Ashton Kutcher is in hard training for the apocalypse.

[Foggy]

Huffingtonpost Link

Speaking to Men’s Fitness, Kutcher predicts that the “end of days” is on its way, and he wants to be prepared for the inevitable madness. He told the magazine (quotes via JustJared):

“It won’t take very much, I’m telling you. It will not take much for people to hit the panic button. The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone. You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle. People don’t have maps anymore. People use their iPhones or GPS systems, so if there’s no electricity, nobody has maps.”

So what’s a soothsaying star supposed to do when he sees the end of the world? Kutcher is stocking up on guns and spending hours and hours running the canyons near his home, pushed on by visions of being chased by wild boar. He’s also taking daily bikram yoga sessions, and learning Krav Maga, a deadly Israeli combat technique taught to high-powered special ops.

Weird. Don’t know much about him and I don’t think I have ever seen him in anything. I think he’s cute.

Well everyone needs a hobby.

[leander]

Sounds like he’s trying to punk the world.

[Boyo_Jim]

I didn’t think he could possibly be as stupid as his character on That 70s Show, but maybe I was wrong.

[GuanoLad]

On the one hand he’s right, it wouldn’t take too much for madness to ensue. On the other hand, its imminence and inevitability may be somewhat exaggerated; and his preparations are laughable.

[elfkin477]

I don’t see how he’s wrong, you can watch this documentary that shows you that everything he’s talking about would come to pass if we lost all our ability to use electronic banking.

[Boyo_Jim]

Did the Mayans predict we would lose electronic banking in 2012?

[Shirley_Ujest]

@Boyo_Jim

Did the Mayans predict we would lose electronic banking in 2012?

I thought they predicted my Borders gift card would be wiped clean.

[RikWriter]

"Ashton Kutcher is in hard training for the apocalypse. "

And don’t think the apocalypse doesn’t appreciate it.

[Boyo_Jim]

I hope he wins a gold medal.

[Spoke]

@Boyo_Jim

I hope he wins a gold medal.

Well if he’s the only guy left on Earth, you’ve gotta like his chances.

[BrainGlutton]

@GuanoLad

On the one hand he’s right, it wouldn’t take too much for madness to ensue. On the other hand, its imminence and inevitability may be somewhat exaggerated; and his preparations are laughable.

Indeed they are. All you really need to know, you’ll find in Revelation X: The “Bob” Apocryphon, Chapter 10, “X-Odus”:

B: FOR THOSE WHO “CHOOSE” TO STAY BEHIND:
(i.e., SubGenii who “refuse to fall for it,” and never send in that $30)

SUPPLIES TO STOCKPILE:

We could go on and on about water purification tablets, first aid kits, spare batteries, shortwave radios, flashlights, candles, propane stoves, gas masks, toilet tissue, strong disinfectants, survival food tabs, MREs, freeze-dried crap, duct tape, baby formula, emergency ponchos, etc., but WHO ARE WE KIDDING?? The ONLY THINGS you’ll REALLY NEED are:

A. TONS OF GUNS and AMMO.
Especially the ammo. Amateurs are always stockpiling guns, and forget the massive ammounts of ammo (casings, clips, powder, loaders) that’ll also be needed.

B. POUNDS OF CRACK COCAINE.
Not for you! For your “soldiers.”
With the above, you will find it easy to procure water, food, shelter, medicine, etc.

C. GALLONS OF LIQUID LSD.
For you, to keep you FANATICAL . . . to make you a LEADER!

HONE SURVIVALIST SKILLS that those other so-called ‘complete survivalist manuals’ don’t mention.

Learn how to deal with ANYTHING. Memorize science “fiction” movies like Road Warrior. The future will be at minimum that bad no matter WHAT else happens on X-Day. Learn how to subsist on radiation. PLAN YOUR FOOD SUPPLY. Learn which parts of your neighbors are edible. You might even consider starting an orphanage now, just to assure yourself a decent cache of meat when the need arises. Buy land and fence it – a real fence, the kind that’ll bring a tear to the eye of a Colombian druglord. Build two entrances: one heavily guarded main gate, and a hidden escape tunnel. Put a huge, well-lit, well-guarded, luxurious-looking house in the middle, and a small, comfortable, hidden house near the escape route. Live in the little secret house. During the insurrections of the End Days, you’ll be able to sit back, free from worry, and spend your spare time gunning down the panicked Normals who try to break in. Guaranteed fun for the whole family!

[Dewey_Finn]

To be honest, he’s right that most people would be lost without electricity and other utilities. And assuming he lives in California, it’s reasonable to prepare for an emergency such as an earthquake or other natural disaster.

[The_Second_Stone]

Michael Kelso was such an intellectual stretch for Ashton.

[kenobi_65]

@Foggy

Weird. Don’t know much about him and I don’t think I have ever seen him in anything.

He’s an actor (mostly known for “That 70s Show”) and TV producer (has been executive producer for a number of reality-type TV shows, including “Punk’d” (which he also hosted) and “Beauty and the Geek”). He’s the spokesman for Nikon cameras, and has been appearing in TV commercials for them for several years.

But, he’s probably best-known in pop culture for being married to Demi Moore (which puts him in the tabloids fairly frequently).