Are You "High Maintenance" in Restaurants?

In My Humble Opinion
81

I don’t see asking for different side as being a big deal, as long as it is something that is on the menu. I really don’t need the carbs, and the trend lately is to salt the fries into submission, so I’ll ask for something else - anything else - cole slaw, veggies, salad - something easy and common.

I have never sent a dish back in my life. I eat my meat medium-rare, but I’ve never had it be more than one grade off (>rare, <medium), so I just eat it. I once made the mistake of eating the “daily special” in an Olive Garden in Utah (two strikes), where the beef in the salad was just bad, as in spoiled. The waiter saw my face and just comped the meal. Of course I didn’t want to eat anything after that, so I just left.

Some people are so fussy I swear they are just doing it to be difficult. I can’t stand people like that.

If it’s fine dining, I eat, and order as it is served. Those things are there for a reason.

82

I work on the road, live out of a suitcase (think George Clooney in ‘Up in the Air’) so I eat in restaurants almost exclusively.

Personally, I’m rather low maintenance. However, I can respect some behavior that wouldn’t be called that.

Food allergies, ingredients that are easily left out that are objectionable, healthy alternatives - I’m OK with people making these kind of substitutions or requests. If they brought you the wrong meal (some restaurants are so noisy you can say “Chicken Salad” and they bring you “Shish-kabob” 'cause that’s what they heard) then I have no problem sending it back. Also if the meal is just foul (cold, too salty, etc.) I say send it back.

But, I get the cringes when someone goes into a nice restaurant and totally disrespects the efforts the chef made in designing the dishes. These are professionals, they use their years of training and experience and creativity to combine the ingredients and methods to give you something they think is worthwhile. It would be like going to a concert with a name act and telling the musicians how to play, and that you want them to play that song by that other band.

83

Yep. Firstly, it had to be a big ‘surprise’! and I was going to be really excited when we got there. (I hate surprises. Everyone knows I hate surprises. My MIL said I won’t tell you, 'cus it’s going to be a surprise. I said 'Dot, I hate surprises.)

So we walk up to the steak house and I get a WTF?!?!:confused: look on my face. My MIL turned to me, totally sincere, and said 'Well, I called and they have vegetables!"

MIL said, in her saddest voice, ‘We don’t HAVE to eat here I guess…’, so rather than being a big, bad bitch I went in and had a plate of grilled carrots for my birthday. Next year when they invite us out, I think I’ll just tell hubby we should skip it.

I mean, I don’t begrudge anyone a nice steak dinner, and if they really wanted to try the place, fine. Just don’t try to dress it up like they’re doing something on MY account, 'cus they’re really not.

/hijack.

84

I can’t remember the last time I sent something back or asked for a substitution/change of ingredients.

It’s not that I have any aversion to doing so. It’s just never come up! I guess I must have a very wide range of enjoyable food!

85

I recently had to send one back. I ordered the chicken caesar wrap. It’s usually a slam dunk for me at most restaurants so I was happy with my order.

Then it came and …something wasn’t right. First off, it was packed with tomatoes and that seemed odd but I could deal with it. Then I took a bite and …weirdly sweet? I look closer …yellow?

The waitress stops by and looks at me like she was in trouble and says “how is it?” and I said “It’s awful.” She said “That’s what I thought! We ran out of Caesar dressing in the back so the cook said he’d use Italian. He said it’s pretty much the same thing.” She let me reorder something else and didn’t charge for either item, which was nice.

86

I worked in a restaurant for years, these are pretty good examples of whats a pain in the ass and what really isn’t. I still prefered the HM customers over the ass-holes that treated you like a serf in their kingdom.

But then that’s what phlegm is for.

87

The only thing I have had a problem with recently was something new that I tried at a sportsbar and instead of sending it back, I ate it. It was a pastrami Reuben…there was nothing wrong with the sandwich technically, it was perfectly prepared, I just had a problem with the cheap ass, thin sliced, rubbery pastrami. It was terrible in taste and texture…they might as well have had boiled ham on there… blech.

But I figure that’s on me, I wanted to try it, it sounded good, I was expecting something different and well, maybe someone with a more forceful personality wold have asked for something else. And besides… on their menu they have a specific clause that warns that you cannot return the hottest wings because the sauce is too hot.

Not really their fault that I didn’t like it.

88

I feel you. When I was vegan a bunch of my co-workers took me out to a birthday lunch at Outback Steakhouse.

People can be totally oblivious sometimes.

