Ask the guy who's having frozen corn dogs for dinner

Weird, I opened this thread thinking I posted something I didn’t remember. I also had frozen corn dogs for dinner late last night and I bought them on an impulse…a really really strong one. I haven’t had them in years before that. Did other Dopers pick up this signal as well? I had mine with French’s mustard too which I rarely use. Regular hotdogs get the spicy brown mustard. I don’t necessarily believe in a collective consciousness but something happened last night. I had two of them. Maybe they represent the World Trade Centers collapsing bit by bit and the oozing bright yellow mustard symbolizes fear. The more things I learn, the more I realize there is so much we don’t understand even when it comes to the deeper meaning of your processed meat products on a stick dipped in batter and dipped in brightly colored condiments. I did come to understand that rank farts and bloating have a bigger effect on your psyche than whatever it is you are contemplating the next day though.

Are they made from real dog?

I prefer a traditional hot dog in a bun, and as I believe I said earlier, my favorite variety is an all-beef Hebrew National. They answer to a higher authority.

Condiments-wise, on a regular dog I grew up (in the PacNW) eating them w/ ketchup, mustard, and sweet relish. When I moved to Chicago, I discovered Chicago-Style dogs (mustard, bright green relish, onions, tomatoes, pickle, with sport peppers and celery salt.). I like the Chicago dog but actually prefer something simpler. I think my favorite is how Gray’s Papaya does them in NYC with mustard and those canned cooked onions they use. I’d say the most common condiment combination I use these days is just mustard and diced onions, with celery salt if it’s available.

Never forget.

I forget.

Will it be about your life as a gay porn star?

I’ve never had a corn dog. Are they any good?

A dog made from corn? ewww.

Sort of, but it will also feature the tattoo/pawn shop I own and my staff of quintuplet dwarfs.

Oh my goodness yes.

You should see its ears!

When I visited Atlantic City some years ago, there was a Hot Dog On A Stick every quarter mile or so, I wonder if they’re still there. They weren’t very good. I think all the girls who worked there, best case scenarios, eventually wound up on some kind of reality show.

Anyway, in your package of corn dogs, did you ever notice that there is always ONE corn dog that has a really foul taste? Like it’s spoiled?

I don’t think we shop at the same store.

Those are known as Tuna Dogs. Some people prize them but they are the same people that watch Jersey Shore every week. Some of the packaging girls do get a little too much enjoyment out of their job though and it is a known quality control problem in the industry. There was a short-lived company that manufactured Corn-Hole dogs but they got shut down by the FDA because of e. coli concerns.

And three days ago my kid asked me to buy some for the first time in about 8 years, so I did, but I wish I had gotten the Target ones.

Sonic sells corn dogs, by the way, and they are pretty good, especially with an order of onion rings. There’s a Sonic less than 1/20 of a mile away from our house, and so I’m constantly tempted. Sonic’s corn dogs seem to be made of four legged critters, not two legged, by the way.

There was an ad in Parade Sunday magazine today for Jimmy Dean Jimmy D’s Griddle Sticks, pancake batter-covered turkey breakfast sausage on a stick, identical to corn dogs, just like at the kids’ school. The collective unconsciousness is powerful this week.

At the State Fair, they serve “Pronto Pups” which are not corn dogs but pancake-battered hot dogs. Boy, are they good.