherwise “annoyed” seemed to mind then.
This is not a sociological experiment. The essence of this whole exercise is that it basically consists of mocking people who are not clued in to the joke. Mocking people is generally considered extremely rude. I can’t imagine a pair of people so oblivious that they would not stop their children from mocking people for amusment.
It’s extraordinarily obnoxious and people who do this kind of thing repeatedly have been known to get injured or attacked by people who realize, at some point, that they are being made fun of.
astro, I must respectfully disagree with you. For the girls doing it, a sociological experiment is precisely what it is, whether they express it that way or not. When kids get freedom (i.e., the ability to go out in public without parents chaperoning) for the first time, they want to run around and act crazy, and they’ll do it until something compels them to stop.*
I say high school is the time to let them do that; no one is going to get violent on some giggling high-schoolers. If they wait until they’re older, repercussions will be more severe. The puppy has to get smacked so that the adult dog doesn’t have to get put down, to oversimplify for the sake of clarity (and the sake of a neatly-phrased aphorism I just made up).
*All of this is entirely based on my own childhood experiences; I’m not a sociologist. I’m also not a parent; perhaps I’d feel differently if I were.
Try telling that to John Walsh…
I agree with astro and Tanaqui. I don’t need some bored teenagers trying to get their jollies out of my discomfort under the guise of innocent questions. And not only would they be considered jerks on the SDMB, but I think that would be a form of trolling.
One would think so. Unfortunately, there were a number of jerks in my Catholic high school, and I’m sure there are even more today, and still more in public high schools.
What was the name of that school? Columbine, wasn’t it?
Wasn’t John Walsh’s son abducted? Maybe I’ve got the details wrong, but as I remember it, it wasn’t a case where the kid was acting up in public and someone decided to “teach him a lesson” or something.
Nonetheless, your point is well-taken; the world is more dangerous than it used to be. Still, I think that if the downtown area wherever these people live is safe enough to let their kids go there unsupervised at all, it’s safe enough to let them go down and goof off this way.
Besides, the OP wasn’t asking if it was dangerous; I think he was asking if it was acceptable behavior. My point is that if it is unacceptable, someone will let the kids know in short order.
I’m checking out of this discussion for a while; must get to work.
Thanks again, everyone.
Nothing new to add here.
My personal experience was that the time to be goofy was college. At least then I inflicted my silliness primarily upon other college aged folk, or people associated with the college/college town.
I guess I am an opinionated jerk, but I strongly believe that on average children do not have fully equal rights as adults. And their preferences and desire for amusement should not overly intrude upon peaceful pleasant adults’. I submit that my opinion is consistent with such societal factors as drinking/voting/marriage/driving ages, compulsory schooling, child labor laws, age of emanciption, reduced competence for contracting and criminal liability, and many others. This is not to say that childrens’ interests and preferences are not important. But they certainly do not have an equal say in a vast array of matters.
And I believe people can learn important things - including manners - other than by trial and error.
Finally, conscientious parenting is very hard. One of the best tools is to hang with similarly situated parents, and discuss things. And my sisters are a good sample. They live near us, are of similar income levels, all have similar educations, were raised with exposure to the same values as me, and have kids in the same age range.
And I find social gatherings boring if everyone just listens and no one offers their opinions - at least if they would disagree with an opinion already expressed. What could you talk about at a family gathering, if you are afraid to honestly offer your opinion? I prefer an honest and open exchange, even if it comes with some risk of disagreement.
These kids are still growing up, and if every thing they “try on” doesn’t fit right away, that’s just part of the learning experience. If they weren’t phrasing things in a rude way, it’s not rude. There have been legal cases where people tried to get money for being in a picture that they didn’t authorize, and the courts sided with the photographer, saying that public places are exactly that…public.
I think it is a much sadder statement that people can’t allow these kids to develop a sense of humor, a talent, or a creative outlet. We’ve got a bunch of office zombies out there. They frequently get the art and music funds cut at school. It is very important that these kids learn about creativity. No, they’re not going to get it exactly right every time. Give them time. Many of you need to lighten up!
Oh for christ’s sake, do any of you people remember what it was like to be that age? I mean seriously, they are not threatening strangers, they are not shooting people with paint guns, they are not filming Jackass stunts…they’re ASKING PEOPLE QUESTIONS. Unless they’re asking something truly rude and reprehensible like “So how many times a day do you like being fucked in the ass?” then I see absolutely nothing wrong with it. Hell, adults come up to me and ask me stupid questions all the time and don’t even have the ingenuity to film it.
I say it’s an inventive and harmless way of releasing weird teenage energy. And I thank the gods that those of you who think this is just the rudest most offensive thing you’ve ever heard of aren’t my parents…you probably would have farmed me out for slave labour or something by the time I was twelve.
I’m 25, BTW.
No one said it wasn’t their right. I have a right to make fun of every mentally unstabe person I come across.Is it rude?, to me it isn’t,and its "fun"so its OK! .That seems to be some peoples stance here.(as long as it isn’t rude to the do-er!!)
I’ll cry rivers for those teens for you
Since I find it offensive to have a total stranger shove a camera in my face and have a laugh at my expense,I need to lighten up?
Throwing in the funding cuts was a nice touch BTW,are you an Ad exec ?
More rationalizing
Perhaps
If I cought you being rude to random adults…
I disagree, based on what I’ve read. For my part I was venting against jumping to conlusions based on incomplete evidence, or reaching good conclusions based on unstated assumptions. I think I may have committed the second offense by not mentioning that had I been a “victim”, I probably would have been amused and played along.
I gotta go, thanks for letting me participate. Have a good new year.
Well, thank you for answering my first question quite clearly. :rolleyes:
All in a days work mon;)
I’m 41 years old, so if some teenaged, giggly girls held a camera in front of me and started to pepper me with questions I’d have a little fun and joke with them on tape in order to be a good sport. But, if they crossed that fuzzy line into being cruel and taunting me I’d be seriously tempted to “accidently” knock the camera to the ground in pieces. Whoops!
All in good fun of course. 
I have 2 teenage boys and I’d not let them do this unless I was really sure they’d not be jerks.