I try to get everywhere extra early and give myself lots of time to get places. As I answered in the poll, being late stresses me out. Heck, being just on time (instead of early) has been known to stress me out too.
I like to get places early because it gives a good impression and it gives me time to relax and prepare for whatever it is I’ll be doing.
Reminds me of a Woody Allen quote.
One more NO option would have me better: NO, and I try my hardest never being late to anything I promised to be present for. It doesn’t so much stress me as makes me feel incompetent to manage my travels. I’d much rather be a bit early than a little late. When I am late I do apologize, if that’s possible.
I’m not quite as anal about being on time that I would “walk thru fire”, but that was the closest one to my situation, so that’s what I picked.
The thing that kills me about chronically late people (and one of my best friends is like that) is how often they think it’s just a one-time event. They will make excuses as if this particular time is the only time they’re late, and I feel like smacking them across the face saying: It’s not the gas station’s fault or your dog’s fault… YOU ARE ALWAYS FUCKING LATE. ALWAYS!!! DO NOT PRETEND THAT THIS IS SOME ANOMALY!
I said no, no big deal. I make an effort to not be late because it’s rude but I wont walk through fire to avoid it and if I am late it’s not a big deal because I don’t make a habit of it.
Being late only stresses me out if I’d be missing a transportation connection that would cause me to have to catch the next bus/train/etc, or its an event I wanted to see from the beginning (concert, movie, etc). But that would require me to leave too late to begin with, which doesn’t happen 99% of the time.
Otherwise, it doesn’t stress me out to think of being late. I wouldn’t run lights or do anything reckless to get there on time. I always aim to get there on time, though. If traffic happens, it happens. In high school I would make a game of trying to show up at the end location exactly, literally, on time to the minute. Succeeded quite a bit.
This is a really great point - I’m pretty good at coming up with excuses (real or imagined), but at work I quickly learned that if you are late several times over a short period, it becomes irrelevant how great or genuine the excuse is - you are late, that’s all there is to it. Make more effort next time, leave earlier, get the bus before the bus before the one that will get you there on time.
I am a project manager so my whole livelihood depends upon me being on time with the goods in an as agreed upon condition. I am quite the a-hole to people in my professional sphere who stand in my way of making my commitments. I always give them advance notice of what’s expected and I’ve flat out told customers that I won’t pay for expedited shipping due to their errors or misfortunes. I am quite the terror to some consistently late suppliers but with customers I’m much nicer.
In my personnel life I realize that this isn’t realistic to expect in most social situations so I tend to tell chronically late people to show up earlier than necessary and then show up on time myself. This way if they show up when I ask they get a feel for how it is when someone is late. If they show up as the same time we can use it as a bonding experience. The only time I get really peeved at people in social situation is when we have tickets to an event and they cop an attitude that being late isn’t a big deal. Duh, I pay money to see the whole show and hang and relax. I don’t like having to rush around and miss part of an event and not be able to socialize before hand. I generally don’t make plans to go back out with people like that and limit them to non-planned events. I have one friend who used to ask why we don’t out to concerts anymore and I just say that I’m committed to other people who show up.
I’m absolutely anal about being on time. I also seem to be the only one in my social circle (and family) for whom timeliness is important so I don’t stress about others being on time. They just lose the right to bitch when they see my Kindle. The one exception to this is my Mom whom I run to Doctors appointments. She is chronically late to these and wonders why she’s always called last, it use to frustrate me but now I just download work to my Kindle or catch up on my latest novel.
If it’s something where punctuality is very important, like a doctor’s appointment or lunch with a friend, then I abide by the old “if you’re not five minute early, you’re late” philosophy. While I am sometimes late for these, being late does stress me out and I do whatever I can to avoid that.
There are some things that I’ve learned not to worry so much about. Like a get-together at a friend’s house, where the time isn’t necessarily meant to be exactly 7:00 pm to 9:00 pm, but rather “when enough people get off work and when they all decide to go home.”
My old (in both senses) anatomy prof had some good techniques for dealing with this. First, he seemed to know the name of all 150 of us somehow. If one person came in late, he would stop lecture and say, ‘Class, how many minutes early should Albert set his alarm clock?’ [I use the name Albert because he was a memorably case].
Another good line: If someone blamed traffic he’d say ‘I take the same busses that you do.’
Well, “Party starts at 7:00” never really means that the party starts at 7:00. Even the host knows that!
I’m punctual to.a fault. I always think to myself “how long will it take if something not that unusual goes wrong.” I’m thinking lights out of sync, ect. However, my wife thinks “what is the latest we can leave if everything goes perfectly” and leaves 5-10 minutes after that.
I’m pathologically prompt, and I get annoyed at others who are chronically late. I don’t mind it occasionally–shit happens, I get it. But, for example, the spouse (who’s like me) has a sibling who is ALWAYS late. I mean, ALWAYS. I think she has some kind of passive-aggressive power trip thing going by making everybody wait. And the rest of the family DOES wait. They just put up with the fact that, “Oh, yeah, she’s late, ha-ha.”
Pisses me right the hell off, and spouse too (though he goes along to preserve harmony). Fortunately I don’t have to deal with her very often (she’s fine the rest of the time–a bit overly loud and bossy, but I can deal with that and overall she’s a good person) but I’ve told the spouse that if her lateness ever directly affects something of mine, I won’t wait for her. She can just catch up. He’s fine with that. So far, it hasn’t happened so we’re good.
Yes… well… it only took me thirty years to figure that one out. :smack:
In defense of wives: I used to be mildly but chronically late. Then I met my wife, who is the most considerate person I’ve ever known. She really drove home to me the disrespectful message that being late sends, and I’ve been meticulously punctual ever since.
For most things I don’t like being late, but I’ve never walked through fire to be on time.
I joke that I’m physically incapable of being late. I think I can count on one hand the times in my adult life I have been more than 5 minutes later than I wanted to be. I actually TRY to be 20 minutes late to certain things (parties) and still wind up only 5 minutes late, which is early for the events I’m talking about. So I wait in my car for 10 plus more minutes :smack: because the “party starts at 7”, means 7:15 or 7:30
After I had kids, everyone said it would be much harder to be on time. I don’t think so. Babies? Just grab them, the pre-packed bag, and leave. Build in 10 minutes in case of diaper emergency. Done. Older kids? Teaching them to be ready on time is just good parenting.
So I basically don’t get chronic lateness. Stuff happens, anyone can hit traffic or forget something or somehow end up late once in a while. Fine, I understand. But the people who are never on time? Why?
To me, it’s basic thinking. It takes 15 minutes to get where you’re going and you need to be there at 9? Leave no later than 8:45, 8:40 to build in time for delays. You take 30 minutes to get dressed, and 20 for breakfast, and it’s nice to have 10 minutes to relax in the AM? That’s an hour. So wake up and get started by 7:40. Easy. I like round numbers so I’d have my alarm set for 7:30, and be out by 8:30 with a book in my bag to pass the early time. Much less stressful than running around trying to be on time and worrying.
I’m always early, I really hate being late, that’s not the kind of attention I enjoy.
My sister in law is always late. I always had to tell them that dinner was at least an hour earlier than it actually was planned for. Drove me insane and it’s one thing I don’t miss about hosting the holiday dinners. But she’s family and I love her anyway.
I’m chronically early. My hunting buddy used to tell me to pick him up at 7:30 even though he actually wanted to leave at 7. I’d pull up around 6:45 and all was right with the world.