pabbybear and others who donated or are planning to donate, you bring a tear to my eye and restore faith in humanity.
Shame on those of you "tsk-tsk"ing the OP and others, as if they hadn’t put a lot of thought and planning into this. You think that you know more than they do? They go through TONS of meetings, tests, counseling, etc before making this decision and can back out at any time. And you really think your little 5 minute post telling them to think more about it and that you can’t understand why anyone would do that for someone they didn’t know is going to add any value at all to that huge process? Give me a break.
We should all be so lucky to have more people like the OP in the world.
A friend of mine also donated to a stranger, and doesn’t regret one bit of it. He said recovery from the surgery wasnt exactly fun, but not horrifically painful either (he was a fit healthy man in his late 20s at the time - mostly he was bored by having to take it easy). He is still in close touch with his recipient. I think it is one of the most selfless things any of us can do, and should be celebrated. Good luck!
There are good people in the world, my good friend Cerridwyn not the least among them, whose very lives depend on there being like the OP in the world.
I got the news today that I am approved as a donor!
I have to provide a letter from my doctor saying that he is aware that I’m donating and that he is prepared to deal with any psych issues afterward or refer me to someone who will. Depression is very common in living kidney donors even under the best circumstances, and I have a history of depression and anxiety. I considered not telling them that when they asked during the evaluation, but I decided that I would trust their judgement. Anyway, I am approved!
The next step is getting my team together with the recipient’s team to make sure that my kidney is right for him and that he is ready for surgery. Then we can schedule. I am shooting for early April.
Just keep spreading the word that you need one. You never know who will step up. I am hoping that, by sharing my experience, I can get more people to consider donating. I don’t think it’s for everyone, of course, but I think there are people out there who would consider it if they knew more about it.
For anyone who might be keeping up, I have a tentative surgery date of September 30. Apparently it is not an easy thing to reserve an operating room. This is taking much longer than I had expected!
I thought I’d resurrect this thread since a few people said they’d like to keep up. I’m currently in San Diego for the transplant. I did all my pre-op stuff yesterday: got 17 tubes of blood drawn, EKG, chest x-ray, physical, signing papers, talking to the team. The one really annoying part was having to sit down with a nurse who does relaxation techniques like guided imagery (Ok, fine) and energy work (um, nope). When I talked to the surgeon later, I told him to put a note in my chart that they need to keep the crazy lady away from me. Fortunately, he felt the same way I did. Surgery will be first thing Tuesday morning (9/30/14). Assuming all goes to plan, the recipient has dialysis for the last time on Monday.
I’ve been following this thread with interest, and look forward to hearing your experiences over the next days and weeks. This is a noble thing you’re doing, regardless of your “aw shucks” attitude. Kudos to you.
One of my husband’s colleagues is slated to go on the transplant list 'most any time now, and I plan to be tested to see whether I’m a candidate to donate a kidney for him. Sarge is the best of good men, and (it’s a long story) I offered him a kidney before he even knew he needed one, much less before I knew. My husband desperately wants to do the honors himself, but he’s not a candidate due to other medical issues. Sarge has two kids that need him to hang around, and even if he didn’t? He’s the kind of guy the world needs more of. If my kidney can help? He’s welcome to it. I really, really hope that I’m a candidate - if not for a direct donation, then for a chain that allows him to get off of dialysis and get on with his life.
Way too cool, silvorange! Again, a huge thank you from an anonymous person who thinks what you’re doing is beyond wonderful.
Hope all goes well and you both mend quickly.
(True story - happened right after I posted above: Sarge has a day off today. He just called to say he’s on his way over to cut the grass. Fortunately, I’ve been able to get my own lawn mower fixed, so I was able to tell him “no thanks,” but he planned to load up his own lawn mower, drive 20 miles to my house, cut an acre of grass, refuse to even let me put gas in his mower or truck, and then load up and drive home. This is a man who is on dialysis already, who works 40+ hours a week, who has delivered groceries to my house when my husband was in the hospital, who wrote a recommendation for my daughter for a scholarship application, etc. He’s a mensch.)
Sounds like an awesome guy. I hope my experience can be helpful to you. I’m putting more details into a blog on Tumblr. I can’t remember whether linking to that kind of thing is OK here, but if it is I will post it later.
Silvorange, let me tell you about myself. I’m an OR nurse in the USAF. I’m also the mother of a former soldier. When my son was deployed, I suffered agonies for fear of his safety. And when I was deployed, I saw his face in every young man that came across my table. What I got from that is this: Every kid is someone’s kid. Everyone has family that would do anything to keep them safe, and when they can’t, and they have to hope strangers do it for them, it’s the worst kind of helpless. It was my honor and privilege to be the stranger that was there for those kids when their own mothers couldn’t be. And what you are doing is so far beyond that. For every mother that has ever suffered for her child when she couldn’t help, I would like to thank you. For every spouse, child, parent, sibling who can’t imagine life without their family member…thank you. What you are doing is a wonderful thing.
Thanks for the kind words, you guys. It’s a weird subject to talk to people about. This is a major thing in my life right now, which means I can’t help talking about it, but people don’t always know what to say, and I don’t know how to respond to what they do say. Overall, it seems that I am a hero-saint-moron who should probably keep quiet about it.