89

One of my co-workers/friends is vegan and the only reason she ever gets to have a portion of the birthday celebration cake/square/snack other than when she makes it, is if I bake something for her. Including on her own birthday.

90

Well, some vegetarians I have known actually want to go to a steakhouse on their birthday. That’s the one time of the year that they go hog wild and dine on flesh. Just sayin…

91

I will make special requests of omission - a salad without the chicken (or on the side if a companion wants it) or hold the mushrooms, since I am apparently the only vegetarian in the world who doesn’t like mushrooms. At places I’m familiar with, I may request a substitution if I know they have what I’m asking for, and I make sure to phrase it as a request, not a demand (ie, “could I get bell pepper in this instead of zucchini?”). You go to a restaurant knowing that they have a menu, created by a chef - if you don’t want to eat what that chef came up with, go somewhere else.

I’ve only once sent a meal back, and that was because my grilled cheese sandwich was no longer warm in the slightest.

Also, what’s up with all the onion hate?

92

My husband is usually a very calm and quiet person. He’s the very definition of low maintance in restaurants.

However the very angriest I’ve ever seen him at a restaurant was at a Ponderosa where the waitress served us nearly blackened steak and told us it was medium rare.

Twice.

We have not been back since.

93

While I order off the menu - no problem, and that’s what I voted - I think I am high maintenance in that if my food does not match my expectations, I bitch like hell. It’s sort of a graph; the more I pay for food, the more I expect the food to be hot, to be cooked to my desired degree of doneness, etc.

So, with that caveat, I do not ask the restaurant to add sliced tomato and diced onion to my grilled cheese sandwich.

94

Although, I feel for you and your husband’s situation, I also feel for the chef at Ponderosa (probably some 17 year old kid). Perhaps this is another example of expectations not quite aligning with reality. The steaks at Ponderosa are a notoriously thin cut and pre-vacuum-packed marinated (I have also heard that they are foreiugn meat). Even he, (your husband), and most cooks would have a hard time ensuring a rarish steak.

95

I was just eating in a Denny’s this evening and I sent my coffee back.

I had ordered tea.

96

“Hold the tomato” is high maintenance? :confused:

I don’t think I am. I often special order, but I also make it a point to do everything at once. I’ll order extra of something with my dish instead of letting the server deliver then asking them to go back when it wasn’t enough.

I’ve never sent anything back or “this steak is too raw” “this soup is too cold” etc. They’ve delivered the wrong dish before, I’ll just eat it provided it looks appetizing.

97

I only answered high maintenance due to issues that I have with onions; If I see something on the menu I want, but it includes onions, I ask that they be witheld. If no dice, I just order something else.

98

I’m one of those picky eaters. But I make sure to get around it by simply ordering stuff I know I like or taking care of it myself at the table (ie, removing the tomato from the burger).

99

I agree.

Key point: There’s no harm in asking.

If you’re perfectly happy with a menu item as advertised and prepared, then, of course, sit back and enjoy your dining experience. But, it is an experience and not just the ingestion of sufficient nutrients to satisfy a physiological need. There are many less expensive ways of filling your tummy.

If, though, you have even a slight desire to ask for something different, you can, of course, choose not to ask (for a variety of reasons), but don’t hesitate because you think that you will be perceived as high maintenance by the restaurant staff.

Restaurants charge money for providing food, service, and ambiance. Paying customers are entitled to an enjoyable meal. If you are not okay with what’s offered, then ask for something else. Any decent restaurant will have no problem with minor substitutions. Any decent waiter will encourage you to do so.

And, for those of you who “have never sent anything back”, have you ever purchased something at a store and then later returned it for an exchange or a refund? If you have, why didn’t you just keep it? After all, the manufacturers and retailers know that what they’re doing, and the store offered you many choices, and you chose one particular item, so tough, right? In fact, the next time you are in the store, you should tip the person who sold you the item. After all, it wasn’t their fault that the item was defective or inadequate, or it just turned out that you didn’t like it. :dubious:

Yes, when dining with friends, family, or business associates, you have to balance your right as a paying customer to an enjoyable meal with whatever disruption you might cause to your shared dining experience by addressing a particular concern. No simple answer here. Sometimes it’s best to just ignore it even if the meal sucks. Other times, it’s best for all concerned (you, your dining companions, the restaurant staff and management) to address the deficiencies directly and politely.

100

:eek:
That story has me a bit stunned. It doesn;t really cast yout MIL in a great light.

Seriously, carrots on your birthday?!?

Next year, tell your husband that you’re picking the restaurant.