Ashcroft is Coming

He’s going to be speaking at my school in March (I believe). While this undoubtedly is the work of our conservative group here on campus, I’m really debating whether I should go or not. I don’t support Ashcroft, I really can’t think of anything he ever did that I supported, but on the other hand, its not every day I’ll have the chance to speak to somebody who held (deservingly or not) such a high office, which makes me think I should at least hear what the guy has to say.

So, this is my dilemma, I suppose. Is Ashcroft deserving of my attention just because of an office he once held?

This in itself isn’t a pit thread, but I’m assuming it’ll move in that direction as his merits are discussed.

At least he’s not cumming.

I see nothing wrong with going to see Ashcroft speak. I don’t know if I would speak to him, given the chance, or would spend a lot of money to get a seat.

But at worse, he’ll only confirm what you think of him, and he may even mitigate that opinion if you hear more than a 30 second soundbite explaning his decisions over the years.

I guess it depends on how open you are to ideas that may differ from your own. If nothing else, the rabid opponents protesting should be entertaining enough to attend regardless of your position. (Oh, yes. There will be protesters.)

It would depend on where he is speaking. If it’s in front of any Victorian versions of Greek statuary, then I would go–just to see if he required any draping of said statue.

Other than that-I’d skip it.

How do you know he’s going there to speak? It could be a concert engagement, and that, my friend, is something you simply cannot afford to miss. The guy makes Tiny Tim sound like a hack.

Absolutely go see him. One thing we should always be willing to do is listen to those we disagree with (okay, maybe not literally always) in order to be fair and honest about our own opinions.

Also, it’s really, really important to be respectful of those with whom we disagree. No shouting to drown him out, or hitting him with a pie or anything. That just makes the people doing it look bad.

But what if it’s a piping-hot blueberry pie? What then?

You could ask him what it’s like to lose an election to a corpse.

(assuming I’m remembering correctly)

-Joe

Another vote to attend, and behave yourself while attending. Being exposed to different points of view is an important part of the college experience.

I was thinking exactly the samr thing.

You owe me a new monitor.

Yes, go.

If you luck out and there is a question/answer period, throw him a sideball.

“Mr Ashcroft. I have a two part question. Was it hard working with Gary Coleman and Todd Bridges on the set of Diff’rent Strokes and was the death of Dana hard for you?”

What would be really cool is if you can get 30-40 people to go and ask other questions about Diff’rent Strokes.

“Mr Ashcroft, thank you for coming. I always wondered, was the sexual tension between you and Mrs Garret written in or was that a real behind the scene romance?”

Really, you were thinking Tiny Tim?

Ah, how could you not?

Well, i went to see Ann Coulter when she spoke at my university, and she makes John Ashcroft look sane and reasonable.

I even wrote a report covering the main points of her speech, but the thread seems to have disappeared.

I want to see him sing the “Eagle Soar” song, while the crowd flicks Bics and waves them in the air. Then sombody screams out “Free Bird!”

Nah, why waste it on him? Just save it for afterwards and eat it with some vanilla ice cream while discussing what an asshole he is.

If you could do that with a straight face, that’d be hilarious.

I’d sooner burn my eyes with cigars than to go see that man. He’s an authoritarian Troglodyte who thinks my life is his business. He has nothing to say that would interest me.

I suppose it would be, but I don’t get it. What’s supposed to be the connection between Ashcroft and Diff’rent Strokes? Or is this one of those surrealism things, where it would be just as funny if you asked him about how hard it was to spend so much time on the set of The Facts of Life with Kristy MacNichol and Janet Jackson?