Are parents "reliable witnesses" in assessing their kids?

[monstro]

@Disheavel

No. Categorically and emphatically no.

We have raised our children to do their best, to always try their hardest. And they do a good job, but when we speak (not in front of our children) honestly about their abilities, strengths, weaknesses, and future paths we envision for them- brutally honestly given all we know- we have other parents (our friends, our own siblings) trying to build up our views of our children’s abilities. It is so awkward for them that we don’t think our children are Einstein and (Tom) Brady or Curie and Biles all rolled into one person, that they can’t not try to convince us otherwise. These are people who have known my children their whole lives and even they can’t be honest. So (most) parents are not capable of a fair assessment if even other nearby people are similarly blind in their assessments.

I’m trying to imagine the kind of conversations you’re having with people. Do the folks in your social circle sit around and try to one-up each other with stories of how magnificent their kids are? What conversational paths lead you to talking about your kids’ abilities, strengths, weaknesses, and future paths to such detail that people start feeling awkward?